People Who Aggressively Didn't Get The Joke and more...

Most of us have a decent idea of how jokes work, or we are at least somewhat adept of seeing the signs of when something is a joke. It would be rough walking around this world just thinking everyone is stupid and wrong all the time. To further confuse the literal minded, here are some technically accurate moments that aren't wrong. And for some straight up dumbness, here are some facepalm moments from humanity's beacons of stupid.

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Yellow - WHAT HAPPENS WHEN I TELL PEOPLE I'M COLORBLIND. That's cool "points at the object WHAT COLOR IS THIS?! 1h You forgot to put yellow into the list Reply 1 -14 +

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Human body - How to slow down time Step 1: 1 Share 36.3k 289 Award SINGLE COMMENT THREAD VIEW ALL 7h This doesn't actually slow down time, it just seems slower because you doing something difficult so you're more aware of it Reply -26

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Text - Conan O'Brien O @ConanOBrien · 3h I can only imagine how slow Netflix streaming must have been while quarantining for the 1918 pandemic. O 237 27 922 12.8K Replying to @ConanOBrien There was no Netflix back then genius. 19:42 02 Aug 20 · Twitter for iPhone 6 Likes TERRY @ConanOBrien Actually there was. But you had to order it by telegram. Roughly two weeks after your request, a team of actors would arrive and play out your choice.

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Chin - If you ever ask to speak to the manager and this guy walks out, just say thank you and leave TRY OUR DELICIOUS SPECIAL LOS PULLOS 2Pe f Chcke Swpe HERTHNOS A Cy 56 8 Comments 21 Shares O Like Comment Share No, he is there to do his job And that is to hear what I have to say.He may not like it but it is his job

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Brown - NTSTONES Goodbye world Today at 10:3O PM that won't kill you

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Text - Tweet Got sad news today. After 7 years of medical training, my good friend has been struck off after 1 minor indiscretion. He slept with 1 of his patients & now can no longer work in the job he loves. What a waste of time, training & money. A genuinely nice guy, and a brilliant vet.. 6:41 AM · 12/26/20 · Twitter for iPhone 446 Retweets 49 Quote Tweets 5,700 Likes Replying to Sleeping with a patient is NOT a minor indiscretion. Glad he's gone after taking advantage of a vulnerable person.

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Product - picture taken of a black hole in a visible light spectrum. First ever No this is a cat

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Technology - NORWE Fucking racist with his confedarate flag - 4h Replying to It literally says Norway on top, holy fuck 7

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Screenshot - Michael Caine @themichaelcaine Chris Nolan has done it again. Tenet is the best action film ever. 20:48 · 27 Aug 20 · Twitter for iPhone 6.261 Retweets and comments 35,5K Likes Lo · 14h v Replying to @themichaelcaine Micheal how do you get to see the wonderful film before us the general public lol 37 8 13h He's in it 5 LC

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Colorfulness - Am I the first human to be color blind and solve a 4x4 rubik's cube? 10h But you didn't solve it Reply 4 -47

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Space - Can't believe some people stil think that moon landing was faked They don't have the helmets on

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Human - Just 3 lesbians looking at each other.. Wheres the 3rd one 3 1d Like Reply View 4 more replies

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Electronic device - AR If you ever crash your car just press this button and it'll undo the accident r This is lie. That button makes air cırcle car. Idiot liar.

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Text - Green - Science Memes 1 hr •O The four horsemen of invisibility: why is the screen all white ? if you call posting a white picture a meme then iam disapointed 42m Like Reply this is the pic 26 PM Agmal's Post Aqmal Zakaria Science Memes 2m ge The four horsemen of invisibility: O817 O817 O55 A 123 40m Like Reply stop trolling dude i see nothing only a blank pic 37m Like Reply What 37m Like Reply You serious abt that? 35m Like Reply

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Ingredient - The manager at our local IKEA is retiring, so I sent him this cake... wheres the cake

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Green - My Girlfriend sent me a birthday gift & asked not to open untill the midnight I am so much curious I hope it's a Dog Bro it is a drum set 2 d 25 likes Reply View 1 reply

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Horse - May 25 Replying to Is your milkshake really worth it? 14 27 103 1.6K May 25 The second photo is a woodturning lathe wtf 3 27 34

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Human - Everyone Why is it when something happens it is always you three? USA America -United States 3.9k 25 Share CONTROVERSIAL COMMENTS 3h Why are you so bad at geography that you used United States, America, and USA? USA means United States of America and America is more then just the US.

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Cheek - Me coming to work at 6 am after going to bed at 2 am samon. without he.L 349 487 Comments · 78 Shares 7 Like Comment Share That is Prince Phillip.

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Tire - Electricity was invented in 1752 People before 1752; Actually cars weren't invented yet in 1752 so you're WRONG haha 45 εβδ. Απάντηση Δείτε 2 απαντήσεις

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Text - JOIN THE 2 DAY CHALLENGE! NO ALCOHOL ON FEBRUARY 30 AND 31! CAN YOU DO IT? 60 20 Comments · 22 Shares Litke לן Comment Share There is no 30 or 31 this February! Hello knock knock

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Brown - Cowboy Cow 475 41 Comments · 173 Shares O Like Comment Share Thats a f king horse

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Nose - Played four roles in one movie Played 200,000 roles in one movie with a million more well on the way * 845 57 comments • 126 shares O Like Comment Share ® Top fan Not really. Every armored clone trooper in the prequel trilogy is CGI. So he didn't actually play any of those.

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Text - Tom D'Angora O @TomDangora - 13h North Korea is going to have a Woman leader before the United States of PRO America! Let that sink in! 3.2K 27 305 1.3K Christina Sommers Following @CHSommers Replying to @TomDangora What is your point? No one votes in North Korea. 7:38 PM - 25 Apr 2020 101 Retweets 1,731 Likes 39 t7 101 1.7K REASONA Replying to @CHSommers @TomDangora Well, one person does. No. Stays in the fam and younger Sis will take over. Kim will probably show up laughing at us tomorr

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Text - + Follow 489 followers 1w. O : - 5 nov. this is how developers solve problems Cutting tennis balls in half lets you store 2 more balls, saving space 41 ti 304 2k 40 - 1 Comment Like Comment Share Send Add a comment.. Most Relevant 1w .. Junior System Engineer chez NEC Corporation Saving useless balls is no benefit man. I would rather let three working balls than break everything loool

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Tagged: wtf , jokes , facepalm , satire , Memes , misunderstanding , lol , stupid , internet memes , funny comments , funny memes

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Nostalgic Memes From The Olden Golden Days

We're all prone to spontaneous fits of nostalgia where we find ourselves mentally entrenched in reliving the days of our youth. You know, the days when you could fearlessly stomp around your home, and then be humbled by the profound pain of a LEGO block that decided to implant itself in your foot? These nostalgic memes are sure to strike some chords. Check out some more nostalgic memes for the 80s and 90s kids over here.

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Green - Kids these days will never know what the ultimate thumb destroyer was GameofLoans DURACELL 100% DURACELL POWERCHECKTM

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Font - CHILDHOOD MEMORY #261 BEING HIT IN THE SHINS BY THESE BASTARDS FROM HELL

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Ball - YOU CAN STILL HEAR THE SOUND THIS BALL MADE WHEN IT HIT YOU

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Knee - The most painful thing was getting whipped on the ankles by a razor Scooter RazOr

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Nature - HOT DAY+METAL SLIDE = TEMPORARY BLINDNESS AND BURNS.

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Blue - WHEN YOU FIND THE MISSING LEGO IN THE WORST WAY POSSIBLE 000 @ayerageparemtproblems

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Wood - snowyenjolras: *rides into battle on a gym class butt scooter* *runs over fingers* ffu fuKFUCK ABORT MISSION A BOR T FUCLKGJIN MISSION GODDAMMIT

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Finger - TodaysKidsWillNeverKnow You could end a MFs life with one of these.

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Text - You didn't have a childhood if you didn't put one of these bad boys under your legs in the pool and pretended you were surfing speeda mada with maado 1 Share 159 10.1k BEST COMMENTS - IttyBittyBigBoy 3h And then it shoots out of the water like a torpedo and gives you a Mike Tyson uppercut from hell.

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Display device - *Puts down gently in fear of breaking the TV* *Puts down gently in fear of breaking the table and your fingers*

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Green - Rhyaan @Rhyaan_ Some of y'all never got tricked into pulling one of these by your siblings PULL HERE SHOCK and it really shows SHOCK PULL HERE CHEWING GUM SHOCK PULL HERE CH ING OUM SHOCK PULL HERE @memezar C/ @babynanss why were these legal Imao

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Tagged: humor , throwback , relatable , nostalgia , Memes , funny , internet memes , relatable memes , random memes

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Ancestry DNA Tests That Unearthed Family Secrets

Someone on AskReddit got a thread going about the wildest revelations that came to light after various families tried out those Ancestry DNA tests. This certainly isn't the first time that we've encountered some crazy Ancestry DNA drama. We had the one dude who ended up creating chaos in his family after purchasing one of the $99 kits. We also had that other story about a family getting completely blindsided by an emotionally shocking secret from another one of the kits.

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Text - CatMakes3 • 5h 8 1 Award My real father and 3 half siblings-it ended up being a really good discovery. Reply 2.2k 3 ...

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Text - Freeagnt · 3h 2 e S E 11 Awards A full 100% older brother. My mother got pregnant by my father before the were married. Scandalous in 1960. So, with my father's knowledge of the situation, mom left town, and lived with my aunt until the birth. Mom gave the baby up for adoption, and then returned home. A couple years later, she married my dad and had three more children together, including me. Fifty five years later, after both my parents had died, my aunt let it slip that me and my siblin

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Text - OrangeTree81 • 4h 1 Award My male cousin did one and found a female cousin we did not know about. He reached out to her and apparently our deceased uncle was good friends with her mother. Mom wanted a baby so uncle got her pregnant simply as a sperm donor. Female cousin lived a few blocks away from my grandmother. She had met her a few times going around selling Girl Scout cookies or something. My grandmother had no idea that she was buying cookies from her granddaughter. Reply 4 1.5k ...

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Text - AgentElman • 4h 1 Award A friend discovered that her father was not really her father. Her mom had an affair and she was the result. It tore her family apart. Her "father" did not know he was not really her father. Reply 1 1.8k 3 ...

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Text - faye_okay_ • 4h My ex-husband's family were proud of their Dutch heritage and claimed to be one of the founding families of the historically Dutch Holland, MI. His ancestry results didn't show any Dutch ancestry. Instead, he had primarily English/Irish ancestry. Q Reply 2.0k 3 ...

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Text - last_to_know42· 3h Not me, My wife A few years ago my wife and I both took the 23 and me test. One of her matches came back with 23% which is high for someone non-family. She messaged him and they started talking. He was about 10 years older, said he was adopted and the only thing he knew was some basic biological info. From his age that would have put her mom at 14 but her mom never said anything about it. So the two options were her mom got knocked up young or Grandma had a secret love

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Text - sunshineykris • 3h 1 Award So, I did the health DNA one 18 months ago because I wanted to see if I had the breast cancer gene, as there is several incidences on both sides of my family. Got my results and became very confused, it claimed I had no Italian despite my father's grandma literally coming over from Sicily in 1920. It took me a few minutes to realize what that actually meant. My parents have been together since my mother was 14, I was born when she was 17, and my father joined th

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Text - pinkiea · 5h Not me, but a family friend. He did the test and found out he had a half-brother. Turns out his dad had an affair a while back, and that kid was a product of that affair. Reply 625 ...

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Text - AztecWheels • 4h 3 2 Awards I found a half sister that none of my siblings or mother knew about. My dad had an affair 50 years ago (he's dead now). For us it wasn't really a surprise, we already have a half-sister from another affair but for the newly discovered one it answered a lot of questions and gave her some needed closure. We all met a few times, it was pleasant. Reply 1 573 ...

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Text - Grave_Girl · 4h S 1 Award Found out that my brother is only my half-brother. Our parents (well, who we thought were both our parents) were never married. But my mom has insisted my whole life that my dad is my brother's dad. He never acknowledged my brother (he did me), claiming that the man my mom was living with at the time was probably his father. My mom has always said the other fellow was simply her roommate. Given that my dad was an alcoholic and chronic liar and our mom has never b

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Text - So we're left with the certainty that our mom has been wrong all these years. Again, I swear to you that this woman does not lie to make herself look better. It just doesn't occur to her. I mean, I was in elementary school when she told me I was the result of a drunken attempt to get her ex-boyfriend to leave his wife for her. This woman is really a lot more honest than she should be, by all rights. So we've actually decided not to raise the issue with her. Either she's gone 50 years not

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Text - valeyard89 · 3h My wife is adopted (but found her bio mom) and did one of the genetic tests. Someone matched with her and asked if she knew such and such a name. She found out her bio dad wasn't married to the bio mom.... it was her boss. oops. | Reply 1 240 3 ...

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Text - ameliacantlove · 4h i took a DNA test & found i am ethnically 25% Ashkenazi. After 8 months of serious digging, I found out my grandpa (my father's dad) is not my father's biological father. -- I have since came into contact with my half-uncle, he's super nice & i enjoy chatting with him. i loved learning about my bio-grandpa & the rest of the family. we haven't told them & don't plan on it. i have a small family, my mothers father had recently passed away & it was such a great comfort to

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Text - _orange-soda_ • 3h I am the family secret, family discovered their brother/ cousin/son and his wife had 3 children and gave them all up for adoption - after matching with me through a DNA test. They were shocked to say the least, but we're all pretty close now. Reply 1 85 ...

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Text - dazeyd · 3h A woman over in Chicago decided to find out who her real parents were. She was getting close to 60 and realized that there may not be much time left to find her father. So through the magic of ancestry she was matched to my grandfather. She seached out to him and told him who her mother was. He didn't recognize the name but dug up his little black book and lo and behold...there she was. So now l've got a new aunt! Reply 4 38 ...

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Tagged: crazy , surprising , askreddit , dna test , family , Reddit , dramatic

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Management Pays Rent On Equipment, Wastes Tens of Thousands

Anyone who's ever been tempted by anything at Rent-A-Center has done the math and decided it's a stupid idea to rent a TV, so why are corporate big wigs getting away with the business version of the same thing? It seems like almost anyone would be better at budgeting than these suits. For another genius move by management, here's a time management illegally banned overtime pay and IT got it all back.

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Text - Posted by u/calladus 2 days ago 97 3 6 "The $15,000 equipment is too expensive for your department to purchase. Why don't you just rent it for $48,000 a year?" oc M Back in the days when 33.6kbps modems were hot shit, I worked for the engineering department of a growing company. This company had started small. It was privately owned, and the VPs had all put in a portion of their own money to start the company. By this time in the story, they were finally making a respectable 30-40 million

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Text - Our engineering department was designing circuit boards with embedded computer systems. And to program these, instead of soldering the microcomputer to the board, we would solder on a microcontroller socket, and then plug in an "In Circuit Emulator" that would pretend it was a microcontroller, and allow the programmer to create the required program. This In Circuit Emulator, or ICE, was made by Hitachi. It plugged into a free PCI slot on your PC, and had a ribbon cable that would attach t

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Text - And we were renting it. It cost $4,000 a month. The first month we had it, our CTO and Marketing VP planned our whole new product line around this family of microcontrollers. So, at the end of the month, us engineers ask management to buy this for us. Since we would be using it for a while. The Engineering VP saw the price tag, and told us to just rent it. Surely we would be done with it soon. Engineers, being practical, forgot about the objection and just put our noses to the wheel. The

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Text - After a year, the VP of Finance asked about this recurring contract line item. They called the engineer who had originally started the contract. The engineer helpfully forwarded the approval from the Engineering VP, and his later email asking to buy it, and the VP's reply where he demurred. By the end of the week, this toy was ours. Along with a second one, since finance determined that product rollout was being affected by not enough access to the equipment. Hitachi just gave us the firs

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Text - Downtown_Let 2 days ago Some companies are really stupid on this kind of thing. One company I worked at there was a simple tool that was only used by a few departments, but cost about $50. Our department wanted to buy one as it often wasted a lot of time locating it and retrieving it from another department, but company forced a long winded procurement process and deemed it wasteful to have two when they were rarely used. Over just a few weeks you ended up having highly paid engineers ear

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Text - goddessabove 2 days ago Reminds me of the company I work for. Our store had trailers in the back of the store for excess freight and fixtures. Company decides they no longer want any trailers. We had five or ten trailers that the company we would rent extras from during peak times would actually pay the store to allow to stay on our property. Store manager said they had to go. Lost out on income, and now pay $4,000 a month for each of the 30 or so trailers we rent from october to January.

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Tagged: wtf , manager , work , engineering , rent , lol , incompetence , ridiculous , equipment , story , cheap , money , stupid

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Dude Accidentally Steals Identical Van

How many tales of mistaken identity end with accidentally stealing someone's car for 45 minutes? This guy noticed something was off after he noticed the car seats. Good thing there weren't any kids in them. People make incredibly stupid mistakes all the time, like this woman who had groceries delivers and failed all over the place.

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Text - r/tifu - Posted by u/Air911 21 hours ago O TIFU by accidentally stealing a car I drove my wife's van to work to save miles on the lease. I parked it, and she has the keyless start so I just left the keys right in the car (who's going to steal a car out of my work parking lot after all). Anyway, at lunch I like to drive over to our other building that's down the street to play pool with some buddy's. I did that, stayed for about 45 mins and headed back. But, as I was driving back I noticed

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Text - looked around to observe the rest of the newly cleaned auto, out of my peripheral I caught a glimpse of something in the back seat..."What is that??" my brain said to me. I looked back, and it's a car seat...A car seat??..My youngest son is 7!! We don't have a car sea! What's happening?!!?...And as the adrenaline rushes through my veins, I finally realize, I'm in the wrong car!!!! I got in a van, that is the same color, yr/make/model as my wife's, parked 3 spaces over from mine, and ALSO

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Text - As I pull into the parking lot I half expect there to be police waiting for me. I pray that the spot is still open, but of course it isn't. I find a spot that's relatively close. I have no choice but to confess my sins, so I go right to security and tell them what happened. The security girl bursts out laughing in my face. But, tells me to give her the plate number and she'll email the person and tell them what happened.

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Text - I never heard about it again from the car owner or security. But I told people at my work about it, and people still say "Are you sure you got the right car!" And think they're the only ones to say it. this was a few months ago btw, I just realized it fit pretty good here. I took a video in the car right after I realized what happened if you want to see https://youtu.be/jofnk-QkioA TL; DR I accidentally got in the wrong car at work and drove away in it (push start with keys in it). Kept i

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Tagged: wtf , lookalike , FAIL , stealing , cars , lol , ridiculous , dumb , mistake

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Totally Random, Strange, And On Point Tumblr Gems

We can always count on the multitude of rabbit holes prevalent throughout the wild world of Tumblr to keep us entertained as we muddle through this strange existence. You never quite know what you're going to get from Tumblr. Sometimes, it's a thread on what it's like to become a literal ant god. Other times, you get the thread on the intergalactic adventures of a weaponized Roomba. These particular Tumblr gems are certainly worth the time.

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Text - glumshoe what does it mean when someone says they're pescatarian and vegan teaboot Land animals are innocent of crime but The Fish have Sinned

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Text - Text - vampireapologist college professor just said “you're probably too young to even remember this" and brought up something that happened in 2011 light-em-up-benzedrine Better than my professer that said we'd “probably recognize this from Saturday morning cartoons" then showed us a cartoon from 1935... aluminumapples New immortal vs. old immortal

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Text - Text - NOT FLAT CAECKEL They were handing these out to people touring NASA and I have been staring at it for the last 20 minutes trying to decide if it's funny or just plain sad. olofahere "NOT FLAT" is a little sad. "WE CHECKED" is hilarious.

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Text - Text - unfollower peekaboo is essentially just making fun of babies for not understanding object permanence hamfootsia #i've made fun of babies for less 403,395 notes

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Text - Text - RE tilthat TIL plants make caffeine to defend themselves against pests. Caffeine is toxic to birds, dogs, cats, and it has a pronounced adverse effect on mollusks, various insects, and spiders. via reddit.com icedsilver Coffee plant: *evolves caffeine* Safe at last Humans: () xekstrin Why are we like this.... one-for-all-plus-ultra the fact that we can't drink sea water even tho its the most common type of water just bc its 3% salt yet we can safely consume multiple forms of litera

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Text - Text - Professor X ask a girl, "so, what's your mutant power"? Girl: "I can guess how many pulls to turn a ceiling fan off on the first try!" Professor X: "oh really?" Girl [points up]: “ 2 pulls" Professor X: [stands up and pulls twice] “not bad kid, but not a power". Girl: "Im kidding, i can heal paraplegics" Professor x: [still standing] "HOLY SHIT" 7,008 notes ...

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Text - themiscyra1983 Peppers: Now that I have capsaicin, no mammal will eat me! ONLY BIRDS. THE BIRDS WILL SPREAD MY SEEDS. Humans: oh my god this burns so good Peppers: wut jumpingjacktrash poppies: at last, i have evolved my sap to the point where anything that eats me will sleep... FOREVER humans who are about to invent painkillers: hey guess what

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Text - Text - İLovePizza Just tried watermelon on pizza. Honestly? It was pretty good. 9 Reply from MithcellStone: That's him, officer, that's the guy right there, take the shot before he gets away. Shout out to Spider-Man PS4 for having one of the best fake social media feeds ranty9000 Follow More accurate portrayal of how this generation acts than the entirety of "life is strange" thadeeliv Follow i thought this was a real post for a minute

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Text - Text - cacklebarnacle tobacco: finally i can grow in peace, no more insects munching on my leaves. humans holding matches: my, my, what do we have here? doctornanitesreblogs Mint: Stay off me bugs or l'll poison you! Humans: Yeah l'm gonna need to put this poison in my dessert and mix it with chocolate. theindependentconservative Aliens Studying the Planet: nervous laughter* What the fuck?

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Text - Text - americanairliines-deactivated20 Just a simple PSA Cannon = thing that goes boom Canon = an event that occurs within a published story kankripeixes Follow they both destroy ships tho parenyzia Follow Did you just corsaircourser Follow BOOM

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Text - Text - rslashrats i think some of you need to eat a slice of cheesecake and listen to ambient rain noises ten hours unholystigmatas Follow I want you to know I did this exact thing yesterday and it was so surreal seeing this post I thought | wrote it in my sleep rslashrats you are one of my sims 14,182 notes

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Text - Text - Asked my uber driver how long he's been uber driving and he said "I never started" and then I laughed and then he didn't laugh & then we rode in silence for 10 minutes and then I sneezed & he said "what was that sound you just made" and I said "a sneeze" & he said "okay". 5 stars 5/20/18, 12:14 AM littlemonarch 5 stars bc it's clearly his first day on earth

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Text - Text - weavemama me: *on my laptop* windows: *having a nervous meltdown* ARE YOU GONNA UPDATE YOUR COMPUTER???? WHEN ARE YOU GONNA UPDATE????? TODAY AT 7:00 PM????? TOMORROW AT 5:50 AM??????? CAN YOU DO IT NOW????? MAKE A DECISION IMMEDIATELY OR GOD SO HELP ME gaysaladbar windows is the duolingo owl in disguise

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Text - Text - writing-prompt-s You run a tattoo parlor. Every couple of weeks, the same customer comes in, always requesting the same tattoo: an additional tally mark on an ever-growing cluster of tally marks. th4nkyoub3n "what are you counting" "how many tattoos i've gotten" "i'm no longer serving you"

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Text - Text - spacefroggity Follow I think it'd be pretty funny if the next time an adult tells me l'm being Rude And DisrespectfulTM I just went "ya it's because I don't respect you" and watch the gates of hell open before me spacefroggity Follow Telling a boomer they're not automatically entitled to my respect just to feel something

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Text - Text - paperandpencilsandskips grant proposal to fuck around and find out paperandpencilsandskips Give me 100 million dollars I have theories spyglassrealms "fuck around and find out" is literally the scientific method, provided you record how you fucked around and what you found out paperandpencilsandskips i will not

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Text - thats-slightly-raven: feistie: thats-slightly-raven: I JUST BURNT MY HAND ON MY LAMP TRYING TO TURN IT OFF LAMPS SHOULD NOT BE HOT ENOUGH TO GIVE YOU THIRD DEGREE BURNS THIS IS BULLSHIT. maybe if you'd go outside and used natural sunlight instead of running your lamp for 13 hours straight, this wouldn't happen :) OH I'M SORRY IT'S 3:38AM LET ME JUST WAKE UP THE SUN SO I CAN SIT OUTSIDE WITH MY SKINLESS BURNT HAND AND BASK IN THE GLORY OF NATURAL DAYLIGHT. a thats-slightly-raven

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Tagged: humor , tumblr , ridiculous , funny tumblr

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Weirdest Things H.R. Employees Have Seen

This wild AskReddit thread has human resources employees describing the weirdest stuff they've ever seen, on the job. People are full of surprises. One certainly wouldn't want to find themselves sharing a space with any of these folks. We're talking about some serious curveballs.

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Text - thedarlingbuttsofmay • 2h I once had a temp job in HR. I was scanning lots of old personnel files, and the one perk of the job was reading old complaints against people. The best one I came across was a mediation caused by one member of staff accusing another of witchcraft.

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Text - StaceysDad • 2h The maintenance guy had been living up above the ceiling of the building. He had built a little cubby living area with electricity and a small fridge and everything. Edit: For years.

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Text - TenDollarTicket • 2h F 2 Awards Years ago I worked HR for a retail store. A manager would always clock out on time however the alarm wouldn't be set until about 30-45 min after he clocked out. Since we had a lot of trouble with internal theft we assumed he was stealing. Loss prevention approved the installation of cameras across all stores but we were told not to talk about it to see if we could catch any internal theft. The way the ceiling was set up,the cameras weren't too obvious but i

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Text - Blueiguana1976•4h O 1 Award I was a recruiter, and you would be shocked to see what some people actually have as their personal email. Most people have come around to using just their name, but then every once in a while you'll have to verify that "brownglitter69" is in fact how they would like to be contacted.

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Text - smokefrog2 · 3h I work HR for a call center. Entire company has around 500 employees, maybe 250 of them are in the call center. Entry level work, tiny bit more than minimum wage. A girl started her first week doing really well and then week two got really weird. She walked into the CEO's office (on another floor in the building) WHILE HE WAS MEETING WITH SOMEONE, to demand that he buy her a dog because she thought having a companion would improve her work performance. That was the entiret

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Text - McNugget_Princess • 3h The new receptionist was coming in every morning and opening up programs/documents to make it look like they were busy, and they'd sit with one hand on their mouse and one hand on their keyboard and stare blankly at their screen for 8 hours a day and not do anything. They'd also consistently pick up the phone and hang it up without saying anything so that it would stop ringing. I sat in on their termination, and the employee started screaming at the manager about ho

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Text - T469 • 2h I work at my family's business in the industrial sector, and HR is one of the hats I wear. 2018 was insanely busy for us, so we had to hire a staffing agency to get some General Labor guys in. It's a simple wax-on, wax-off kind of job. The most memorable part of that hectic summer was one temp that the agency sent over for 3rd shift (Midnight-8AM). We will call him Bobby for this story. Bobby shows up wearing nothing but a pair of cargo shorts, so we had to provide pants, shirt,

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Text - Canuckleball • 1h Guy came in to the interview in sweatpants and a hoodie, and said he didn't need the job because of how much money he was making illegally, but he wanted to have a job so the IRS didn't get suspicious. Weirdest part is I don't live in America, I very much doubt the IRS cares about Canadian tax returns.

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Text - Savgrod96 • 2h Hi. I'm not in HR but my mom has been for quite a while. A few years ago when my mom worked at an automotive plant, my mom had an issue with an employee who would clock in on time and then dissapear. She asked another of the floor employees if they had seen him and was told "he's in the parking lot." So, my mom and one of her co-workers went out to the parking lot and found the employee asleep in his car. Apparently, he'd been clocking in and immediately going out to his ca

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Text - testreddit01LP • 2h I don't work at HR but remember one time, a girl HR started working on a software company, she got her pc hacked (I think he remote her desktop and typed in a notepad) by an IT member with a "wanna date me?" message. weird.

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Text - Championpyro • 2h Younger guy brought a toddler and baby in a stroller to his interview. He expected me (front desk) to watch them while he interviewed. I mean thanks for making the effort to come in and interview, but l'm not responsible for your kids.

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Text - Poeticlandmermaid2 • 1h Someone put their social security number on their resume.

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Tagged: employee , job , work , cringe , askreddit , ridiculous , weird

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Products That Are Too Marked Up For Their Own Good

Just about everything is a little bit of a racket. Hell, if everything was sold at cost, there'd be no reason for anyone to run a business. It's when businesses use brand sway and deceitful practices to drive insane markups that things start to seem unfair and hairy. Even if you are spending a lot on movie theater sodas and designer eyeglasses, at least you're not following these bits of the dumbest financial advice people have gotten. On the other side of it, here are reckless uses of money that people didn't regret at all.

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Text - asecretspy 1 day ago O 2 2 3 5 & 2 More College textbooks on their 2nd to 100th edition.

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Text - suestrong315 1 day ago Bathtubs... specifically fiberglass You can buy a $900 -$1200 bathtub or shower and it will be a giant piece of shit. It won't have enough gelcoat on it, or enough fiberglass backing, and they're paper thin with airvoids that are as brittle as egg shells. Dare to drop something in it? You may get lucky and just get a ding, or maybe the gelcoat will fucking shatter like your windshield at which point fixing it becomes a world class nightmare when you try and paint it

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Text - 101forgotmypassword 1 day ago 22 3 Printer cartridges.

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Text - > Magazines192 1 day ago 2 Any cable (usb, hdmi etc). They cost pennies to make 35.3k . Reply Share Report Save mockg 1 day ago Company I used to work for would give us cables at the price they purchased them for. I would get HDMI and cell phone cables that would retail at $15-$20 for around $1-$2.

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Text - HIPS79 1 day ago 34 E Carbonated beverages and popcorn are what keep restaurants and movie theatres in business.

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Text - SlytherinGirl125 1 day ago 3 Makeup - that shit is produced cheap, especially the high end brands 28.2k + I Reply Share Report Save jengiekat 1 day ago · edited 1 day ago This!! Most cosmetics in general basically. Part of why most makeup stores have such relaxed return policies... Eyeshadow palettes cost like 20 cents each to manufacture and sell for $50.

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Text - GlutonForPUNishment 1 day ago Baby clothes are marked up by 1000% on average

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Text - Scaryassmanbear 1 day ago O 29 e10 & 28 More Insulin

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Text - ParaPixie 1 day ago Sodium Chloride IV bags in hospitals in the United States. It costs less than $1 to make but hospitals can charge over $200+ per bag.

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Text - Basically, if you have a strong prescription (+- ~3 or so) aspheric can make a much thinner and lighter lens that can give you the same vision a thicker traditional lens does. Add in anti-scratch ($) anti-reflective ($) and the cost of the lenses alone were around $400 for the customer. Pearle Vision's cost for the lense blanks? $23. The entire cost of the Essilor equipment in the lens lab at my location was only ~$250000, and we regularly sold $800+ glasses. And, the part that I really h

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Text - DownBad1 1 day ago I'll never forget learning that the movie theater I worked at paid $5 for a 24 pack of Dasani bottles. We charged $4.50 for 1.

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Text - Willis644 1 day ago a S 2 Epi-pens. They cost like 2 bucks to make and then are sold for like $150

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Text - aeleisha3941 1 day ago O 2 Barrettes, hair clips and other bits of plastic that hold your hair in place. I get these at dollar stores because the high-end pharmacies charge way too much.

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Text - brkh47 1 day ago · edited 1 day ago Designer handbags, at least in recent years to meet the demand of the newly rich. There's a huge industry of Chinese immigrant workers in Tuscany, Italy, who manufacture the bags there, so that it can bear the coveted "Made in Italy" label They are perhaps not that cheaply made but still not the value of the prices they command.

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Text - kouch 1 day ago S E Ibuprofen at a hospital. "Yeah, we just went and got this bottle from the dollar store for $4. Oh, that patient needs two of them? Sure, charge their bill $88."

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Text - dude7271 1 day ago · edited 1 day ago 3 Beats headphones cost $17.00 to make, and are sold for $100 - $500 That's insane

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Text - matanpokoj2 1 day ago 9 e2 Someone once said " 'They asked the company why they were selling their product for $200 if it costs $10 to make it?' And the company responded 'because people buy them for $200' "

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Text - PS6610 1 day ago 3 New build houses in the UK! Built by the lowest bidder, to the lowest standards possible. Crammed in so densely that two "detached" houses can be less than 18 inches apart. The biggest scam is that the developers try to sell the house, but retain ownership of the land that it's built on, then charge rent for the land. For this shit they want a minimum of £350,000.

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Text - Back2Bach 1 day ago Glaucoma eyedrops - about $379 for a tiny bottle of the prescription treatment.

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Text - RonSwansonsOldMan 1 day ago Those $350 Nikes cost maximum 20 bucks to make, shipping included. Oh, and the 15 hundred dollar ones also cost about 20 bucks to make.

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Text - Skywest96 1 day ago · edited 1 day ago Crêpes. We make them often at home here in France. 250g of flour, two eggs some milk, maybe butter, you get 25 crepes for what, 4 euros of groceries. Some street foods in Paris or other big cities will sell them 4 or 5 euros sometimes. And they buy the ingredients in big bulks at cheaper prices so they make an even bigger margin. They make 100 euros of crêpes for 3 euros of batter and add the toppings, let's say 7 euros for a pot of nutella, sugar an

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Text - manzare 1 day ago Homeopathic pills. There is nothing in it, no money used for clinical trials. Sold for around 7- 10 euros per box.

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Text - ConstableBlimeyChips 1 day ago French fries/chips/whatever you want to call them. McDonalds buys its potatoes at around 20 cents to the pound. You can get about four medium fries ($1.79) out of a pound of potatoes. Even if transport, labor, and other overhead triples the cost that's still a profit margin well over 1000%. Margins on soda are even higher while burgers and other items have more ingredients and complexity and are thus more expensive to produce.

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Text - NicNoletree 1 day ago Wedding cakes 1 1.2k + Reply Share Report Save aussiegreenie 1 day ago 4 Wedding eakes anythings Anything related to a wedding is double to 10x the normal cost.

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Text - mhatrick 1 day ago A lot flipped houses. Be careful when looking at recently remodeled houses. Most of these are cheap flips with nothing more than some new paint, flooring and appliances. It becomes very apparent when you actually view the house in person and the doors don't close right, the windows are old, and everything just feels cheap

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Text - ammarbinaslam 1 day ago Himalayan Salt - in Pakistan, we get that shit in like 0.20 cents but I've heard it being expensive in UK & US

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Text - Loga5655 1 day ago Crocs 388 Reply Share Report Save sitmonkey 1 day ago True, those clogs use a sorta complicated mold but that's it. There's no manual labor to put them together or fabrics or stitching. It's cheap foam. So you can find generic versions on other countries with the same quality and the cost is a couple bucks.

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Text - Vanilla_Neko 1 day ago Remember that alleged art piece that was a banana duct tape to a wall that some Chad just straight up ate 1 242 + , Reply Share Report Save MuhWaifus 1 day ago After its sale, while still on exhibit at Art Basel, Georgian performance artist David Datuna ate the piece, calling the intervention Hungry Artist. The banana was replaced later that day. No legal action was taken against him, though he was asked to leave the fair. Datuna has stated "What we perceive as mate

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Text - LibrarySuper9362 1 day ago Shoes. As a 3rd generation shoe repair shop owner, shoes are literally made from landfill junk. S0 many middle aged woman crawling out of their range rovers and into our shop complaining that the leather on their very expensive boots is peeling off. Well yes ma'am, those $350 MK boots are made of vinyl, they're not real leather. You bought plastic.

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Tagged: cost , horrible , wtf , markup , ridiculous , expensive , company , cheap , business , money , FAILS , internet memes

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Low-Life Landlord Dealt Justice By Tenant

Anyone who enjoys seeing sweet justice getting dealt out will get a kick out of this. We have a low-life landlord, who quite simply, gets their comeuppance to the satisfying tune of having to pay up, then having assets at their place of business seized, and then having the same money returned.

If this landlord revenge got you going, we recommend checking out this story of the landlord who refused to give the tenant back their deposit, so a court revenge followed. Similar in tone, and again, oh so satisfying.

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Text - r/ProRevenge u/calcteacher • 159d + JOIN 1 3 3 Revenge on the lowlife landlord who first deprived us of heat and later kept our security deposit I responded to this post https://redd.it/e243q0 and had a mini blow up, with many encouraging me to repost it here, so here it is. I was a kid back in the 80s 2 years out of college when I

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Text - moved into an apartment by the shore in NJ. When the cold weather arrived, there was always a few days when the apartment was cold, we would tell the super, and then the heat would start arriving. One year the heat started decreasing in February, and inside the apartment was like in the 50s and we had to start wearing coats. We told the super about it and nothing happened this time. We wrote the landlord about it, and still nothing. So we checked with an attorney and learned about warrant

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Text - Flash forward to living there for 6 years, on the last lease because we are about to buy a home, we write in a clause that we can break the lease with 45 days notice in writing, similar to his 45 day clause. They don't notice it because it's slightly obscured on the top left of page 2, so they sign off on it and return it to me. So in the middle of the lease, we give the 45 day written notice, make the rent payments, and leave. They don't return our deposit, so we sue for it, demanding do

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Text - We arrive at the courthouse and court forces a round of arbitration. The arbitrator says we will lose in front of the judge and to pay the rent remainderments. We refuse and wait for the judge. While waiting the landlord's attorney drops by and asks why we didn't take the arbitrator's advice, so we tell him about the clause we wrote in, and he states he saw it too, and that since it was crossed out, it's not part of the deal. We show him our copy of the lease where it's not crossed out, a

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Text - We go to see the judge. He looks at both leases and calls their attorney to the bench. The judge takes our lease, and thrusts it toward their attorney and says, "This is the lease in force." Their attorney starts walking around the courtroom like a chick with his head cut off, while I try to laugh as quietly as possible. The judge finds for us for double damages. We receive nothing for a week, and I go back to the courthouse where the clerk says, they should pay that judgment immediately,

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Text - Another month passes and we get a call from the court. They have our money. I told them the landlord had sent a check a while back so all it good. She tells us that we should have informed the court that we got the money to stop the chattel execution from occurring. The court sent the sheriff to their offices and confiscated office equipment and sold it at auction to satisfy the judgment ! They said don't worry, they will just return the money to the landlord. That is the revenge, getting

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Tagged: landlord , satisfying , revenge , awesome , Reddit , apartment , justice , tenant

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Pun Business Names That Really Went For It

Does a business with a funny name make it a better business? Honestly, no. And in some case, like going to a chiropractor with a silly name would probably feel like a deal breaker. Who in this world wants their spine guy to be full of dad jokes? That said we can't fault these entrepreneurs for hinging the success of their business on a silly name they thought of.

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Window - VIA DEL GAMBARO TECH IT EASY TECH ITEASY

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Lighting - THAI TANIC 1326A ADVENTURES OF THAI CUISINE SPELE

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Stool - LORD RINSE THE SHOP LAUNDRY 三LA LIMA EILA,

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Awning - PITA PAN A SHISH KEBAB FALAFEL SALAD BAR JUICE BAR FREE DELIVERY Tet: 718-832-3876/4531

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Advertising - Watdot Secedito ABRA KEBABRA faste the dilfennes 日

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Property - (028) 302 The Codfather www.beslpropetyservices Tradilional Fish & Chips

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Property - 135 Richmond Rd Ozu 8974 6300 IRON MAIDEN PROFESSIONAL IRONING SERVICE

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Retail - Tequilamockingbind mencan GUNESS S

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Window - 巴出 FRYING NEMO FISH & FISH & CHIPS CHIPS

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Text - Amy's Winehouse A FINE SELECTION OF CHAMP GNE, WINES WALH SPIRITS & BEERS FROM AROUND THE WORLD CODE HOC CR

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Real estate - Florist Gump Tel. 624273 www.foristgump Diz

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Facade - BREAD ZEPPELIN SALADS ELEVATED (140 TTOL

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Retail - Sew it Seams Clothing Alterations - Same Day Service

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Stairs - AVRILLIVING FURNITURE.INTERIORS VAILLUVING PLT 30%

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Property - WE DO DELIVERY LETS US CATER YOUR PARTY 310-360-2939 Absolutely PHO. BULOUS Ra Canine

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Concrete - THORASSIC PARK 21ST CENTURY CHIROPRACTIC

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Glass - DARTHVAPER PREMIUM ELECTRONIC CIGARETTES & SUPPLIES Www.DARTHVAPER.CO.UK Tel: 07460 377509 dvaper@ymail.com D 5 x Sml Bottles Save s SAVE fes ty nd START E

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Furniture - FUCKOFFEE Girls Girls Girls eKGANIC INTERNET BICYCLES W AWARD WINNING SANDWI PET FRIENDLY WE SOURCE LECALLY FRESH HOT SSUF FRE Wi F ZON 47

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Door - Mileston &Collis BEAUTY AND THE BEACH 020 8744 935 milestone-collis.c LET BY 020 8892 7999 wwbeadedhbc ty and the Beach YOUR IMAGE IS OU ASION Dermaingicafaca dermalogica PL Laer tratnent dine Wrinkle Trtments Miondemabraion Lyeon hotwa Bralian and Halywod Spray tan dermalogica Thding ARTED 020 8892 7999 power aautyandthebeachsalon.co uk tree gica

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Facade - Barber BRITISH HAIRWAYS walk in Shop Service Tel: 236 6922 FAST TAN SUNBEDS AVAILABLE HERE. B. H. BARBER SHOP B. H. BARBER SHOP

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Door - BOTES MESTERN INDIANA JEANS BOULET 1410 ERVE

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Window - | PLANET OF THE GRAPES WINES & SPIRITS 020 7405 4912 NETOFTHEGRAPES.CO.UK

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Tagged: wtf , jokes , puns , lol , amazing , business , funny , internet memes

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Dudes Avoid Chaotic Evil With Skimpy Outfits And Love

Tumblr did a good thing with this fun and wild little story about a Professor who dodged ultimate danger, with some skimpy clothing and kindness. Seriously, whether this story is real or not, it is amazing. Just picturing a bunch of laughing, smiling dudes out on an adventure, dancing and entertaining for their kicks at night, taking none of it seriously, is enough to warm the heart. Glad to hear that they managed to avoid a perilous predicament.

Take in some more fun from Tumblr with this post about how dwarves have intelligent super beards.

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Text - kvinnfolk wanna hear a wild story? my brother's history professor is closing in on 80 and basically lives at the university. one night my brother visited him for a meeting, and it came up that my brother was gonna be performing as a court jester at the castle the following day. and his professor busts out: "ah, that reminds me of my youth!" he then proceeded to tell the tale of when he and his friends went backpacking to greece back in their early 20s. then one day they found themselves c

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Text - after a week or so they gained some traction, and a gang of young greek men walked up to them like “hey y'all are cool as hell, can we join y'all for drinks tonight?" and my brother's professor was like "of course! y'all have to wear these revealing outfits and do somersaults with us tho" and the greek gang said "sounds dope. y'all are invited to live with us for however long y'all want." anyhow, they proceeded to live like this for the better part of 3 months, doing shows, drinking, and

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Text - half a year later my brother's professor gets contacted by the greek police. they ask him about the months they spent in greece, and then informs him that their greek friends have been convicted of serial homicide and robbery. that the group of young greek men had joined up with several tourist groups for several years "for drinks", and then killed and robbed them all, terrorising the beach city for several years. with one exception, of course, because “this one group of swedish acrobats

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Tagged: history , tumblr , Professors , ridiculous , dangerous , funny tumblr , school , university , funny

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Tumblr Thread: The Wacky Nature Of Sci-Fi Translation

Perhaps humanity really is "moon moon" then. We never quite know what we'll get next from the wonderful and wandering minds of the ever entertaining Tumblr world. In this case, we've got a great little Tumblr thread that points out the inherent fascinating nature of the Sci-fi translation. Check out some more gold from Tumblr with this thread about becoming an ant god.

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Text - alice-and-cheshire-cat Follow foone Follow @Foone Here's the question I always have with universal translators in sci-fi: how do they know when to stop translation? Like say an alien asks about deserts on earth, and the human lists "the sahara desert, gobi desert and kalahari desert" Alien: You just said "desert" six times.

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Text - foone @Foone · 24h ("Sahara" is Arabic for "desert". "Gobi" is Mongolian for "desert", and "Kalahari" is Tswana for "desert") t7 67 342 foone @Foone · 24h Man, the aliens are going to think we're so bad at naming. Cause really, aren't we? Brit: Behold, the beautiful River Avon! Alien: Ahh, the River River. You humans have such a knack for naming things. t7 50 O 336

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Text - foone @Foone 24h "Here we are in Chad, looking upon the mighty Lake Chad!" "Ahh yes, the land of Lake, bordering the Lake Lake. Another fine human name. t3 40 ♡ 301 foone @Foone · 24h "And here's Nyanza Lac, in Burundi. As you can tell by the fact that it's named Lake Lake in Bantu & French, it's a la. actually this one's a city. A city named Lake Lake"

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Text - petermorwood Google Translate vs. German (the original was longer, this is long enough...) Russisch talienisch Deutsch Sprache erkennen Die Volkswirtschaftslehre (auch Nationalokonomie, Wirtschaftliche Staatswissenschaften oder Sozialokonomie, kurz VWL), ist ein Teilgebiet der Wirtschaftswissenschaft| 166/5000

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Text - Deutsch Englisch Franzósisch Übersetzen The economics of economics (including economics, economics, economics, economics, economics, economics) is a part of economics. I Anderung vorschlagen catd2014 I grew up near Pendle Hill, Lancashire (recently featured in Doctor Who) which is Hill Hill Hill

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Text - dndidiots But what if aliens are equally bad at naming things because of the nature of their interstellar lives. They show us a star map and this happens: Alien: This is the Xyzzeryx Zyxxeryv. Human Diplomat: *pauses* Human Diplomat: *turns to his translator* If you serious think for a second they named this system the star star system I am firing you on the spot.

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Text - ayamccabre OK but consider: what if they have no word for desert? So the Sahara desert goes through the translation software and comes out as a waterless, desolate area of land with little or no vegetation, typically one covered with sand a waterless, desolate area of land with little or no vegetation, typically one covered with sand

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Text - doodled93 And at once, all of humanity was Moon Moon #goddamnit moon moon 38,954 notes

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Tagged: tumblr , interesting , sci fi , ridiculous , science fiction , funny tumblr

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Tumblr Thread: Dwarves Have Intelligent Super Beards

This right here is what the internet is for. Good old Tumblr does it again. We're still not over that recent thread where Tumblr went full mythological scientist. This might be even better. Yes, this particular rabbit hole takes us along for the exploration of dwarves' super beards. It's fun. The thread suggests that dwarves' beards are these intelligent defense mechanisms that evolved due to the stresses of their environment. All that mining for gems and treasures can be risky business without proper face protection.

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Text - deluxeloy Theory: So you know how dwarves have that thing with beards? What if that's not just a cultural standard or mere coincidence? What if there's a reason? See, dwarves like to dig a lot. They build underground homes, and there's nothing more rewarding to them than digging up some gems or valuable metals. But chipping away at all that rock and disturbing all that earth kicks up a lot of dust and dirt. If you do that every day without proper breathing protection (which Ancient Dwarve

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Text - phenomenon we see with real miners too; eventually, they develop a host of respiratory-related problems and even lung cancer. Now, if only dwarves had some sort of natural protection against all that fine dust. If only they had some sort of filter in front of their mouth an nose... My theory states that, through natural selection, dwarves developed more and more dense facial hair as a defense mechanism. mysral It should be noted that this interpretation also

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Text - supports the "female dwarves have beards too" line of thought. It makes very little sense for half the population not to have that intrinsic protection, after all.. aegipan-omnicorn This world-building has me legit grinning. I like this one. athelind This suggests that the micro-structures of dwarf beard hair are a lot more complex than ordinary hair, possibly including skin oils or other compounds with antimicrobial properties.

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Text - It also suggests that some of the dwarven durability reflected in their tabletop game Constitution bonuses are because they have built-in HEPA filters. And that in turn suggests that shaving a dwarf's beard or causing magical hair loss would have negative health impacts for the individual in question, suddenly breathing unfiltered air for the first time. Asthma, allergies, bronchitis, even pneumonia. aegipan-omnicorn Now that you mention it, l'm imagining each dwarven hair having micro-ba

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Text - Also, that their beards may be a microscopic ecosystem with unique species of lice, etc. living within their beards that would feed on the spores and microbes caught within it. Thus, making their beards 'self cleaning' - unlike a man-made HEPA filter, the beards don't get clogged over time. cipheramnesia And dwarves love and care and decorate their beards so much because like... it's not just accessory, it's a whole face terrarium. Just like anyone else with a plant or a fish, some people

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Text - extra pretty or minimalist or whatever style. Plus of course you may have exotic variations based on environment, because the air and rocks could be different. Touching a dwarf beard or heavens forbid tugging it is like running up to a fish tank in a stranger's house and tapping the glass - you don't do that. Dwarven beard care is like gardening and owning a pet rolled into one. dungeonmalcontent This is the only truth I will accept about dwarven beards now.

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Tagged: fantasy , tumblr , dwarves , awesome , funny tumblr

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History Memes That Are Better Than Book Learning

If there's one benefit to learning history (other than developing a keener understanding of the world and your context in it) it's getting sweet history memes. Knowing what happened to various astronauts or the attitudes of different colonial powers may not win you any popularity contests, but it sure is fun to look at history memes and become one with time.

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Animation - *caveman eats a berry and dies in agony *other cavemen be like* Write that down, write that down!

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Finger - Plato after deciding that only philosophers could be kings Everyone is stupid except me

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Cheek - GIVE ME BACK MY LEGIONS! Who are you? How did you get into my house? I found Rome a city of Bricks... and left it a city of marble

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Face - The CIA declassifying documents from the Cold War Was all this legal? Absolutely fucking not.

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Organism - The Mongols pillaging Asia and killing 10% of the world population The Mongols when it came to freedom of religion

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Font - Being tolerant to other religions Killing every one equally Mongols

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Nose - You think this is funny? Vikings naming an island covered 90% in ice Greenland

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Animation - Medieval peasants when the local priest is preaching in Latin: He is speaking the language of god

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Text - historicalevents Follow Wareieghants cecrited paiopdap lamuda yue Set or atleact seceal years at one yoint en ittory One oft ecniteet or deploymet of seall mtrbers of war eleyhaots at one poant an httory War elegees ot ఊడి Historical range of the use of war elephants throughout history thedogopera Follow me, a simple English pikeman watching a war elephant rampaging through Kent: wots all this then

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Finger - 16th century Italian choirs when they needed a voice higher than a tenor

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Sleeve - Leoņardo Da Vinci predicting the helicopter in 1519: You're about...420 years too early.

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Text - Poland: *holds Prussia as vassal for 194 years* Prussia: *makes Poland be off the world map for 123 years* We're even now, bitch.

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Human - France : I'm not gonna help a damn colony to revolt U.S :It's agaisnt the brits France :

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Bicycle tire - 2George Washington America George Washington warning against a two party system America

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Nose - Napoleon: *visits the grave of Frederick the Great* Napoleon: Now here was a King! A truly great ruler! A truly great soldier! If he was still in charge I never would have conquered Prussia. The Current King of Prussia, standing right there:

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Product - Ottoman Empirelin 1683 Ottoman Empire in 1914

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Text - This onion won't make me cry Franz Ferdinand spent his final moments trying to comfort his wife, and ignored the bullet in his neck

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Face - German soldier who just transferred from the Eastern Front @mianauppe Guy who's been in the Western Front since 1914

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Head - Customer in Weimar Republic: WO WO How much is this loaf of bread? Shopkeeper in Weimar Republic: One billion gagillion fafillion shabadabalo shabadamillion shabaling shabalomillion marks

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Personal protective equipment - A history of military sucess One recent war lost ...

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Lip - Austria after every world war That wasn't me. That wasGermany

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Text - Elvis Presley's manager sold "I Hate Elvis" badges as a way to make money from people who weren't buying Elvis merchandise COLD @FreskyHistory TARAR I'm playing both sides, so that I always come out on top.

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Automotive lighting - A nuclear blast 0330 A wooden desk Kids during the Cold War

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Tagged: history memes , school , facts , history , lol , the past , education , knowledge , funny

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Funny Tumblr Moments and Sweet Ripened Tweets

Put a massive group of literate people together and what do you get? A pristine futuristic world of understanding, compassion and justice? Hell naw, you get weird stories, stupid jokes, funny tweets and tumblr gems to quote later. The internet is big enough for anyone digging through funny tumblr gems to find whatever their hearts desire.

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Font - Amaxx A @climaxximus me: I heard owen wilson is a master of disguise wife: wow me: [narrows eyes] 1:16 PM 12 Apr 20 · Twitter for Android

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Table - My girlfriend walked outside this morning to see this, a bunch of snails in a circle with leader in the middle... yourscientistfriend: ravibun: darecrow: We've found it Snail Church snurch Take me to snurch

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Font - Dee @figgled It's kinda fucked that musicians eat sandwiches by placing them inside trombones and honking them into each other's mouths 18/4/17, 12:32 pm skirtsuit-angel this is an example of defamiliarization, where something totally normal, conventional, and ordinary - like honkwiching - is taken and described as something that sounds weird and foreign Source: memewhore

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Font - MehGyver @AndrewNadeau0 [After leaving Willy Wonka's factory] ME: WIFE: МE: WIFE: МЕ: WIFE: Lot of deaths for a to- ME: A LOT of deaths for a tour!

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Window - 11 ziyal this shot of the joker pulling up his pants leg seems to imply that the white part of his feet is actually just bare skin, not fabric spats over a pair of dress shoes, as i had always assumed?? which means that the animated series joker has actually been wearing, like, kitten heeled pumps this entire time

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Liquid - sto pamstime E FIELENS DAIRY GUERNSE GOATS BUTTER BUTTEIC WHO YOU GONNA CALL GOATS BUTTER Helen's farm goats botter Guernsey butter saltad £1.90 25ög E7.60 kg 250g | LURDAK now Innocent pinvopple I ain't afraid of no goats. indirispeaks I am suspicious of the pineapple though. FARM RPAK

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Organism - Ha nah fam O @frluckaj Lmaooo0o in my Zoom lecture the prof asked if anyone had any questions and one kid used the 'Raise Hand' feature. Prof calls on him and he has the nerve to say 'No sorry I was just stretching' 12:15 · 09 Apr 20 · Twitter Web App 1,921 Retweets 16.9K Likes <>

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Vertebrate - Molly Hodgdon @Manglewood Ohru still using handheld beans? O 977 4:30 AM - Jan 4, 2015

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Organism - > protagonists are working class > villain is bourgeoise > villain's plan is to automate the production for profit > the day is saved by a state regulating bureau > the happy ending is the working class seizing the means of production Monsters Inc. is marxist propaganda

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Rectangle - Lizzy @thedirtbird Jelly. Baby needs jelly. 8 JELLY BABY NEEDS JELLY 15K 2:57 AM - Oct 12, 2015 i)

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Human body - flightcub my three favorite things are the oxford comma, irony, and missed opportunities flightcub.tumblr.com

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Rectangle - portentsofwoe you know what really gets my goat? aglaja el chupacabra Source: portentsofwoe 690,620 notes

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Organism - Dan Sheehan @ltsDanSheehan Is it a "We need to retrieve the orb" superhero movie" or a "we need to close the gate" superhero movie 6:02 PM · 2020-12-28 · Twitter Web App 448 Retweets 23 Quote Tweets 5,318 Likes

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Font - itistimetodisappear Anyone else constantly on edge because we are in the final stages of late capitalism and these next couple of decades are gonna be make or break for the western world, and this just happens to coincide with the part of my life where I'm supposed to make something of myself :/ f-ckmedead You didn't have to say it with words Source: itistimetodisappear

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Rectangle - supermoclel are you ever in the middle of saying something or showing someone something and you realize that literally no one cares Source: bonitapvta 808,156 notes

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Light - Dani Donovan ADHD Comics @danidonovan you HAVE to stop telling yourself you're going to make banana bread. you're not gonna make banana bread. just let them go, man. Banana 4011

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Font - Jennifer's addiction began at age five when she ate the seat of the family car. My Strange Aldietion ALL NEW TEC HD candyswords: what the actual fuck Jennifer

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Font - The District Demon @IntergalacticQ How my mom made me pump her gas when the DC sniper was active ** Queen J * @HeyMissQueen · 1d What's a story you can't wait to tell your grandkids?

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Font - Not Sara @smithsara79 Me: *slapping my older brother in the face with his own hand* haha stop hitting yourself, why are you hitting yourself Sister-in-law: *crying* is this why you wanted an open casket 4:31 PM - Dec 11, 2017 169 277,036 32,509

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Font - David Hughes @david8hughes [son hands me a picture he painted] Me: what's that Son: it's our house Me [walks outside with son]: do you see how it absolutely isn't?

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Cat - Living Morganism Y @ok_girlfri. · 1h This cat had a skin infection so her owner tried applying some turmeric to treat it. As a side effect, it turned her into Pikachu.

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Product - gabrielisnotamoosed Priest : Do you read to your children from the holy book? Me : yes Priest : What is their favourite part? Me : when frodo destroys the ring. #funny #puns #lol #lord of the rings #fr 13,708 notes

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Photograph - S just-finee -Give it to me! -No. A nepetwerk LOTR: a summary bloodelf cannot breathe Source: argaynine 169,126 notes 口回

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Font - photosbygy kinda wanna relationship, kinda wanna stay single my whole life, kinda wanna go on adventures, kinda wanna stay in my bed my whole life obtrta It's the Baggins side of your bloodline fighting the Took in you septembersung There are two wolves hobbits inside you prankprincess123 The Baggins side says to eat and sleep and hide from people. The Took side is yelling "I'M GOING ON AN ADVENTURE!!!!!" Source: photosbygy

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Product - FOX Fox News VNEWS @FoxNews .com Philadelphia Dunkin' Donuts robber spotted stretching beforehand fxn.ws/ 20JHTUV #FOXNewsUS 01-22-2017 06:52:55 (S)

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Font - average joe @jazz_inmypants one of my clearest memories of my grandfather is when he beat me in chess and i cried because i was a sore loser and he said ok i'll play you left-handed and then i won and it took me until like last week to realize he was a clown bastard

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Font - UNIVE your bff alex RUBI SANG @psybermonkey Nurse: you've been in a coma for three months Me: oh boy! I can't wait to see Coldplay in concert Nurse (standing 6 feet away): there's something you should know Me: what? Nurse: Coldplay sucks

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Coworker Learns To Not Mess With IT Guy's Cupcakes

Jerry was out there playing with fire. Some folks in this world seem to completely forget that you just never mess with the Sysadmins and IT wizards. Those tech savvy individuals pretty much carry the keys to the kingdom. It sounds like Jerry in particular was in dire need of a little wakeup call. The dude had the audacity to take a hard working teammate's cupcakes. But not just any teammate. Nope, we're talking about an IT wizard.