Client Refuses to Understand What Broken Arm Entails and more...

This guy gets a lot of belligerent customers, whether they're a private school upset about getting upgrades after a charity or a treasurer who doesn't understand numbers. In this case it's a client who seems to want him to outsource the work, but also not outsource it at the same time. Sounds like a fun person to do business with.

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$Text - Custom unit 2 days ago Details unfortunately i won't be able to build your Hi unit by the the 12th of Jan. I have a fracture in my second favourite arm. There's a couple of guys that do good work that i can arrange something with if you like. Cheers to me 2 days ago Details is this a joke? I'm not sure whether you're being Hi serious or not. As discussed this was for a 40th birthday.$

2.

$Text - 2 days ago Details Hi unfortunately it's no joke mate. I fractured it playing football over the weekend. I've already discussed the project with . and e and they can do it for you by the set date for the same price. They do good work so they'l| look after you. to me 2 days ago Details I'm sorry for your injury but I do not wish to enter into another arrangement. Don't you have staff that can complete this job? I really need this by the 12th. Thanks$

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Text - 2 days ago Details ,I apologise for the inconvenience mate, Неу but my staff are all on leave till the 14th so it's just me right now. I can't do much with one arm. The 2 companies mentioned are the only people in the industry i trust and recommend. They're happy to accommodate you. to me 2 days ago Details thank you but no. We entered an agreement and I wish to have the order filled as per our discussed deadline. I do not wish to risk this with any one else. Perhaps you can get one or mo

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Text - 2 days ago Details I won't call my guys back from vacation and i can't unbreak my arm. The job can still be done on time, just not by us. That's a solid no to me 2 days ago Details So you decide to let me know 10 days before the due date that you can't do it? You need to factor in these things. If you can't meet a deadline then you'll need to bend over backwards to get it done. Hire someone or outsource it don't just cancel. You have put me in a difficult position now

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Text - 2 days ago Details Yes. Next time l'll definitely give you notice before i break my arm. I guess you missed the part where i made arrangements with other companies to get your order filled? That's called outsourcing. It also includes the bending over that you like people to do for you. to me 2 days ago Details And then you resort to throwing shade at a client that you jerked around. I'll leave an appropriate detailed review for you.

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Text - 2 days ago Details I'm not familiar with the term "throwing shade" but all this talk of bending over and jerking off is very concerning Thankyou so much for your appropriate review. You're Awesome! I'll respond in kind. Love you to me 2 days ago Details You have an answer for everything don't you. Good bye

7.

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Tagged: broken arm , frustrating , FAIL , owner , annoying , email , customers , client , business , funny , stupid , funny fails

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Bridezilla Worried Bridesmaid's Chemotherapy Will Ruin Wedding

This bridezilla just soared to the top of delusional and terribly toxic individuals that we've seen involved in weddings. Yikes. Apparently the bride was worried about the bridesmaid in this scenario, ruining her wedding day because of her chemotherapy, and hair loss. You've got to be kidding me.

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Text - Hey girls I have something I need to run by y'all. So Mader didn't have cancer whenl invited her to be my bridesmaid but now I'm having second thoughts about her being in the wedding. Like, she mentioned the other day that her hair has started to fall out a bit and I noticed that it was looking thinner than normal. I just can't

2.

Text - envision having all you beautiful ladies up there with me looking fabulous and then Mader with no hair. I just feel like itll distract from me and and I just feel it won't fit with the look l'm going for. Do you think I could ask her to wear a wig? Or should I tell her I don't think she should be a bridesmaid anymore? Help lol Wtf, are you serious right now???

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Text - I will no longer Hey be attending your wedding as a bridesmaid or guest. It has come to my attention that you are concerned about me potentially losing my hair and how that will affect the "aesthetic" of your wedding/ photos/vibe. I would just HATE for my chemotherapy treatment and the resulting side effects to

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Text - and the resulting side effects to negatively affect you and your wedding day so I will not be attending. Apparently I really should have read the fine print on my chemotherapy treatments because I read about the expected side effects of nausea, exhaustion, neuropathy, etc. but I somehow missed the mention that it would cause my "friend" to become such an insensitive, self-centered and heartless douchebaggette.

5.

Text - Did stell you? I really didn't mean it in a negative way! I just wasn't expecting you to get cancer and lose your hair when I asked you to be my bridesmaid and now its hard to see that with my vision of my wedding day. I've been dreaming about this day since I was a little girl and I've always had a vision of what it would look like and the photos to

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Text - remember it by. I'd be totally fine with you wearing a wig! Could make a day of it and go shopping for one Or you could at least still attend the wedding as my guest. It would mean the world to me to have you there! OMG, you are so right! I can't imagine how unexpected it must have been for YOU to find out that I had cancer. How selfish of me and my hair to not consider that. I will certainly sit down with my rapidly depleting

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Text - realize what it was doing to your vision for your wedding. And thank you for being totally fine with me wearing a wig, that's just so gosh darn considerate of you, maybe I can get a clown wig to match your delusional ass. But instead of making a day out of wig shopping, I propose that instead we make a day of you walking barefoot across an endless sea of legos. And I would hate to have my shiny

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Text - bald, Mr. Clean head, take away from your amazing day in any way as a guest. And besides,I have a psychic who has enquired about using my head that day as a crystal ball so booked pretty solid . Though I will miss the opportunity to chemo-vomit in your bouquet, this is me officially RSVPing- Not attending on account of you being a soggy pop tart. Delivered

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Text - enquired about using my head that day as a crystal ball so booked pretty solid. Though I will miss the opportunity to chemo-vomit in your bouquet, this is me officially RSVPing- Not attending on account of you being a soggy pop tart. Please don't be like this. I really didn't mean it in a mean way, just being honest. I'd really like for you to be there for my big day

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Text - Of the 2 people in this conversation who need to re- evaluate the way they're acting, I'm certainly not it. I sincerely hope that every future shopping cart that you push has that one rogue wheel. May your pillow never be cold when you flip it over and let the strings on your hoodies be forever uneven. Goodnight Delivered

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Tagged: bride , FAIL , Crazy Brides , mean , wedding , ridiculous , texting , rude

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Attempts That Got Caught Up In the Net of Failure

People are constantly caught up in an attempt to do something. Some people are trying to be complimentary or look smart. Some people are trying to re-frame news or look younger. Every attempt might hit the ground with the sound of failure. Whatever people try to do, their attempt might stumble into a pile of fail.

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Scientific instrument - Troy Leon Gregg, a death row inmate in Georgia, escaped the night before his execution only to be killed in a bar fight that very same night.

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Text - jordan O @JordanUhl Budweiser just spent $5 million on a commercial to brag about donating $100K worth of water. 8:49 PM · 04 Feb 18 1,789 Retweets 4,400 Likes

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Text - 88% ul AT&T ? 00:35 officialunitedstates things I know about brazil: • jungle • jesus statue hetaliagirl104 The Jesus is statue is in Rio, you uneducated swine officialunitedstates Equator BRAZIL Rio de Janeiro Tropic of Capricorn

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Text - Stan Lee was a bigot. He said Peter Parker could never be gay. So, stop with this Stan Lee worshiping. He not only refused to make spiderman queer, he also stated that Spiderman should never be gay. If you continue to idolize him, then you are just as bad. fangirlforallfandoms He said Peter Parker shouldn't be gay because the character wasn't written with the intention to be queer. There is more to LGBTQ+ inclusion that just queerwashing already established non-queer characters. And also,

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Text - Jen J A @capital_crab TOWN HAI My landlord wants to play but he picked the wrong tenant. IT IS YOUR RESPONSIBILITY 2m d actually under Nyc's housing maintenance code, subchapter 2, article 4 the landlord is legally obligated to eradicate bedbugs 1m 3:19 PM · 19 Dec 19 · Twitter Web App

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Text - Katie Mack @Astrokatie 15h Honestly climate change scares the heck out of me and it makes me so sad to see what we're losing because of it. 17 29 122 Gary P Jackson (RAT) @gary4205 @Astrokatie Maybe you should learn some actual SCIENCE then, and stop listening to the criminals pushing the #GlobalWarming SCAM! 7h 17 7 t3 Katie McGarvey Retweeted Katie Mack @Astrokatie @gary42051 dunno, man, I already went and got a PhD in astrophysics. Seems like more than that would be overkill at this po

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Text - grant @reydior 1d Billie Eilish turned 18 today and is already the top search on PornHub. waiting until a child if of age to start searching for pics and vids of her to masturbate to does not make you any less of a creepy weird fuck. stop sexualizing teenagers and children you sick fucks O 271K 9 1,029 2767.4K Pornhub ARIA O Porn hub @Pornhub Replying to @reydior This is not true. 11:42 AM 12/19/19 · Twitter for Android

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Text - Dan Broadbent @aSciEnthusiast Because the melting point of gold is 1064°C and a wood fire burns at around 600°C 18h After all the aftermath and destruction of the Notre Dame fire, the alter and cross remained untouched. Please explain to me how you don't believe in God after seeing this. 4:56 PM · 16 Apr 19 · Twitter for Android Dan Broadbent @aSciEnthusiast 1200° Fahrenheit is 650° Celsius, professor plying to @aSciEnthusiast Dan, you're a dumbass. That fire was probably burning at betwe

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Text - Tweet 6h v White person: haha I love the sopranos :) I love when the Italian clowns say "gabagool" haha :) that's do funny. Italian people are like clowns to me :) they exist for my white entertainment :) dance Italian clown :) dance for me :) O 88 O 2,748 27 288 man 5 DISCO AS F. mes Replying to I'm sorry to have to tell you this but. Italians are white 6:19 AM - 12/27/19 - Twitter for Android

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Text - When your joke backfires and you accidentally advance women's rights: HISTORY HUSTLE In 1887, a group of men added a woman named Susanna Salter to a mayoral ballot as a joke intended to humiliate women. Instead, she won over 60% of the vote and became America's first female mayor.

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Text - KILA KTLA 5 @KTLA A 5-year-old girl in Vista sold hot cocoa and cookies to pay the lunch debt of 123 students zoë a. @zoeasombra What is more heartwarming than a story about child labor helping 5 year olds pay off debt

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Natural environment - Vegas 420 • 6 hours ago I remember watching part one in theaters and I was holding a fart in, so I tried to let it out when I saw the monsters thinking it was going to be loud but it was a scene from the deaf girls point of view in silence and everybody heard it E 18 308 18 replies

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Text - "Well, there's no circle thingy with the slash through it, so I guess it's okay."

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Text - Studying an IT related course You? Tuesday 20:2o Pure chemistry Tuesday 21:00 That's awesome I tried telling a chemistry joke once, but i got no reaction Today 14:45 Haha what's the joke ?? May be I might understand it

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Text - Feb 14 at 2:47pm e Today my son Ethan came home with another homework from his wacko teacher. According to his teacher, we are all supposed to be "homosapiens". Lady you know nothing about Science I tell you what. There are people out there who consider themselves to be heterosapiens just like me and billions of people around the world. That lady sure is dumb. Just because she's one of them Lady Boys from Thailand doesn't mean we are all homosexuals. First thing tomorrow is giving that la

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Skin - @heckoffsupreme This woman got stuck in her bathtub for 30 minutes after bathing in coconut oil 'There is no traction. No grip. Just me and my fat body slipping around covered in oil.'»

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Christmas tree - Jesse Why do you have a framed picture of your ceiling fan? December 2 at 6:01 PM Like 63 Jesse December 2 at 6:01 PM Like Jesse I realize that is a mirror. December 2 at 6:01 PM- Like

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Text - My girlfriend is currently crying because she thought the $70 she wanted to spend on "adopting" a koala bear from the Australian brush fires was actually going to physically get her a koala bear. Like they would just Fedex that shit to us, and not just her become a sponsor. 8:32 PM 03 Jan 20 from Texas, USA Twitter for iPhone 28.5K Retweets 293K Likes

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Violet - Asia.Tingz @ AsianDreams Wtf is this? Frank Lotion @702Austin Its called do what you can to make your child happy

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Text - Anonymous 02/16/15(Mon)16:25:28 No.598678240 Making a plant illegal is like saying God was wrong Report >>598678572 # Anonymous 02/16/15(Mon)16:26:55 No.598678572 >>598678240 # Making a plant illegal was one of the first things God ever did... Report

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Text - Buckles and Bulls BULLS @BucklesandBulls 101-Year-Old Veteran Says Cold Coors Light Is The Secret To Long Life dlvr.it/ QszQKr Samuel Adams Beer @SamuelAdamsBeer Everyone already knows water is e good for you Imfao

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Transport - Anúncio Anúncio Ford 8791 НYO 8 Pick-up ano 77 Pick-up ano 77 R$35.000 R$35.000 24 outubro 19:20 24 outubro 19:20 O Granja Portugal - Fortaleza - Ceará O Granja Portugal - Fortaleza - Ceará Categoria Categoria Carros Carros

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Playground slide - niną @glocknina Who remembers these mfs? TYO OTODAY cole míller @C_millz6 who the fuck forgot slides

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Rock - The Moon is not a rock in space The Moon is it's own light source ROCKS DON'T REFLECT LIGHT NEITHER DOES THE MOON 12:17 AM 18.12.2019 Twitter Web App 66 Retweets 266 Likes 1 Cannonballer1 911 points - 2 hours ago I like how you can clearly see the rock reflecting light , Reply Give Award Share Report Save

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Tagged: failure , FAIL , jokes , internet , facepalm , Memes , attempt , dumb , funny , stupid

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Dumb Questions People Were Asked

Sometimes we're just not thinking and sometimes people are really just flat-out stupid. There are a lot of really dumb questions that get asked. People have almost too many stories about dumb things people said to have their intelligence questioned.

1.

Text - Firethorn101 116 points · 22 hours ago "What did people in apartments do before stairs were invented?" "Is kingdom come a place in China?" Same person.

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Text - OtisLoom 109 points · 22 hours ago Lost in a new city, I stopped to ask directions. "I'm trying to locate the on-ramp to the westbound interstate, "I asked. The guy asked me, "Where are you starting from?"

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Text - SwimminAss 101 points · 20 hours ago "Are lizards animals?" This was a highschool senior. They weren't joking

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Text - Marise20 94 points · 22 hours ago I was at the main desk of the library I worked in at the time. I picked up the phone and the caller asked, with no preamble or context, "Is this the library down the street?"

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Text - LilyAllen10 81 points · 22 hours ago Having dinner in the dining hall at University. A friend asks me 'How big is a star? Could one fit in this room? I quietly let her know that one would probably not fit in the room...

6.

Text - moe_skweeto 1.9k points · 1 day ago *trying to move one of those big, multi purpose weight machines, and they noticed it's set to its heaviest setting* "Why don't we set it to its lightest setting so it'll be lighter?" To their credit, they realized about ten seconds later why that was a dumb question.

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Text - RuinEleint 1.2k points · 22 hours ago I am quite tall in comparison to the average height of where I live. A coworker: "Don't you think you are being a bit inconsiderate, being so tall?" I still don't know what they were trying to say

8.

Text - GuardPerson 1.1k points · 23 hours ago A: where can in find a security guard? Me: Security is located in the pavilion over there. They can be reached 24 hours a day. A: What if I need them at night?

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Text - throwaway6571265712 907 points · 23 hours ago I used to work in retail when I was 16. I was cashiering when a woman came up and gave me a coupon for 20% off the total purchase. When I told her the total she seemed displeased and asked me, "did it take 20% each item or the entire total?" And I had to desperately explain to her that it's the exact same thing.

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Text - saucy_awesome 642 points · 22 hours ago Customer buying a bottle of water at a coffee shop: "Is this real water?"

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Text - Hailene2092 589 points · 22 hours ago I was talking to someone and mentioned that I had visited Japan the previous year. "Oh, is that where Japanese people come from?" I was taken aback for like 3 seconds before I stammered out a yeah.

12.

Text - havensal 555 points · 23 hours ago Was the IT admin for a small company at the time. The power went out, as happens occasionally. The secretary rang my phone and asked me if the phones were working. She did not say she was testing to see, but asked if they were working. over. the. phone.

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Text - toothpastenachos 499 points · 22 hours ago I was the one asking the stupid question. When I was like 12 I was at a taco food truck at the county fair and my options were either a shrimp or chicken taco. I meant to ask "is there a difference in price" because the fair always gets ya and instead I only said "what's the difference?" The lady said "Well one's shrimp and one's chicken." And I felt stupid.

14.

Text - Yoliwankenobi12 489 points · 23 hours ago When someone asked me where I'm from and I said "Venezuela" their response was "what part of Africa that in?"

15.

Text - AhmeBob 351 points · 23 hours ago Working in a bar with an upstairs and downstairs, one of the new waiting staff at the end of the night during clean up asked me if she should sweep the dirt up or down the stairs. I said up the stairs and left her to it.

16.

Text - labbykun 294 points · 21 hours ago My friend and I went to a gas station while out cruising around and she bought some munchies. She put a five on the counter and the cashier stared down at it like she'd never seen such a thing exist, and asked, without moving.. "Is that a 5?" To this day I have no idea why she was so flummoxed by a five dollar bill sitting next to her cash register.

17.

Text - Kabufu 289 points · 21 hours ago "Is okay to swim with a dead dog in the pool?" -Phone call I took while working at a pool store. And no. No, it is not okay to swimming with a dead dog in the pool.

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Text - M1XRR 267 points · 21 hours ago I was born on an AirForce base. I remember in school one day we were doing one of those about you things that the teachers always assign on the first day and I put the base I was born on in the spot that asks where you're born. We then share it to the class (6th grade) and some kid dead serious asked me "so if you were born on an AirForce base were you born on the runway or something?" *The base had a hospital and my dad was active duty when I was born that

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Text - Canpede 217 points · 1 day ago · edited 15 hours ago A friend asked stupid question to a Scottish man while we were on holiday from Canada. We were watching a boat go through a lock. Him to Scottish guy: which way do the boats go through the lock? Scottish guy: which way is the boat pointed? Him: good point.

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Text - berly456 183 points · 22 hours ago I have been asked many times "are you identical?" when telling someone I (a girl) have a twin brother. Well.. No. I have also been asked when his birthday is when discussing my birthday.

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Text - stopstealingmyname 149 points · 20 hours ago "What are eggs made of?". Not like chemical make up, but if they had flour in them. Cause of the whites. If they had butter in them. Cause of the yolk. This kid (23 y/o) was a box of bricks.

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Text - Drowsiest_Approval 128 points · 23 hours ago "Where do you find the calorie info on shampoo? I can't find it."

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Text - room32a 123 points · 21 hours ago My mom asked me if Florida is in California. We're Canadian and she's been to both states.

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Tagged: overheard , FAIL , funny stories , dumb people , dumb , idiots , stories , questions , funny , stupid

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Comedy Gold From The Antiques Roadshow

Shoutout to @KeatonPatti for the beautiful work on the captions with these various treasures from the antiques roadshow. They're absolutely inaccurate, but still seem like they could be on point at the same time. Now that is art.

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Event - 42 PRINTS& OTO IS, PAINTI DRAWI Coat That If Touched Loses All Value $0-$0 AR

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First Openly Gay Vase $7,000-$10,000 FAR

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Games - Doll That Will Kill Again $600-$700 AR @KeatonPatti

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Footwear - First Draft of Air Jordans AR $7,000-$8,000 @KeatonPatti

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Eual World's Worst Umbrella AR $20-$50 @KeatonPatti

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Games - Just Normal Things $5,000-$7,000 AR OKeatonPati

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Hot air balloon - Loud Flower $2,000-$5,000 AR @KeatonPatti

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Musical instrument - * ** INSTRUMENTS Cool Old Lady w/ Sad Kid AR $18,000-$20,000 @KeatonPatti

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Basque rural sports - The First Ever Uber $7,000-$8,000 AR @KeatonPatti

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Metal - Adam & Eve's Pizza Cutters $7,000-$9,000 AR @KeatonPatti

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Photo caption - Swan Just Learning it's a Vase AR $2,000-$4,000 QKeatonPatti

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Speech - JEWELRY Either of These Things $50-$75 AR @KeatonPatti

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Bell - Only Photo of The Authentic Taco Bell $22,000-$25,000 AR @KeatonPatti

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Dinosaur - The Worst Owl $18,000-$20,000 AR

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Portrait - I Can't Paint Necks (1885) $2,000-$4,000 AR @KeatonPatti

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Musical instrument - Bowl Jesus Threw Up In Twice $40,000-$55,000 FAR

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Headgear - The Worst Thing We Could Find $0.05-$0.06 AR @KeatonPatti

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Statue - Sassiest Statue On Earth (You Can't Afford It, Honey) AR @KeatonPatti

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Nose - Oy, Mista! You Me Dad? Doll $40-$70 AR @KeatonPatti

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$Banner - Prints RS PROTOGRAPHS ... SPORT\ COL CIE TINL Camera Guy We Fired $10-$15 AR @KeatonPatti$

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Painting - l'll Finish This Later (1973) $400-$800 AR @KeatonPatti

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Pope - Chicken Man's Dress $4,000-$6,000 VAR @KeatonPatti

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World - Statue That Just Found Out It's A Statue $15,000-$20,000 AR

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"Fresh" Lettuce from Subway $0.25-$0.35 TAR QKeatonPatti

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Tagged: humor , shopping , clever , ridiculous , auction , funny , witty reply

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When People Realized Their Boss Was Dumb

It can be really frustrating to realize your boss is a goddamn moron. Some bosses are just good at hiding the fact that they have no idea what they're doing, but some are not quite so good. Don't get us wrong, many bosses are competent, but these ones really let the stupid cat out of the idiot bag.

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Text - Peregrine2976 2.7k points · 5 days ago Dropped a ton of cash renting art from a museum's art bank for our (decrepit Chinatown) office. Then didn't have money to pay salaries.

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Text - davidmitchellseyes 2.6k points · 5 days ago When they fired the woman who did HR (she wasn't qualified for it, and had no training to do it so whatever), and I overheard the owner/boss have this conversation with a co-worker. Boss: "So, what is HR anyway?" Co-Worker: "Human Resources" B: "Yeah, but, like, what do they do?" CW: "Well, they take care of employee conflicts, deal with internal complaints, stuff like that" B: "Well, we don't need that. Besides, you can do that" So now we don't

3.

Text - TheMonkeyMen 1.9k points · 5 days ago I told my boss since he wouldn't listen to me we needed an industrial engineer to make our dept/machine more efficient. He said, “no way in hell are we bringing in an engineer." 3 weeks later my company hired an engineer and when they came to our Dept the engineer asked him what he wanted to do differently he froze turned and said, "welI let's go talk to Themonkeymen he's worked here a long time he knows what needs to be done." ... this boss makes at

4.

Text - Unweededgarden 1.8k points · 5 days ago After the third time he drove a powerdrill through his hand...

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Text - Queen_lucya 1.6k points · 5 days ago Once I told my boss I was 1/3 done with the work I had to do He said "well you better hurry the others said they has finishes 1/6 of the work" He walked away and I just stared at him for a few seconds

6.

Text - Axl_Bundy 1.4k points · 5 days ago The time he got really bitchy/passive aggressive a few months after he hired me which finally boiled over when he got mad and said "I HIRED YOU BECUASE I THOUGHT YOU WERE GOING TO RUN THIS COMPANY FOR ME!" I'm a graphic designer by the way.

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$Text - LeftChoux 1.3k points · 5 days ago My boss thinks he is a programmer. (SQL) He told me he did not like that I have one table that contains both active and inactive computers with a field that indicates active\inactive and told me (demanded) tha I should create 2 tables one for each computer state.$

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Text - Lufernaal 1.2k points · 5 days ago Asks me to do stuff that helps no one or makes nothing better. He has us doing stuff that he literally can't explain why.

9.

Text - birb_in_disguise 1.1k points · 4 days ago · edit My manager (woman who's in nursing school) thought that women were pregnant for 12 months.

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Text - aRationalShill 969 points · 4 days ago I write ": )" on papers I grade for a professor. He accused me of writing slurs in my native language even though it's just a fucking smiley face.

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Text - necrocripple 847 points · 4 days ago My manager told me to mop the breakroom floor. I did. She freaked out that it was slippery (two seconds after I was done).

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Text - donutshopsss 639 points · 5 days ago I did business with company A while working at company B. Company A offered me a job because they liked how I operated. I went through an extensive interview process, they said I was great, they had my resume, knew my experience and specialties, what I was capable of, etc. After a few weeks they kept telling me "you need a degree in electrical engineering to understand this" when they knew I had no understanding of electrical engineering and left that

13.

Text - Lauer99 619 points · 4 days ago When he told me instead of taking my new higher paying job I should just work more hours at my current one for him.

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Text - TheRealWookyMonster 612 points · 5 days ago When she told me I should have no problem with this new task because "it's not rocket scientist". Also, she says "pacifically". O

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Text - InfiniteElway 546 points · 4 days ago Teacher Had an admin who was a Basketball coach and ISS teacher for his whole career. Got his masters online while in the ISS room Came in one day, saw me teaching, got mad a kid was in the back not paying attention. 'We gotta get everyone infinitelway!" '33 of 34 kids in this room are passing Geometry, my room is the only one that kid hasnt been kicked out multiple times this year, and he is nice and polite in here.' "Doesnt matter! He needs to take

16.

Text - adeiner 486 points · 4 days ago I had a boss once who refused to register to vote because she didn't want jury duty and then got jury duty because that's not the only way they pick. She ended up serving for a week.

17.

Text - forumdestroyer156 473 points · 5 days ago She has no idea about basic 101 things related to our industry that a fresh intern could demonstrate on the spot. Now, every job I do I have to explain from the beginning what it is, why we're doing it and why it's important. She nods, makes an "insightful" comment, then forgets it completely. I'm the only one on my team with actual experience in certain areas, and naturally have to do all the work in those areas. When it comes time for the credit

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Text - sleepingbeardune 471 points ·4 days ago I was a 20-something woman in a Mormon-owned company with a lot of branches. All the bosses were guys and all the office workers were women, and I was an anomaly ... from out of state, not Mormon, educated in math, neither boss nor secretary. Before this, I'd only had waitress jobs. So I was in a lot of meetings with all the guys in their nice suits, excited to be allowed to do real work. It was like, 1980. It took about 10 minutes of the first meet

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Text - kingslayer_07 402 points · 5 days ago When he keeps asking me why the inventory looks "dirty" (physically dirty) and doesn't care about the accuracy of it. My job doesn't even have anything to do with the warehouse. I'm an ops analyst

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Text - fievelm 373 points · 4 days ago I used to do computer repair. New boss was hired, and it started to become obvious she knew nothing about computers. Every morning she'd ask me what I was going to do for the day, then repeat back what I said as an order. I told the receptionist about this, and she told me I was probably just overreacting. Then one morning the receptionist was in the repair room and witnessed this exchange: Boss: Fievelm, what are you working on? Me: I'm installing Windows

21.

Text - FoleyX90 315 points · 4 days ago When I created functions for similar procedures instead of copying & pasting the exact same code & modifying it in various spots throughout the program. "What if we hire a developer that doesn't know how to use functions?" Then we shouldn't have fucking hired them.

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Text - thisisntrealnope 325 points · 5 days ago Boss at a pool was proud that she managed to convince the health inspector to let us stay open when the chlorine levels were well over the allowed amount

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Tagged: frustrating , manager , FAIL , funny stories , annoying , bosses , work , employees , lol , dumb , idiots , stories , stupid

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Guy Hides Inheritance Money From Girlfriend

This guy asked the people of Reddit whether or not he was in the wrong for hiding his inheritance money from his girlfriend and her family. The tough part about this particular predicament is that they had a kid together. A fair number of people are suggesting that the guy should try to be transparent when it comes to those finances.

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Text - AITA for hiding the 135k I just inherited from my girlfriend and her family? No A-holes here Context: My girlfriend(22) and | (23) just had our first child a few months ago. The pregnancy was wildly unplanned as I am graduate school and neither of us were ever interested in children. About a year ago I learned that I was set to inherit over $135k from my great aunts estate who, due to severe schizophrenia, never married or had any children. She was a wealthy woman because of her father, a

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Text - Right around the time I learned about this money my girlfriends family got in severe financial trouble which prevented her from finishing college.Then came pregnancy and our child. I have supported her and our child completely with this money but she has no idea where it is coming from and doesn't really push too hard to find out. I don't really have plans to tell her, and I sure as hell don't want her Dad finding out as l'm sure it will eventually lead to him asking for money for another

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Text - k2dadub • 5d • Professor Emeritass [80] NAH- if your relationship structure consists of you paying for everything no questions asked, then I can't see what you are doing wrong. Hopefully you are earning a graduate degree is something that will earn you a real salary, as this money won't last for too many years supporting a family of three.

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Text - ArishaSmile • 5d • Partassipant [1] NAH But it's a little concerning that you don't feel you can trust your girlfriend with this information. Depending on the seriousness of the relationship, you want to be able to be honest and communicate without secrets between you.

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Text - torisnowbunny • 5d • Partassipant [4] 3 2 Awards Neither her nor her family are entitled to money YOU'VE inherited. Edit: Can't reply to all of you replying but 1.) They're not married, he isn't legally obliged to disclose his inheritance unless in court. 2.) He is using the money to finance the child.

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Text - psychodogcat • 5d Bro...you have a kid with them. Obviously you can do this if you want, withholding it from your girlfriend, but she gave fucking birth. That's tough. If you want to have a future with this person, tell them. Tell your girlfriend, and be honest. Not just about hiding it or whatever, but also that 135k can go very quick. If you are giving it to anyone outside immediate family, it'll be gone within 5 years. Not the asshole, but you could be if you don't tell her. I don't se

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Text - BasedSunny • 5d YTA honestly. I don't see why you lied to your SO about this, l'd be pissed if my partner kept something like this from me. Not because I feel I'm entitled to the money, but because he feels I am so untrustworthy that he has to lie about it. If she finds out about this, and she will, you're fucked.

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Text - thelastanonymouse • 5d • Certified Proctologist [23] YTA for hiding this from your girlfriend (who is the mother of your child). Not the asshole for hiding it from her famly.

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Text - -Starwind • 5d The money is yours, obviously, but the fact that you don't seem to trust your GF (who you say you're very serious with) speaks about issues down the line. Be open with her, ask her to not tell anyone. Eventually she's going to wonder how you never miss a car payment or whatever.

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Text - Csherman92 • 5d YTA. If you can't trust your girlfriend then you shouldn't be in a relationship with her or have had a child with her. You cannot have a successful relationship without trust and communication. Do I think the family needs to know? No. But your girlfriend does. She is the mother of your child and she is part of your family now. If you don't think she is, then don't continue this relationship.

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Text - StoleMyPimento • 5d • Asshole Aficionado [12] NAH But if I have to add if neither you nor your girlfriend were using birth control, it wasn't a wildly unplanned pregnancy.

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Text - wobblebase • 5d • Professor Emeritass [90] YTA if you hide the money and stay with your GF. You're having a kid together, unplanned but there you are. If you can be partners and coparents it's time to reassess the relationship.

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Tagged: aita , finance , family , reaction , Reddit , money

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Times The Written Word Crushed People Online

We're back at it again with a fresh collection of people getting absolutely crushed by words. Sometimes people just nail it with the comeback or the insult to such an extent that there's really no coming back from it. A whole lot of this wreckage could've been avoided if people didn't act a fool to begin with.

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Text - | 5.1k points · • Not been bothering with Reddit over Xmas; but it's nice to come back to an early nominee for "stupidest post of the year", especially so early on. Let me check I've got this straight: You were planning on proposing to a work colleague when you go on holiday, despite the fact you are still seeing someone you class as your girlfriend. However, in a twist of fate, you took that engagement ring out with you on New Years Eve. Either that, or you took the wrong girlfriend out.

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Text - ME I will do I also got you a present x LIV Ou what you get x ME Me I'm your present x LIV Did you keep the receipt so I can return it ?

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Text - fishingballer12 Imagine being gay enough to wear a helmet while skateboarding 13h 61 likes Reply Hide replies tonyhawk e @fishingballer12 imagine it being mandatory when you were young, and then imagine skating into your 50's without a TBI... or being homophobic. Oh wait, you can't. Reply 12h 4,471 likes

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Text - Tom Anderson @myspacetom 2h People keep asking, so l'll say it: fear over Instagram's terms change is ridiculous... Get real folks! 2h @myspacetom says the guys that was not able to keep a social network alive Tom Anderson @myspacetom says the guy who sold myspace in 2005 for $580 million while you slave away hoping for a half-day off

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Text - u-kill-me-in-a-good-way violettesilence jesuislegrandefromage montypythonandtheholyblog: hotdamnope kangiku: the 12 year olds on this website get really mad if you point out the fact that they're 12 ru serious NOT EVERY 12 OLD GETS REALLY ANGRY jesues sometimes people are just so dumb ughh this is almost as fun as playing spot the vegan. Spot the vegan? Yeah.. the vegan is the one who isn't killing or harming animals just because "They taste good." Found the vegan.

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Text - J.K. Rowling @jk_rowling *sighs* Well, who knows? If I try harder, I might be reincarnated as a lonely virgin hiding behind a cartoon frog. @FrogulusPepe 1m Frogulus Pepe Quote very fitting to @realDonald Trump. He stands up for something very very good and you are his enemy Mrs Shitty Writer. J.K. Rowling @jk_rowling "You have enemies? Good. That means you've stood up for something, sometime in your life." -- Winston Churchill

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Text - YOU MATCHED WIT ON 11/9/19 D11 My bad I thought this was a vending machine cause you look like a snack Today 9:27 PM C4. My bad. I thought this was Battleship cause that line was a miss. AtomCentral.com רוא:f150w Sent

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Text - 13h v Replying to @nathanwpyle Then again, the country that doesn't use the metric system is the only one to have landed men on the moon, so... :D 6 16 13h About that, NASA uses the lo gical system and the only time someone tried to use the Imperial for space they ended up crashing in Mars.

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Text - * 3 months ago Apparently this burger king has a total capacity of two concurrent orders before the entire system collapses in total chaos. Watching their staff put their heads together to attempt what to most people would be the equivalent of working out what number comes after 4 brings back some deep ancestral memory of cavemen banging rocks together to create fire. I'm convinced this was a part of some plot to encourage healthy eating by removing the fast from fast food. ...

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Text - "You haven't made a movie, so you can't judge movies." I'm sorry, whatcha say? How is this still an argument? You don't need to be a chef to say a meal is bad. Same reason you don't need to be a filmmaker to say a film is bad. Stupid take, Jason. + DiscussingFilm @Discus... 8h Jason Derulo on the 'CATS' backlash: "It's an incredible piece of art by some of the best people in the world. I am excited for people to actually see it because reviewers, what the hell do they know? Have they ever

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Text - No there aren't enough women in the STEM fields because of misogyny Like Reply 9 mins Do you by chance have a background in gender studies? Like Reply 9 mins IThats noone of your business Like Reply 7 mins Edited Seriously, I was wondering if you do because your education might shed some light on why you think misogyny is the reason more women aren't in STEM. Like Reply 6 mins |Yes I have a degree in women's studies Like Reply 6 mins Then why did you take women's studies when you could ha

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Text - In replv to Wendv's SL3NE -1d @Wendys your adopted you fucker Wendy's O @Wendys · 1d First, it's you're. Second, while Wendy wasn't adopted, her father Dave was. That's why the Dave Thomas Foundation for Adoption was his passion Despite your attempt to use it as an insult, many lives are made better through the adoption process. 274 28

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Sky - B.o.B + Follow @bobatl The cities in the background are approx. 16miles apart... where is the curve ? please explain this

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Text - KTLA KTLA O 5) @KTLA A 5-year-old girl in Vista sold hot cOcoa and cookies to pay the lunch debt of 123 students zoë a. @zoeasombra What is more heartwarming thana story about child labor helping 5 year olds pay off debt

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Text - Kimberly Ross O @SouthernKeeks · 1d In a just society, Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez would still be a bartender... O 2,204 271,769 10.3K Barry Schapiro MD @bschapiroMD Replying to @SouthernKeeks I was a bartender before I went to medical school. It was a time that I look back on fondly. I learned many important life skills including empathy, teamwork, and effective time management. Nobody should judge another's journey. It makes you look petty. Really.

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Tagged: ouch , twitter , online , banter , mean , facebook , social media , ridiculous , insult , brutal

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Entertaining Nuggets Of Comedy Gold From Tumblr

Ah, good old Tumblr. It's a maze of people getting real meticulous and obsessive when it comes to overanalyzing movies, tv shows, and other facets of life. Never know what kind of wisdom you might come across while you're exploring the ins and outs of Tumblr.

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Text - mbrainspaz OPA I really enjoy just existing in hotels. The long identical hallways. The soulless abstract art. The weird noises the air-conditioner makes. Strange city lights in the window. Six stories off the ground. Strangers chatting in the hall. Nothing in the dresser. No past, but an infinite present. sushinfood Finally, Someone Understands

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Text - ndiecity My local rock station You're listening to rock. Fucking rock. We're hard as shit. All the other stations are whimpy little snowflakes for not playing rock like we do. Hard rock. Rock and metal and fucking rock. Up next is Twenty One Pilots followed by Imagine Dragons

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Text - graynard talking to my infant son like im a youtuber looking4myson Whats up baby. Father here bringing you another spoonful of Gerber ham and gravy baby food

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Text - doctors before an x-ray be like "dont worry this is perfectly safe" and then the dude goes to egypt to press a button twinkcommunist In case anyone's wondering is because getting an x ray once is so barely harmful that it rounds to zero but standing in front of an x ray emitter 40 hours a week for years will definitely kill you iridepigs If I go to the bar and have one drink with the bartender l'll be fine. If the bartender has a drink with every patron then they will die

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Text - olofahere Do not punish the behaviour you want to see I mean, it seems pretty obvious when you put it like that, right? But how many families, when an introvert sibling or child makes an effort to socialize, snarkily say, "So, you've decided to join us"? Or when someone does something they've had trouble doing, say, "Why can't you do that all the time?" (Happened to me, too often.) Or any sentence containing the word "finally". If someone makes a step, a small step, in a direction you wan

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Text - help-mywife Help, my girlfriend calls Red Dead Redemption "Redededemption" and also insists that that's the name of the main character pecawn her mind is far more advanced than yours will ever be

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Text - bloglikeanegyptian a jurassic park game where you “build your own park" and you think the game is about building the best park with the most amount of dinosaurs and everything is running well and it goes from cloning the dinosaur all the way to putting them in the right paddock then when you've finished and the credits roll the screen goes black and it starts blaring an alarm and all the dinosaurs escape and now you're playing a first person POV-game escaping from all the dinosaurs you he

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Text - laskulls normal ocean creatures: ah. viva la sea. the blue, it is harsh but it is my love. i am a magnificent creature in a magical place the deep ocean weirdos: i don't need oxygen to survive. i haven't eaten since the fall of byzantium. i have 300 eyes on my eyeballs. its been 14000 years since l've bumped into another life form. I'll kick anything's ass. nothing can kill me not even death

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Text - REI tilthat TIL To create the battles for Lord of the Rings, Weta used a program called MASSIVE & was able to create thousands of CG soldiers, give them artificial intelligence, talents, and skills, then just let them fight. The Al worked so well that some of the soldiers assessed the battle and fled. via reddit.com froody artificial cowardice

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Text - thunderthightning-deactivated20 i was playing scrabble and i had a B, U, R, G, E, and R and i thought “aha burger, one who burgs, but my mom will never accept that as a word" but then i remembered burger is actually a word lifewasted one time I played the word "am" and I thought, they can totally let that slide because of AM radio and A.M time. then i remembered undefindatawsome Scrabble does things to your mind that you can never come back from.

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Joint - helladutchess: shrekyourself: they put a bee in a human hospital bed "Sorry sir we have no more beds left." "What about that one?" "Oh that's a Bee's"

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Text - methlabrador Itd be funny as fuck if the world operated like how people with social anxiety think it does. Like what if you got on a bus and everyone was like wow look at that piece of shit loser. Get off the bus you ugly bastard a sapphic-sunny thats just middle school

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Text - Heres the thing you gotta understand about statistics. "Increases your chances by 80%" does not mean "there is now an 80% chance". If your chances were previously 10%, your chances are now 18%, not 90%. if your chances were roughly 1%, they're now just slightly less than 2%. thats how that works. hopeful-weirdo Wow I don't understand math at all anchirotleep 'if you have a baby after 35, the chance of deformities goes up by 100%' is a line I hear alot. It goes up from .5% to 1% working-cl

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Text - Waiter: How did you find your meal, sir? Me: Yeah, it was nice. Waiter: That's not what I meant and you know it. Me: Another waiter told me where you hid it. towritelesbiansonherarms this cracked me up more than i think it should have

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Text - lesbuchanan Summer Olympics: Who can run the fastest? :) Who can swim the fastest? :) Who can do the best somersault? :) Winter Olympics: WHO CAN MAKE IT TO THE BOTTOM OF THIS ICE SLIDE OF DEATH AND SURVIVE?? WHO CAN GET AROUND THE RINK WITHOUT GETTING THEIR HANDS SLICED OFF BY EVERYONE ELSE'S FEET BLADES?? CAN THIS GUY DO A 1080 DEGREE FLIP WITHOUT DYING?? legionoftuna Summer Triathlon: Don't run too fast, you have to save your energy for a swim and a bike ride! :) Winter Biathlon: I see

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Text - evilrick: evilrick: I love all 5 of my followers tbh evilrick I love all 5 of my followers tbh 5 notes 5 notes the gangs all here

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Tagged: humor , tumblr , commentary , social media , ridiculous , funny

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Guy Outsmarts His Worst Customer Ever

This guy tells the story of how he managed to keep a cool temper (thanks to his wife), and go on to outsmart what was arguably his worst customer of all time. Fair to say that this choosing beggar got so destroyed by this pro revenge that there's no way he'll think about trying his scam on someone else anytime soon!

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Black - STAR WARS STAR WARS STAR WARS STAR WARS STAR WARS STAR ARS STAR WA STAR WARS STAR HARS

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Text - My worst customer ever....ever-er Cunty McFuckface So almost a couple of years ago I had a guy that emailed me back and forth for months. He was pretty cool but picky beyond belief and couldn't decide on what he wanted. Finally though he ordered this ultra deluxe, 4 player arcade machine wrapped in Star wars graphics, I don't have the original pic so here's a sample render he spared no expense, spending $3000 plus $220 shipping.

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Text - The machine arrives in Melbourne 5 days later and he calls me up losing his shit. It's been damaged by the freight company. I send everything fully insured so l assured him it was ok, he's covered. Please send me the pics of the damage. It was only very slight, nothing cosmetic, but the console was a little dislodged as they must have stacked something heavy on it.

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Text - I assured the customer it could be fixed, I'l contract a cabinet maker to come out to him and repair it at my expense, then l'll go through insurance later. Nope. he didn't want that. So i said ok, l'Il arrange for collection and have it brought back to me, and l'll issue him a full refund including freight.

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Text - Nope. He didn't want that either. Ok I said, what would make you happy then? It's something easy to fix, perhaps i can pay you what I'd pay the contractor (about $250) and you can fix it? Nope. He wanted a full refund AND he wanted to keep the machine too. I said that won't happen. Insurance won't allow it as the damage is tiny. It's like car insurance, they won't write off a whole car for minor damage that can be fixed. He didn't care, he wanted a refund.

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Text - I said they won't do it, andI certainly wont pay out of pocket. Either l'll arrange collection of the unit at my expense and issue a refund to him or we have it repaired. Nope. He paid via Paypal and he's putting through a dispute because the item "didn't arrive as described". I advised him that Paypal's rules also state that in order to get a refund, He'll need to show proof that he'd sent the item back or arranged with the sender to have it collected.

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Text - Nope. He's keeping it and getting a refund. So l advised him that what he was committing was fraud and theft, Also Paypal will freeze the $3220 in my account and l'm not at fault here. That's what Paypal does you see. If anyone lodges a dispute, they automatically freeze the funds in the sellers account. it's guilty until proven innocent with them. It can also take up to 90 days to resolve, sometimes 6 months. I know, it's happened before. He didn't care. The next thing i knew, I had a no

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Text - The next step is stating your case to them. Providing evidence etc where they relay the info back and forth between the buyer and seller. Paypal ALWAYS sides with the buyer, sellers are a piece of shit as far as they're concerned. If it cant be resolved between buyer and seller, then you can opt to have Paypal decide. but their decision is absolute. I provided my transcripts advising the customer that l'd collect the item and refund him, and he provided them with a fake pick up receipt. A

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Text - So this fucker now has his money back and my $3000 machine. I was fuming, and he wouldn't answer my calls or emails. Il'm a big guy and i had a rough upbringing in a tough neighbourhood, so i was about to jump into my truck, drive the 900km south, knock on his door and watch him shit himself as i repossess my machine. But my wife being the voice of reason calmed me down and said to try legal avenues first.

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Text - coincidentally he emails me 3 days later and says the computer in the machine stopped working. I replied "which fucking planet do you live on where you steal an item then complain it doesn't work?" he lol'ed me and said he had an IT guy. A few days after that i get a call from a guy saying that his friend bought an item and the Hard drive is dead. It was his IT guy, and i don't think he knew the whole story. I asked him to find the serial number, it's just the date it was built and the it

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Text - Now note that he said the HDD was dead, that's a good thing. If it had been the computer, he could just use anything else and use the HDD as a back up. But since it was dead, and now i had his computer too, he has to buy a new system which would set him back at least $450 but he still couldn't play games in it. You can download the apps but there's a tonne of config work and button mapping etc.

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Text - IT guy calls me a few days later asking for the computer, and I told him the story and that nope, he can go fuck himself. He also lol'ed and asked how hard it could possibly be to just download shit. See, what he didn't know is that i have a little fail safe built in. The encoder I use isnt mapped to the default keys on the apps. I changed everything around on the hardware to stop people trying to just clone it. It's not hard to get around, but most people aren't familiar with the nuances

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Text - inevitably, i get another call a few days later from a different guy saying that he'd built his own machine but couldn't get it working. the symptoms were exactly that of trying to get my controls working on a different system. It was definitely the IT guy fishing. I played dumb and said i didn't know, sorry. Now this guy had an empty useless cabinet, so he left me a one star review on Google. It's since been removed but it read something like "poor quality build, flimsy, system doesn't w

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Text - I was about to jump into my truck again and drive down to that fuckface. But again, my wife is like a bucket of ice water to my fire. So i wrote a long letter to Paypal attaching all of my evidence of his fraud. Then i responded to the 1 star review with attachments to the emails and his admission to committing the fraud. Also i displayed his name and email address to smoke him out. He immediately called and said, "look, no hard feelings ok, but i received a damaged item and i'm entitled

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Text - I forgot about it after a few weeks, Paypal didn't respond so i cut my losses and moved on. But then something beautiful happened. It's as though the universe aligned and said "Hey Abs, we're not going to shit on you today, here, take this gift on a silver platter"

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Text - I was on ebay looking for old non working machines i can buy and refurb, there's good money to be made doing that. A one day refurb could pull in over $1000 profit. He's listed my machine! but contrary to his google review, the description was "marvelous hand built arcade cabinet, built by a master carpenter, flawless finish and quality, missing computer. Good for a DIY project" (I'm not a carpenter by the way) he had it listed for $1100. That was still $1100 pure profit to him since he g

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Text - I bought it under my wife's account and had it delivered to my home address. When i sent it, it was wrapped in about a 4 inch thick layer of bubble wrap. When it arrived it had a flimsy single layer less than 5mm thick. The courier who dropped it off was the same guy who picked up from me, we were good friends and he knew the story. So i said i was going to damage it, make it look serious, but nothing i cant fix in a few minutes. He agreed and said that he'd log the damage as due to insuf

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Text - I knocked the panels out from inside so it looked like the machine had been crushed, realistically i only had to reset the screws and it was good as new, But it looked mangled. Then i sent Melbourne dickhead the pics and complained about the damage. He said it was insured. I advised him the courier said it was insufficiently packaged and that it's not covered, i want a refund, take this back. I knew he wouldn't take it back, it was totally useless to him.

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Text - He said he didn't want it and he'll refund the freight. I said nope. I can't do anything with a damaged machine, if he doesn't do anything, l'm filing a Paypal dispute under "item not as described" he wasn't happy, played the victim, played on my sympathy still not realizing who i was. Eventually after offering me partial refunds and getting rejected, he relented and told me to keep it and he'd refund me in full. He must've realized that his greed wasn't worth it and it cost him nothing.

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Text - So now i had my machine back and I was happy this was over with, still pissed at this guys audacity, but meh. That's not the end though....it gets better, oh does it get deliciously better. Someone at Paypal business had finally read my complaint. Since I do a lot of work through Paypal under a business account, there's kind of a concierge service although not really, kind of like a priority service. They actually went through my complaint, verified that his pick up docket was actually a

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Text - They refunded my money in full. Now i had my machine back and $3k of his money and he couldn't do shit because he got caught for fraud. Can't dispute shit if you got caught being dishonest He called me up losing his shit. I laughed and said sorry mate, it's karma, It's purely up to my good will to refund you, go suck a doorknob.

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Tagged: customer service , pro revenge , satisfying , revenge , awesome , Reddit , win

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New Manager Gives Resident Homeless Guy A Shot

This new manager did their part to break the cycle of homelessness and help out the guy camped out behind their restaurant by giving him a job. Reminds us of this donut shop manager who handled a customer's angry review. Here are some wholesome memes to go with the theme of people helping each other out.

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Text - r/TalesFromYourServer Posted by 4 3 6 Awards f... u/tamiraisredditing 13 days ago Awesome new manager breaks cycle with homeless guy outside Short My old manager was a real “working for the weekend" type and never went out of their way for us or the customers, no matter what.

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Text - One of the most difficult things about her was we had a homeless guy who'd camp out in our back alley because a lot of heat comes off a vent back there and she'd always make us toss him out because he was visible to customers from the main entrance. She's gone and we have a new manager now. Her first week, one of the employees said "hey that guy's back" and the new manager said "this guy here often?" and we told her the whole story. She asked what our interactions with him had been like a

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Text - She walks out, shakes the guy's hand, and offers him a dishwashing job on a trial basis. She had one of the busboys help him get cleaned up and put him right to work. He knocked it out of the park, made good honest money, and got staff dinner. She told him he was welcome to come back to work any night of the week and if he was consistent she'd see about getting him hired. That was two weeks ago, and he started on a permanent basis today!

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Text - Edit: Thanks for the medals :) Edit to add: I can't believe how this post has blown up! I just showed it to him and he was honestly a bit freaked out by the whole thing, but touched by the incredible support and personal stories people shared. He's been able to move back in with his brother now that he has a job and is saving up all the money he makes here. He's a month clean and says things are going better now than they have in a long time! He says thanks again.

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Text - motown_missile 2.4k points · 13 days ago It will be interesting to see if he becomes an employee, and gets himself back into housing. Your new manager sounds like a terrific person to even have thought to offer him work. tamiraisredditing 2 2.2k points · 13 days ago She's a real class act, perfect balance of optimist and hard ass. She believes anyone is capable of excellence regardless of who they are, so she gives everyone equal opportunities to advance, but holds everyone to the same hi

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Text - motown_missile 1.2k points · 13 days ago Savor the shit out of her. She's literally one in a million as a person. As a manager probably closer to one in a billion. 980 points · 13 days ago I'm pretty sure this is her first civilian job out of the Navy, so I'm not too surprised nothing's tamiraisredditing managed to throw her yet. I'll probably leave this place when she does.

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Tagged: chance , wholesome , manager , job , work , awesome , homeless , restaurant , nice

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Strange Illusions Caused By Weird Perspective

In an effort to try to recognize everything at a glance, eyes sometimes throw information at us that doesn't exactly make sense. Strange perspective can give us things that shouldn't exist, for instance, a valley inside of a fence post, or a cat with a human butt.

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Muscle - Posted in r/bodybuilding O reddit

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Selling - IX HayM BОТЙ Apty ae tiouxonot CAcoRciaodien оп ВИЛАЙ

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Clothes iron - Glovex ultra ter /Medium (7-8l Talsta

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Nature - Amazing jungle valley or weathered fence post top?

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Washing machine - Please, if you are ever washing your favorite shirt with a picture of your child on it, just put a warning note on the washer or something.. ARussianAndHisBike reuse Cancel Press&Hold 3 sec Rin Anti- Crease Prewash Quick Wash Extra Rinse

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Tagged: cool , wtf , doubletake , strange , interesting , perspective , optical illusion , funny , illusion , weird

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Guy Tries To Pretend He Doesn't Know English, Fails Hard

This guy made a grave mistake. And that mistake was one of him trying to tell a lady asking for money that he didn't speak English, while he very well did the whole time. It's tough to pull off the whole "I don't speak your language" thing when you're literally speaking their language right back to them.

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Text - r/tifu Posted by u/MrWittyResponse 1 day ago TIFU by telling a lady asking me for money that I didn't speak English... in perfect English So it was late at night and I had to make a stop at the gas station to fill up my car. This lady comes up to me wearing this really baggy hoodie. Judging by appearances she seemed to be a substance abuser. She says she's pregnant and needs some cash to pay for her motel room. I really wasn't buying it: she

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Text - didn't look pregnant at all and looked like she had a pillow or something under her sweater. I was really tired and didn't want to deal with her so my tired brain decided that rather than just saying no the best thing to do would be to pretend that I was a foreigner and couldn't speak English. So I replied to her saying "Sorry, I don't speak English". She gave me a bewildered look and said "Oh ok". But then she realized... "hey but you just said that in perfect English." Realizing I had m

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Text - started to panic and said "Yeah but that's all the English I know". She lost her shit at this point and started yelling at me for lying and making fun of her. I ended up quickly paying and the pump and quickly drove off with my head down. TLDR: tried to pretend I didn't know English to get out of an awkward situation

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Tagged: english , language , ridiculous , tifu , Reddit , stupid

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Overworked Employee Revolts By Doing His Exact Job Description

People often find after they're hired that their job description doesn't cover nearly as much as what they're actually expected to do. Already stretched to the limit with a dwindling and under-qualified staff, this guy was asked to "do his job" so that's exactly what he did. People have different responses to being bullied at work, like this employee who prank fires themselves or this guy who stood up to his boss who didn't allow sick days.

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Text - r/MaliciousCompliance - Posted by S 2 A... u/EricCartmenez 13 hours ago "Would you just do your fucking job?" oc XL When I was 19 years old and a fresh high school (or my country's equivalent) graduate, I had no idea what I wanted to do with my life. The one thing I did know is that I needed money, so I started applying for all kinds of jobs. After a few weeks of writing applications, going to interviews and waiting nervously for replies, I was hired as a full-time sales assistant an inte

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Text - Said company was in the process of opening their first official store in my country and I, as I was hired about 3 months before they were due to open, helped them however I could. I created one-pagers (basically posters that show all the hardware inside a device plus a picture), translated manuals, put security tags on products etc. Whatever they wanted me to do I did, sometimes until late at night, still foolishly thinking that this initiative would maybe be recognized in one shape or an

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Text - The first thing we realized we didn't have were guidelines on how to handle returns and warranty cases. As the company's electronics had been available online long before the store opened, some people now started bringing in their devices to get them fixed or swapped out, none of which we knew how to handle. This annoyed a lot of customers, being given the information that only devices bought at our specific store would be handled under warranty only made things worse for us. We were gett

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Text - This, as it turned out was only the tip of the iceberg. Some of the other problems we had included: -Having a break room with no access to fresh water, no fridge, no microwave and of course no bathroom (all big no-nos where I live) -Resupply came in sporadically at best, sometimes we were resupplied twice a week, sometimes there were no deliveries for three weeks, making it very hard for us to tell our customers when their devices will be arriving. -The store manager was so incompetent, h

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Text - -The bosses upstairs apparantly wanted us to provide tech support over the phone, which again none of us where trained to do. We did our best, but only really ended up with more threats in addition to having our official store phone number constantly blocked by these calls. Also, we were expected to take over social media communications as well, meaning we now had to answer questions on Facebook, Twitter, Instagram etc., putting even more strain on our small team. In the end, the manager

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Text - I took over most of his duties, still only earning about half of what the manager made. Naively I worked 60 to 70 hour weeks for almost 3 months straight, still thinking that this would somehow pay off. I made sure to tell my bosses how much more I did than we agreed upon in my contract, but they didn't seem to care. That is, until our sales figures dropped. All of a sudden I had two of them come into the store unannounced, basically drag me into a back room and start lecturing me on how

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Text - Me: "Well, a lot of customers are unhappy with the way we h-" Boss 2: "Our products are very competitive, why are you still struggling to sell them?" Me (slightly disgruntled): "Well SIR, as I was trying to say, the customers are not happy with our service and running a store with just two employees is almost impossible. If we could hire two more assistants, maybe we could focus better on our numbers." Boss 1: "The interviews for those positions are ongoing, you will have new employees so

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Text - After that meeting I felt defeated. Doing all this extra work, staying late, taking responsibility for things I had no business taking responsibility for, the threats, the uncertainty, the stress, the sleep deprivation, all for nothing. And that's when it clicked in my head: Fuck those guys. The wanted me to do my job? Fine. From now on, I would do exactly what my job description says, nothing more, nothing less. The next day, I came in early, opened the store, everything normal. Until th

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Text - Later that day, after my collegue had arrived, we got delivery of new product for the store. The delivery guy handed me the manifest, asking for a signature. Again declined, stating that I was just "doing my job" and the manager would have to sign that. After making it clear to him there wasn't a manager on site, he left, taking all of the new product with him, product which we desperately needed. But I was beyong caring at this point. About fifteen minutes later, I got a call from Boss 1

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Text - Half an hour later, Boss 1 and 2 descended onto me. They rushed into the store demanding an explanation for my behaviour. I simply replied: "I'm just doing my job sir, just like you asked me to do." Boss 1: "What the fuck do you mean? Then why has nobody accepted today's delivery or the documents we've sent you?!" Me: "Well, that's the managers job. I am not a manager." Boss 2: "Yes you fucking are, what the hell are you talking about?" Me: "Uh, no, not only would my pay be pretty poor fo

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Text - Boss 2: "And who the hell is supposed to the managers job if not for you?" Me: "I don't know, but I would gladly do it, if you doubled my salary of course." Boss 1: "Hahaha! (actually laughing in my face) Who the hell do you think you are? We can have you replaced with someone cheaper in a heartbeat!" Me: "Okay then, go ahead, I quit, effective immidiately. Bye." And then I just left. My remaining collegue, upon hearing me quit, also quit immidiately, leaving our former bosses wide-eyed w

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Text - The kicker? About a month after I quit and with my lawsuit for unpaid wages now pending, I got a call from Boss 1, telling me he wanted to accept my offer of doubling my salary to become the store manager. He said noone was willing to take the job now that word got around how awful things are in the store. The following conversation ensued: Me: "Frankly Boss 1(I used his first name here, just to piss him off), I don't much like getting laughed at, so I'm afraid if you want me to come back

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Tagged: horrible , manager , job , work , stressful , stress , story , win

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Brainiac Answers Ridiculous Question About Bacteria

This must be the smartest answer to one of the dumbest questions we've seen in a long time.

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Text - When you spit in the urinal and there's a string of saliva, do the bacteria have time to go inside your mouth? Anoop Sinha, Taught microbiology to medical undergrads for >10 years Updated Sep 29 - Upvoted by Prafful Sharma, M.Sc Microbiology, Savitribai Phule Pune University (2019) Vibrio is one of the fastest bacteria around, if not the fastest. If you see live Vibrio under the microscope, they seem to zip around like Barry Allen navigating through Central city. Image from https://www.an

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Text - micrometers per second. Another website gives a figure of 200 micrometers per second, and cites the McGraw-Hill Encyclopedia of Science and Technology as its reference (I could not verify this). I'm inclined to accept the lower estimate, as it is from a scientific, peer-reviewed journal. For an organism that's barely 2 micrometers in length, these are incredible speeds. It's like an average adult human running at 75 to 200 meters per second (270 - 720 km per hr or 168 - 447 miles per hr).

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Text - Image from https://www.todayonline.com/sing... Z 50 cm = 500000 micrometers. That's a loooong bridge! (Public domain image from pxhere.com 2) Time taken for traversing 500000 micrometres when moving at 200 micrometers per second = 500000/200 %3D = 2500 seconds. That's close to 42 minutes. Hah! I knew Douglas Adams was onto something! 42 is the answer to life, the universe and everything! If we go by the more realistic estimate of bacterial speed (75 microns per second), this increases to

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Text - minutes. So, if a bacterium is to travel from a urinal to your mouth on a bridge of salivary mucus, then all of the following criteria have to be satisfied: 1. The urinal should be harbouring Vibrio. 2. The top speed of this bacterium is assumed to be 200 micrometers per second. 3. This bacterium must be moving upwards continuously at top speed. 4. You should stand still for about 42 minutes. 5. The salivary bridge should remain stable for this time period. So, to answer your question...

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Tagged: wtf , bacteria , quora , smart , ridiculous , funny , stupid , intelligent

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Engaged Couple Wants To Serve Chipotle At The Wedding

This couple asked the people of Reddit whether or not they were jerks for wanting to serve Chipotle at their wedding. It sounds like the idea is motivated by sentimentality and the desire to save some money in the process. Most people are of the opinion that it's their wedding, and thus up to them!

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Text - WIBTA for serving Chipotle at my wedding? No A-holes here I'm getting maried in April, and when my fiance and I started planning our wedding, we were shocked by how expensive all of the different components were, especially catering. We live in a high cost of living area, and the cheapest catering quotes we were able to get were still well over $100 per person. We're inviting 75 people and the thought of spending $8,000 or more on food is pretty horrifying.

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Text - And then we started thinking – our first date was at a Chipotle, and it's been our go-to spot whenever we're in the mood to go out for lunch. We thought it would be a really fun idea to have them cater our wedding, and we could tie it all together with cute little signs with sayings like "life is burrito-ful with you" (maybe not quite that corny, but you get the idea). Even though we'd have to rent tableware/glassware and hire some people to bus the tables, it would still be thousands of

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Text - My parents have been pretty laid back about our decisions, but they are adamant that we cannot serve Chipotle and that it would be cheap and tacky and reflect badly on them/us. My mom in particular is worried that family traveling from out of state will find it insulting. My fiance's parents think it's a little strange but they're not nearly as opinionated and are basically just like "do whatever you guys want."

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Text - If it matters, my fiance and I are financing the majority of the wedding, but our parents have made some contributions as well. My parents have a family friend who runs a gorgeous event venue in our area and were able to negotiate a great deal for us, and they also offered to pay for the flowers and the cake, which we very much appreciate. My fiance's parents are paying for the rehearsal dinner. Would people really be that insulted by Chipotle at a wedding? WIBTA?

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Text - ThaneOfCawdorrr • 10h Why don't you go to a smaller, perhaps nicer Mexican restaurant, and ask them to cater. You could then get tamales, taquitos, small appetizer type things, home made guacamole and chips, they could set out a giant chafing dish of carne asada, or carnitas, homemade tortillas, etc? You could also hire a bartender to make margaritas. It would taste a whole lot better, be more elegant, seem a lot more generous, and very likely would not cost that much more Plus you'd be g

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Text - lisasimpsonfan • 18h • Colo-rectal Surgeon [49] NAH Is it tacky? Maybe depending on the venue. If you are having this formal wedding with an expensive high end venue it's going to look cheap AF to everyone if all you serve is Chipotle. They might call it "fast casual" but really it's still fast food. You might as well buy a couple 6' subs. Especially if you have family flying in and you serve fast food. OUCH. Now if you are doing more of a casual outdoor-isy type wedding then it's not so

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Text - rcmjnbnoe • 18h NAH. Is this venue super formal?- if that's the case, I could see it raising some eyebrows, especially if you have people coming in from out of town. But then, I feel like there's a lot of people who would rather have tacos, BBQ, pizza, etc. than traditional wedding food (you always hear about bland wedding chicken). Weddings are expensive. If your guest list is in the 70s, depending on the size of your families, odds are good that you guys have pared down your guest list

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Text - ggfangirl85 • 17h If you're having a big formal wedding, then it's a bit tacky to serve that kind of food. So messy with everyone in their finery. However if it's a casual wedding, that honestly sounds like a delicious menu. Ultimately it's your wedding and your money so you get to do what you want. NTA

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Text - Golddustgirlboss • 7h I don't know. I think this will be a disaster. Like how are you going to expect them to get the 75 it's right and to you at the exact time you want with all the food still being hot? Sure it may be great for an office to order in lunch but there is a reason it's taboo for catering weddings. I understand your pain with costs but you need to consider too that people are going to give you a gift trying to cover the cost of the plate. So even if it costs $8000 think abou

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Text - yikes-say-less • 15h Have you tried local businesses that do catering instead of catering companies? Because those have their own unique flavors and menus and are usually a lot less pricey. But if you want to do chipotle, do chipotle. Make it about your first date, make the presentation cute, and anybody who judges doesn't have a very great sense of humor and is kinda worried about the wrong thing. Celebrate your love how you want to celebrate, it's your wedding so no one else's opinions

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Text - Oliver_Green • 18h • Asshole Aficionado [15] NTA. It's your wedding. If you want to married in an all nude ceremony under the full moon with a choir of barn cats in heat, you do you. I served appetizers at my wedding, I promise you that decision has no bearing on the rest of my life. If your family cares more about the food you serve than about being present and happy for you, they can leave. Those types will find something to gossip about anyway, don't plan your wedding around the Jones'

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Text - Nixie_D • 18h • Asshole Enthusiast [5] NAH Chipotle isn't really a thing in my country. But running off of google, yeah, l'd consider it a bit tacky. But l'm not paying, so it really doesn't matter what I think. And at the same time could be awesome. All depends on how you do it. Maybe see if they can do something special for you? What I do know, food is generally rhe biggest expense at a wedding. And remembered best. Also check with the venue on if you can bring in food. I don't know if

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Text - heyitssani • 12h YTA–if it's a formal wedding. I don't understand why people are saying it's fine because it's “free food" when you have to give gifts/money at a wedding. I think you should mention the menu with your guests beforehand so they can adjust their gift value.

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Text - Bairbearbarebear • 14h NAH but sounds tacky as hell and I get where your parents are coming from. Food is kind of the one big thing that guests get, and if the venue, cake, flowers etc. are fancy but you serve the guests CHIPOTLE, then it's kind of a slap in the face. I get that you got all the fancy stuff on the cheap, which is fab, but no one will know that. I totally get you in principle though, which is why I say NAH...but I don't think it's a good idea. No one really remembers detail

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Text - justhewayouare • 15h NTA- your wedding your decision. The industry is ridiculous as it is and they basically rob people so screw them. Do your food your way and have a blast! l'd LOVE a wedding with Chipotle! l'd think you guys were the bomb hahaha. Food trucks and such at weddings isn't at all uncommon.

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Text - CyborgsRHere •16h YTA You want the fancy venue, flowers and cake but not the food? Hold a brunch wedding but don't skimp out on the food. *do heavy apps instead of a full meal *a buffet, Which is a more variety of food (more economical options). *Potluck with catered options. People will remember the lack of food and possible beverages. When planning my own wedding I heard soo many stories of these types. People forget the venue. They remember the eats and drinks. There are economical opt

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Text - TheGoblina • 7h This is a bad idea and you should not do it. I'm not calling it an asshole move, but it is definitely a bad move and inconsiderate of your guests. I don't accept the premise that your only options are $100/plate caterers or chipotle. There are other options you haven't explored yet. Playing it off as a sentimental nod to your first date is insufficient justification. I love chipotle but many people's bodies have strong digestive objections and I wouldn't want half my older

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Text - PiccChicc • 17h NTA and a great idea. It's special to you and your future wife. You didn't even need to bring up the dietary needs, it being perfect for the two of you is it.

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Text - Llamagr4m • 6h NAH but in a formal setting it will be extremely tacky. You need to decide what kind of a wedding YOU want and stick with that. If you're getting married at some manor with a live orchestra then yeah it will be tacky af and your guests will hate it.

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Text - Bobbob34 • 17h • Colo-rectal Surgeon [41] You do you but.... at a nice venue, I would find that decidedly odd. If it were a backyard thing, or at an Elk's Lodge or whatever, church basement reception I wouldn't be eating it, but I wouldn't think it was weird. Personally, I think it's gross, and btw, I hear everything has cilantro, so you probably want to order some stuff without, but it's your wedding. NAH but l'd reconsider the venue if that's what you want to do.

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Text - late2reddit19 • 17h NTA. This is a matter of personal opinion. Would I personally serve Chipotle at my wedding? Never. But Chipotle seems to have a special significance since it was where you guys had your first date. That being said, I understand your parents thinking that it's tacky to serve only Chipotle at what seems to be a fancy wedding with out of town guests. For a lot of people, one of the main reason to go to a wedding is to eat the awesome food after the ceremony. If people are

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Text - CharacterRoyal • 9h • Asshole Enthusiast [6] NAH, It's your wedding, but id be pretty disappointed if I went to a wedding that was catered with fast food, remember that its not just people your age coming to the wedding, there will be grandparents, aunts, uncles, older family friends etc. It's a wedding, it would be pretty tacky to have such a nice venue and ceremony and then serve chipotle. Like you might as well do a brunch for cheaper, weddings are one of the only times in normal peopl

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Text - AMerrickanGirl • 18h • Partassipant [1] NTA. But there's a cheaper alternative that isn't Chipotle. As soon as you tell a caterer it's a wedding, the price triples, so call a caterer and say it's a regular party.

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White - Ovenproofcorgi • 14h NTA Chipotle is delicious.

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Tagged: marriage , controversial , chipotle , ridiculous , food , engagement , reaction , Reddit

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Breakup Texts That Ended Things In A Blaze Of Glory

Some people are more graceful with the breakup process than others. These relationships just didn't work out. And the texts are filled to the brim with pain and heartbreak.