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2016/11/01

Neatorama

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Melting Homer - Mmmmm...Melty...

Posted: 01 Nov 2016 04:00 AM PDT


Melting Homer by Amorphia Apparel

No Homer isn't still wearing his Halloween costume, and no this isn't one of those episodes of Treehouse of Horror that airs after Halloween for some odd reason. This is what happens when Homer eats all the candy that has been sitting around the nuclear power plant for years, candy that has absorbed so much radiation each piece is basically like a mini nuke in your mouth. But you know how the head Simpson gets when he has a craving for candy, and even though he has plenty of sweets left at home he can't help himself when the craving hits him while he's at work!

The head of the Simpson clan will stop the world and melt with you when you wear this Melting Homer t-shirt by Amorphia Apparel, throw it on and watch your fellow fans grin with disgust delight!

Visit Amorphia Apparel's Facebook fan page, official website, Twitter and Tumblr, then head on over to his NeatoShop for more hilariously wrong designs:

Tesla Lightning (The History League)Don't Mess With Texas (Ohio??)Cheers (Science!)Mammoth Engine

View more designs by Amorphia Apparel | More Funny T-shirts | New T-Shirts

Are you a professional illustrator or T-shirt designer? Let's chat! Sell your designs on the NeatoShop and get featured in front of tons of potential new fans on Neatorama!

Pages from History: The Green Book

Posted: 01 Nov 2016 04:00 AM PDT

The following article is from the new bookUncle John’s Uncanny Bathroom Reader.

Here’s a piece of recent American history that most people have never heard of. It involves many of the elements we associate with modern life—cars, travel, eating, entrepreneurship…and discrimination. Here’s the story of the Green Book.

ROAD TRIP!

For as long as automobiles have been around, they have symbolized freedom and independence. They offered the promise of taking people anywhere they wanted to go, as long as there was a road that went there. For many Americans automobiles did indeed deliver on that promise. But for African Americans living in many parts of the United States in the early and mid-20th century, the automobile was little more than a symbol—that of a freedom that, for them, remained out of reach.

In those years, a trip by automobile for African Americans was an experience all its own, quite unlike car trips taken by white Americans. A black family preparing for a long trip had to pack enough food to get them all the way to where they were going, in case the restaurants along the route refused to serve them—a form of discrimination that was perfectly legal at the time. They had to pack pillows and blankets so that they could sleep in their car if the hotels they stopped at refused to provide them with lodging. They had to put extra cans of gas in the trunk—enough to get them through towns where none of the service stations would sell them gas. And they had to leave enough room in the trunk for a bucket that they could use as a toilet in places where restrooms were reserved for whites only.

KEEP ON MOVING

In some parts of the South, black motorists were advised to keep a chauffeur’s cap handy, so that if a white motorist took offense at their owning a car, perhaps because it was newer or nicer than their own, the motorist could put on the cap and pretend they were driving the car for a white owner. Even passing a slow-moving car on the road could lead to trouble: some white motorists took offense at the idea of dust kicked up by a black-owned car landing on their car. Simply stopping in a town long enough to find out blacks were unwelcome could be dangerous: thousands of towns all over the United States were “sundown towns,” which meant that blacks and other minorities had to be out of the area by sunset. African Americans caught in such a town after dark risked being harassed, arrested, beaten, or killed. In many places the sundown policy was unofficial, but in places like the town of Hawthorne, California, in the 1930s, signs were posted at the city limits with warnings like, “N*****, Don’t Let the Sun Set on YOU in Hawthorne.”

THE LIST

The problem was worst in the South, where segregation was mandated by Jim Crow laws. But as places like Hawthorne, California, make clear, it flourished in other parts of the country as well. New York City was no exception, and it was there in the mid-1930s that an African American mail carrier (and World War I veteran) named Victor Hugo Green decided to do something about it. Inspired by directories published by the Jewish community identifying so-called restricted businesses that did not serve Jews, Green decided to create a directory of businesses in the New York City metropolitan area that did not discriminate against blacks. He printed the information in a 15-page booklet called The Negro Motorist Green Book.

“This, our Premiere Issue,” Green wrote in the 1937 edition of the Green Book, “is dedicated to the Negro Motorist and we sincerely hope that you will find the many places of reference and information valuable and helpful.” The price of that first edition: 25¢.

If an African American reader of the Green Book needed some work done on their car, they knew that Gene’s Auto Repairs on West 155th Street would serve them, because the business was listed in the Green Book. Women who wanted a beauty treatment knew they would not be turned away by Bernice Bruton at the Ritz Beauty Salon on 7th Avenue. “Why Do So Many People Dine at Julia’s?” asked one paid advertisement. “Because She Has Excellent Food, Well Served at Most Reasonable Prices,” including daily dinners for 35¢, and Sunday dinners for 50¢. A couple eager for a night out could go to the Donhaven Country Club in Westchester County, which offered dinner dances with live music by Goldie Lucas and his Donhaven Country Club Band. The Green Book also provided listings for pharmacies, barbershops, cleaners, liquor stores, golf courses, and vacation spots, plus lists of state parks and points of interest, tips on safe driving and auto care, and any other information that Green thought would be useful to motorists.

HERE, THERE, EVERYWHERE

The 1937 edition proved so popular with readers that for the 1938 edition Green decided to expand the scope of the publication to include every state east of the Mississippi River. Then in 1939 he expanded it to the entire nation. For help with compiling the listings, he turned to his fellow mail carriers. They knew which businesses did and did not discriminate, which barbers gave the best haircuts, and which restaurants served the best food at reasonable prices. In communities where there were few or no hotels that provided accommodations to African Americans, the mail carriers submitted a new type of listing: “tourist homes,” or private homes whose owners rented rooms to travelers. Year by year, as more listings were sent in, the Green Book grew from 15 pages to more than 80, including entries for Canada, Mexico, and eventually even Bermuda, an island chain in the Atlantic popular with tourists. Later editions had the slogan “Carry Your Green Book With You—You May Need It” on the cover, along with a quote from Mark Twain: “Travel is Fatal to Prejudice.”



Over time, the number of copies sold grew, eventually reaching 15,000 copies a year. They could be ordered directly from Hugo Green or purchased through the businesses listed in the Green Book. They were also distributed through Esso service stations, which marketed the guides using the slogan “Go Further With Less Anxiety.” At a time when other service station chains, including Shell, refused to even sell gasoline to black motorists, Esso awarded service station franchises to blacks and had African American executives on its corporate staff. (Esso changed its name to Exxon in 1973.)

MUST-READ

Copies of the Green Book were essential reading not just for vacationers but also for African Americans who made their living on the road, including salesmen, musicians, and baseball players in the Negro Leagues. When the civil rights movement began in the mid-1950s, leaders of the movement began to use them as well. The guides probably saved many lives by steering motorists away from trouble and toward the businesses that would accommodate them.

Green also provided a “Vacation Reservation Service” to assist his readers with booking rooms and other services. He accomplished all of this while still delivering the mail during the day, and serving customers at the Green Book offices in the evenings from 8:00 p.m. to 10:00 p.m. It wasn’t until he retired from his job at the post office in 1952 (after 39 years) that he was able to focus entirely on the Green Book.

PLANNED OBSOLESCENCE

As successful as the Green Books were, Green told his readers that he actually looked forward to going out of business someday. “There will be a day sometime in the near future when this guide will not have to be published,” he wrote. “That is when we as a race will have equal  opportunities and privileges in the United States. It will be a great day for us to suspend this publication for then we can go wherever we please.” Green did not live quite long enough to see it: he passed away in 1960. But his widow, Alma, continued to publish the guides after his death, and she was the one who lived to see the passage of the Civil Rights Act of 1964, which made it illegal for businesses to discriminate against their customers on the basis of race.

With the passage of that law, for the first time in history African Americans had the freedom and the right to travel, buy gasoline, eat in restaurants, and obtain lodging anywhere they pleased. They no longer needed lists of businesses that were willing to serve them, now that all businesses were required by law to do so. Just as Hugo Green had predicted, the Green Book soon became obsolete, and ceased publication in 1966.

GREEN DAYS

For three decades, the Green Book had been an institution in the black community, as indispensable for the traveler as a road map, but they soon faded into obscurity. It had long been routine for subscribers to toss out last year’s Green Book as soon as the new year’s edition became available. When the Green Book itself became obsolete, many of the last copies were tossed out with the trash. Not surprisingly, few survive today. As interest in the publication has grown in recent years, the value of the surviving copies has risen substantially. The Smithsonian Institution’s National Museum of African American History and Culture has a copy of the 1941 Green Book in its collection. It originally sold for 25¢; the Smithsonian paid $22,500 for it in 2015.

Copies of the Green Book may still survive today in private homes, cultural and historical treasures hiding in plain sight, waiting to be discovered. If you happen to find one lying around, hang on to it—or better yet, donate it to a museum. It’s a living piece of American history, and a testament to one man’s three-decade mission to secure the blessings of liberty for everyone.

_______________________________

The article above is reprinted with permission from Uncle John's newest volume, Uncle John’s Uncanny Bathroom Reader. The 29th volume of the series is chock-full of fascinating stories, facts, and lists, and comes in both the Kindle version and paperback.

Since 1988, the Bathroom Reader Institute had published a series of popular books containing irresistible bits of trivia and obscure yet fascinating facts. If you like Neatorama, you'll love the Bathroom Reader Institute's books - go ahead and check 'em out!

Mind-blowing Halloween Costume

Posted: 01 Nov 2016 02:00 AM PDT

(Facebook link)

Matt MacMillan had a Halloween costume that you never saw coming. He's a cute girl wearing a pumpkin bag. Or is he? He was looking forward to greeting trick-or-treaters wearing this. I hope he had video running to catch their reactions. If that's not scary enough, look what's on their roof! -via Buzzfeed

The Best Fictional Beards, Ranked

Posted: 01 Nov 2016 12:00 AM PDT

For some guys a beard becomes part of their persona, but a fictional character's beard is put there as a hairy window into their made up soul.

We can tell if the character is good or evil just by looking at their facial hair, but identifying other beard types on the spectrum can be a bit tricky.

Luckily we have this arbitrarily ranked and absolutely infuriating chart created by the staff at Dorkly to reveal the truth about bearded characters, and give us something to argue about.

It has the God-Santa-Dumbledore ranking set right, but Jaspar Beardly's beard is far from middle of the road...and his name is BEARDLY!

I'd have put him square between Riker and Gimli, and then I would erase Seneca Crane because his beard is LAME!

See the full sized chart at Dorkly

This Halloween in Dance

Posted: 31 Oct 2016 10:00 PM PDT

(YouTube link)

You know what horror films are lacking in? Dancing! A nice dance number always makes a movie more memorable. Ellen Degeneres rectified that grievous omission for quite a few classic horror movies. Because you need a laugh after dealing with hundreds of trick-or-treaters. -via Tastefully Offensive

Clothing Options - Men Vs. Women

Posted: 31 Oct 2016 08:00 PM PDT

Guys who have never gone clothes shopping with a gal have no idea what women go through every time they buy new clothes.

We don't have to deal with the latest trends poking us in the eye or pants that cut off circulation to the lower half of our body (unless we want to be trendy, of course) and there's not a crop top in sight.

But if you're wondering why women often complain about shopping for clothes, or why the lady in your life keeps stealing all your clothes, this Sarah's Scribbles comic explains it all rather succinctly.

-Via Geeks Are Sexy

The Best Pieces from Japan’s Overwatch Fan Art Contest

Posted: 31 Oct 2016 06:00 PM PDT

Attention, Overwatch fans! Blizzard teamed up with the Japanese gamer magazine Famitsu teamed up for a Overwatch fan art contest. Finalists include digital art, cartoon art, humor, and even food. We don't know how many submissions there were, but the winners are awesome. See both of them plus a bunch of finalists at Unreality.

The Perfect Halloween Treat For People Who Hate Kids

Posted: 31 Oct 2016 04:00 PM PDT

(Image Link)

Halloween haters usually just turn off their porch lights, draw the shades and ignore anyone who comes to their door, but some have a more sinister plan- to trick kids into eating a nasty treat. 

You may have seen the caramel onion prank that made the rounds a few years ago, which was nasty but pretty easy to figure out before you take a bite.

But Mark Sparrow Tweeted about a much sneakier prank, so if you go to Mark's house do not eat any of his chocolate "bon bons" or you'll be sorry.

It's a good thing most parents will only let their little trick-or-treaters eat wrapped treats, or Mark's neighbors would probably form a posse!

-Via The Poke

5 British Witch Trials

Posted: 31 Oct 2016 02:00 PM PDT

Americans are very familiar with the Salem witch trials, but such witch hunts were going on in many places during that time. Illnesses that no one could explain were attributed to evil forces, and it was an easy leap to accuse one's enemies of causing the pain. Many people confessed, under torture, which reinforced belief in witches. An astonishing number of people died because of those beliefs before citizens eventually became sick of the carnage. England had its share of witch trials. One of the cases, in Pendle Hill, Lancashire, eventually led to accusations against a dozen people.

The trials began when a young woman named Alizon Device, from Pendle in Lancashire in northwest England, was accused of cursing a local shopkeeper who soon afterwards suffered a bout of ill health, now believed to have probably been a mild stroke. When news of this reached the authorities, an investigation was started that eventually led to the arrest and trial of several members of Alizon’s family (including her grandmother, Elizabeth Southerns, a notorious practitioner of witchcraft known locally as “Demdike”), as well as members of another local family, the Redfernes, with whom they had reportedly had a long-standing feud. Many of the families’ friends were also implicated in the trial, as were a number of supposed witches from nearby towns who were alleged to have attended a meeting at Elizabeth Southerns’s home on the night of Good Friday 1612.

By the end of the Pendle Hill witch trials, ten people were hanged for their "crimes." Not all of the cases in this list ended so badly for the victims, though. Read about five of England's witch trials at mental_floss.  

A Delicious No-Bake Spider Web Torte Perfect for Halloween

Posted: 31 Oct 2016 12:00 PM PDT

Looking for something that's both a little sweet and a little scary to eat tonight, but don't have much time to put it together either? Then look no further than this delightful no-bake torte that not only has a spider web pattern, but also reveals a bloody surprise when it's cut. Did I mention the main flavor components are Oreos, chocolate and caramel?

The Best Goblin King Costume This Year

Posted: 31 Oct 2016 10:00 AM PDT

The past few days, I've had to restrain myself from just posting everyone's cool Halloween costume, but this one takes the cake. So many people are dressing as the different incarnations David Bowie. Who knew that the best version of Jareth, his character in the movie Labyrinth, would be a dog? This Tweet is from a Bowie fan account, so it may be hard to track down who did the pup's hair and makeup. -via Buzzfeed

Update:The artist is named Maurene. This is her Pomeranian, and his name is Duff. -via Geeks Are Sexy

FREDDY CAN DANCE - You've Been Slashed By A Smooth Criminal

Posted: 31 Oct 2016 09:00 AM PDT


FREDDY CAN DANCE by ES427

Freddy are you okay, are you okay Freddy? The reason I ask is we're not used to seeing you dance around like a smooth criminal- we're used to seeing you slash people to ribbons in their nightmares like a bloodthirsty killer. So why the sudden urge to move like MJ? Because Freddy's trying to nail his audition for Dancing With The Stars, and he's gotta practice some time!

Show the world why Elm Street throws the best block parties with this FREDDY CAN DANCE t-shirt by ES427, it's sure to make your fellow Freddy Krueger fans squeal with delight!

Visit ES427's Facebook fan page, then head on over to his NeatoShop for more super bad designs:

Goodnight Bad Guy!DudeS for Saiyan

RISE OF THE BOUNTY HUNTERS

View more designs by ES427 | More Movie T-shirts | New T-Shirts

Are you a professional illustrator or T-shirt designer? Let's chat! Sell your designs on the NeatoShop and get featured in front of tons of potential new fans on Neatorama!

Gordon Ramsay Ranks The Five Worst Halloween Treats

Posted: 31 Oct 2016 09:00 AM PDT

Gordon Ramsay isn't afraid to voice his opinions on food, but have you ever heard him share his opinion on candy?

Me neither, which is why I found this clip of Gordon running through the five worst Halloween treats on Jimmy Kimmel Live so amusing.

Gordon is passionate about food, and as he breaks down the worst Halloween treats his hatred for people who give out circus peanuts, apples and pennies can be felt through the screen.

(YouTube Link)

-Via Uproxx

The Real Electric Frankenstein Experiments of the 1800s

Posted: 31 Oct 2016 08:00 AM PDT

Mary Shelley conjured up images of a reanimated corpse in her novel Frankenstein, published in 1818. While the novel was light on the technical aspects, it explored the ethics of a "successful" reanimation experiment. She was not the first to consider the possibility. Scientists and pseudoscientists were experimenting with electricity and its effect on flesh for decades already. After it became known that electricity could make the muscles of dead animals, the effect was even used for entertainment.

People outside of science were also fascinated by electricity. They would attend shows where bull heads and pigs were electrified, and watch public dissections at research institutions such as the Company of Surgeons in England, which later became the Royal College of Surgeons.

When scientists tired of testing animals, they turned to corpses, particularly corpses of murderers. In 1751, England passed the Murder Act, which allowed the bodies of executed murderers to be used for experimentation. “The reasons the Murder Act came about were twofold: there weren’t enough bodies for anatomists, and it was seen as a further punishment for the murderer,” says Burba. “It was considered additional punishment to have your body dissected.”

Atlas Obscura tells the tale of a particularly gruesome 1818 experiment in which Scottish chemist Andrew Ure attempted to bring an executed convict's body back to life. Maybe he should have read Shelley's novel first.  

The Best Horror Movie Every Year Since 1960's Psycho

Posted: 31 Oct 2016 07:00 AM PDT

Sure there were horror movies pre-1960, but most horror fans know the best ones came after that groovy decade. If you're still looking for a perfect film to watch for Halloween, or if you're just looking to enjoy a trip through horror movie history, you won't want to miss this list of the best horror flicks every year since Pyscho came out. It also is a great source of debate ass I'm sure plenty of people won't agree with their assessments.

Big Cat Rescue Halloween

Posted: 31 Oct 2016 06:00 AM PDT

The lions, tigers, and panthers of Big Cat Rescue always get pumpkins to play with for Halloween, but this year, they also get their own haunted houses!

(YouTube link)

To the cats, they are just balls and boxes, which is just what a cat wants to play with! -via Tastefully Offensive

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