Neatorama

Octopus Typewriter
Car on Russian Racetrack Splits in Half, Laughter Ensues
For Sale: One Haunted Mental Asylum
Cats and Cucumbers: A Compilation
Incredibly Cool Cosplay From BlizzCon 2015
Microsoft's Facial Emotion Reading Software Is Fun and Funny
I Made A Mistake I Bought A Jeep
Arkansas Man Shoots Massive Rattlesnake
The Long, Long History of Pyramid Conspiracy Theories
Viva Big Boss - Years Of Battle Have Given Him A Big Head
BMX Tricks inside a Kaleidoscope
Thoughtful Husband Takes Selfie Just as His Wife Gives Birth
24 Facts about Wine
Unbelievable Urban Legends That Happen To Be True
Baby Monitor Catches Toddler Singing Star Wars Music
History of Home Alone Reveals the Director Took the Job So He Wouldn't Have to Work With Chevy Chase
The Story of a World War II Veteran
Chinese Man With Terminal Cancer Marries His Sex Doll
British Military Portraits 1915 and 2015
Fifteen Fun Facts About Time Bandits
Reading Time - Something Stinks, Snarf! Snarf!
Where You’ve Been
Bill Nye Is Photoshopped Into The Ultimate Science Badass
Veterans Talk About Killing in War
Beautiful Portraits of Senior Shelter Dogs Who Have a Lot of Love Left to Give

Posted: 12 Nov 2015 04:00 AM PST

Look at that thing! It's just beautiful.

You know, back in the old days, everyone had to work on one of these beauties. They'd make the most beautiful clacking and slithering sounds. And the sensation of a tentacle sucker popping on your skin . . . well, they don't make typewriters like this 1938 Underwood anymore. And we lost something wonderful when they did.

Courtney Brown, an artist in Oakland, calls her sculpture "Self Organization." It's on display at the San Luis Obispo Museum of Art until November 15. You can see more photos at Colossal.

Car on Russian Racetrack Splits in Half, Laughter Ensues

Posted: 12 Nov 2015 03:00 AM PST

YouTube Link

In this odd Russian video by YouTube user Alexey Kuvaev, which was later posted to reddit, the unexpected happens to a slow-moving car on a Russian racetrack. Onlookers watch as the car splits cleanly in half, with each half spinning somewhat out of control. The Russian audience seems to get a big kick out of the event. As one YouTube commenter quipped, "In Russia you have to be ready for anything." Via Laughing Squid

For Sale: One Haunted Mental Asylum

Posted: 12 Nov 2015 02:00 AM PST

The Eloise complex in Westland, Michigan, near Detroit, was established in 1839 as a poorhouse. In its heyday, Eloise Hospital was a psychiatric institution covering 902 acres with 70 buildings. It has its own police and fire department for 12,000 patients, and even its own zip code! The complex underwent several incarnations, and now is down to eight buildings on 50 acres. Still a big chunk of real estate, and it can be yours for $1.5 million. The broker says no one believes it’s haunted, but others tell a different tale.

A yet-to-be released horror movie was shot in 2014 at the site, attempting to capitalize on the Eloise folklore, which the website Haunted USA says can be attributed to the fact explorers “were rumored to have discovered jars of human body parts … and creepy snapshots of patients in the abandoned buildings that were torn down in the 1980s.”

It perhaps shouldn’t surprise, then, that “some have reported hearing strange moans, screams, and roars on the old grounds”, the website says. YouTube clips abound of fright-seekers at the premises.

And while Deighan may be confident that no one actually believes in the haunted tales, that isn’t entirely the case: a building employee who declined to give their name, as they weren’t authorized to speak with the media, says an occasional interaction with the paranormal isn’t unheard of.

“I’m serious,” the employee says with a hearty laugh, recalling an incident where a couple of children trotted up the nearby staircase only to turn around and report that a “guy was sitting on the steps”.

Read more about the Eloise complex at The Guardian. -via Digg

(Image credit: Dwight Burdette)

Cats and Cucumbers: A Compilation

Posted: 12 Nov 2015 01:00 AM PST

YouTube Link

In this video compilation, cats bravely face the devil's vegetable: cucumbers. They're green, crunchy and evil, and they've invaded feline space. What's to be done? These cats show us just how to handle such a volatile and dangerous situation. Via Tastefully Offensive

Incredibly Cool Cosplay From BlizzCon 2015

Posted: 12 Nov 2015 12:00 AM PST

BlizzCon is the celebration of all things Blizzard, a convention dedicated to the impact Blizzard Entertainment has had on the gaming industry, especially with their MMORPG World Of Warcraft.

Each year a horde of hardcore Blizzfans descend upon a convention center in Anaheim and chill with their fellow fans IRL while they're AFK, and as you'd expect many of the attendees like to cosplay at the event.

Cosplayers craft their BlizzCon costumes with extra care, knowing they'll be hearing about their costumes from both Guildies and their rivals online until they up the ante, or redeem themselves, at next year's BlizzCon.

(all images via John Jiao Photography)

Microsoft's Facial Emotion Reading Software Is Fun and Funny

Posted: 11 Nov 2015 11:00 PM PST

Project Oxford is a fascinating and very entertaining application developed by Microsoft. You can load photos of people in it and the program will read the emotions displayed on the faces. There are eight emotions and the results give their relative weights.

You can upload your friends, family, celebrities, or favorite TV and movie characters.

Here's how it reads Miss Cellania's face:

The program is quite versatile. It's capable of reading non-photographic faces. Oddly, though, when I uploaded Sallman's famous painting Head of Christ, it said there was no face present.

You can find more funny applications of this program at The Mary Sue and The Next Web, including Luke Skywalker, Kim Kardashian, Adolf Hitler, and the Doctor.

I Made A Mistake I Bought A Jeep

Posted: 11 Nov 2015 10:00 PM PST

Teg Sethi bought a new Jeep Grand Cherokee for $60,000AU in 2013 and it was trouble from the get-go. But he couldn’t get satisfaction from the dealer or from Chrysler. So he did the only thing that a mere customer can do -took it to the internet with a song.

(YouTube link)

The song is a definite earworm. It reminds me of United Breaks Guitars, which got a response from the airline as soon as the video went viral. -via reddit

Arkansas Man Shoots Massive Rattlesnake

Posted: 11 Nov 2015 09:00 PM PST

When a huge rattlesnake bit a dog owned by a Hartford, Arkansas man, he sprang into action. Outfitted in shorts and flip-flops, the man borrowed a pink, snub-nosed revolver from his wife and shot the western diamondback rattler, killing it.

When a friend of the family posted pictures of the snake on Facebook, the photos made the rounds quickly. Thus far, the post has over 500 shares. Experts say that while this isn't the largest of this species ever caught, it definitely is in the "unusually huge" category. Estimates of its size range from eight to nine feet. The most common length for the species is approximately 4 feet.

See additional pictures, read more on this story and watch a video news report about the snake here.

The Long, Long History of Pyramid Conspiracy Theories

Posted: 11 Nov 2015 08:00 PM PST

The pyramids of Egypt have inspired all kinds of tales, from the mummy’s curse to the exploits of the archeologists who explored them. People love to speculate about the enormous edifices because they are so old. And since the first European wrote about them, people come up with ideas they just “know” about them. Were they built as grain silos, the ones Joseph told Pharaoh to build in the book of Genesis? Were they built by aliens? Or were they part of ancient Atlantis? The answers seem so obvious to those who believe them. Maggie Koerth-Baker talked to professor Ethan Watrall, who studies both Egyptology and pseudoarchaeology.

You only have to turn on the History Channel to see how this thread stretches into our own time period—despite the fact that the actual ancient Egyptians flat-out told us both why and how the pyramids were built.

“They were prolific bureaucrats. Building it was a massive state undertaking, a public works project,” Watrall says. “The logistics and ideology are clearly documented in thousands and thousands of texts.”

So why would anyone believe in Atlanteans or think the Egyptians stored grain in pyramids? We are, after all, talking about one of the most self-documented ancient civilizations in the world. Why not listen to what they say about themselves?

There are two basic reasons, Watrall explains. Read how those reasons led so many people to declare themselves enlightened about the Pyramids at Atlas Obscura.

Viva Big Boss - Years Of Battle Have Given Him A Big Head

Posted: 11 Nov 2015 07:00 PM PST

Viva Big Boss by Mdk7

The Big Boss is quite a striking figure, with an eyepatch that seems to see right through you and a scar laden scowl that makes even a heart made out of metal melt into a pool of jelly. Solid Snake's battles against the Big Boss are legendary, and it seems like no amount of gear is enough to help a hero defeat this larger-than-life military mind. But why are people wearing his face on t-shirts like some kind of revolutionary hero? Because he changed the way we play the game.

Get geared up for game night with this Viva Big Boss t-shirt by Mdk7, it's short on smiles but big on bad attitude!

Visit Mdk7's Twitter, then head on over to his NeatoShop for more gamer-iffic designs:


Jurassic Bingo!	Vault Boss	Sons Of Jurassic	CALL

View more designs by Mdk7 | More Video Game T-shirts | New T-Shirts

Are you a professional illustrator or T-shirt designer? Let's chat! Sell your designs on the NeatoShop and get featured in front of tons of potential new fans on Neatorama!

BMX Tricks inside a Kaleidoscope

Posted: 11 Nov 2015 07:00 PM PST

(Video Link)

In this trippy video from Red Bull, BMX champion Kriss Kyle rides his bike through a shimmering array of fractal shapes and vibrant colors. It's like he's inside a kaleidoscope. As the tube twists, Kyle jumps over obstacles, performs sudden turns, and bounces off seemingly invisible planes.

-via Laughing Squid

Thoughtful Husband Takes Selfie Just as His Wife Gives Birth

Posted: 11 Nov 2015 06:00 PM PST

It's called a "birthie." And you should take one!

That's what Gil Solano did. His wife was experiencing a radical new type of pain that he never, ever would. This was obviously the ideal time to take a picture of himself and, of course, his beloved wife in the background. He explained on reddit:

My wife wanted to make sure that someone took a picture of the expression on our faces when our daughter was born today. So I took one.

Well, then, mission accomplished.

Mrs. Solano gave birth to a healthy 7 pound, 6 ounce girl that the couple has named Eva Nell. Gil swears that his wife finds the photo funny.

-via Dave Barry

24 Facts about Wine

Posted: 11 Nov 2015 05:00 PM PST

(YouTube link)

How much do you know about wine? You’re about to know a little more! Wine has an ancient history and is intertwined with many cultures. The mental_floss List Show has trivia about many different wines, from champagne to Two-Buck Chuck.

Unbelievable Urban Legends That Happen To Be True

Posted: 11 Nov 2015 04:00 PM PST

Most urban legends begin with a true story, and as the story is then modified, reinterpreted and exaggerated the fantastic fictionalized "truth" starts to overshadow the dark truth at the heart of the tale.

The tale of a killer hiding out in the attic of a house for weeks before murdering the inhabitants sounds like a work of horror fiction, but this incident actually occurred on the Hinterkaifeck farm in Germany back in 1922.

While the tale of a murderer hiding out for weeks may sound far fetched the mere idea of someone dying as a result of receiving an atomic wedgie seems like pure schoolyard fantasy.

But once again the tale is true, only the poor boy was a 58-year-old man who received an atomic wedgie from his drunk stepson, and he was choked to death by the underwear's elastic waistband.

Read 9 Unbelievable Urban Legends (That Happen To Be True) at Cracked (Contains NSFW language)

Baby Monitor Catches Toddler Singing Star Wars Music

Posted: 11 Nov 2015 03:00 PM PST

(Video Link)

Jonathan H. Liu recently watched Star Wars with his kids. His toddler, who is 2 and a half, really enjoyed it--especially the Imperial March, which is also known as the Darth Vader theme. After she went to bed for a nap, the cutest little Sith began singing that piece of music.

Here she is with a captured piece of Rebel equipment. At Geek Dad, Liu explains that his daughter is fascinated with Darth Vader:

When he first appeared on the screen, she started mimicking the sound of his breathing. When the Imperial March started playing, she stood up and danced! Lately she keeps asking us to sing the “Star Wars song”–sometimes she means the theme song, but quite often what she really wants to hear is Darth Vader’s theme instead.

She has chosen her path wisely.

-via Huffington Post

History of Home Alone Reveals the Director Took the Job So He Wouldn't Have to Work With Chevy Chase

Posted: 11 Nov 2015 02:00 PM PST

Home Alone | Image: Twentieth Century Fox

The linked article is an extensive and informative oral history of Home Alone, written for Chicago magazine by James Hughes, son of 80s movie maestro John Hughes. This 25th anniversary endeavor includes interviews with those involved with the project including Raja Gosnell, the film's editor, Joe Roth, chairman of Twentieth Century Fox at the time of filming, cast members Daniel Stern and Catherine O'Hara and director Chris Columbus.

Chris Columbus reveals that the only reason he ended up working on the project was to get away from another in which he was supposed to work with notorious jerk Chevy Chase. Columbus writes,

"In 1989, I directed Heartbreak Hotel, and it was a disaster. It opened on a Friday, and by Wednesday it was only playing at two o’clock in the afternoon. Around that time, John Hughes sent me the script for Christmas Vacation. I love Christmas, so to do a Christmas comedy had been a dream.

I went out to dinner with Chevy Chase [the movie’s star]. To be completely honest, Chevy treated me like dirt. But I stuck it out and even went as far as to shoot second unit [collecting establishing shots and special sequences, usually without principal actors]. Some of my shots of downtown Chicago are still in the movie.

Then I had another meeting with Chevy, and it was worse. I called John [who was producing the film] and said, 'There’s no way I can do this movie. I know I need to work, but I can’t do it with this guy.' John was very understanding. About two weeks later, I got two scripts at my in-laws’ house in River Forest. One was Home Alone, with a note from John asking if I wanted to direct. I thought, Wow, this guy is really supporting me when no one else in Hollywood was going to. John was my savior."

Read the entire oral history of Home Alone at Chicago magazine. Via Vulture

The Story of a World War II Veteran

Posted: 11 Nov 2015 01:00 PM PST

Thomas E. Anderson was shipped off to Europe in 1943 to battle the Axis powers. His account of the war experience takes a sudden left turn in the middle of this animated version.

(YouTube link)

Life is a bit of a crap shoot. You don’t really know what’s gonna happen, until it happens. And then there’s not much you can do about it.

Anderson’s story was illustrated by Kriti Kaur for Huffington Post for Veteran's Day. -via Digg

Chinese Man With Terminal Cancer Marries His Sex Doll

Posted: 11 Nov 2015 12:00 PM PST

Ever since companies like Real Doll started making "companionship" dolls that actually look lifelike people (mostly men) have been doing some mighty strange things with them, and not necessarily in a naughty way.

Some men see their realistic "companionship" dolls as a surrogate life partner, a female figure that makes them feel less lonely, and these guys have given up on the dating game in favor of life with lifelike replica.

These dolls are big with unmarried men in China, where one guy recently did the strangest and yet somehow sanest thing with his doll- he married (her?) it.

The unidentified 28-year-old man was reportedly diagnosed with terminal cancer and didn't want to leave a living widow behind, so he married his doll in a ceremony complete with dress changes and posed wedding photos.

Some are theorizing it's nothing but a marketing campaign, and yet the story doesn't seem any more far fetched than what you read about guys and their dolls online nowadays, so why fake it when someone's bound to be in to the idea?

-Via Daily Mail

British Military Portraits 1915 and 2015

Posted: 11 Nov 2015 11:00 AM PST

During World War I, photographer Benjamin Reeves took portraits of British military personnel as they prepared to go to battle. A hundred years later, his grandson Tom Reeves used the exact same camera (which uses glass plates) to take pictures of British military personnel as well. He even used the same painted backdrop and props! The new series of photographs was taken for the British Legion for their Poppy Appeal fundraising drive. See more of the 1915 and 2015 portraits paired at Buzzfeed.

Tom Reeves is actually the fourth generation photographer in the family. The family studio is named Edward Reeves Photography, established by Tom’s great-grandfather in 1858.

Fifteen Fun Facts About Time Bandits

Posted: 11 Nov 2015 10:00 AM PST

Michael Palin and Terry Gilliam's masterpiece Time Bandits is one of those movies I loved as a kid even though I didn't totally get the film, and just like the kids who attended the test screening I liked one part the most- "the parents being blown up!".

Nearly three and a half decades later I've seen Time Bandits dozens of times and still find something to love with every new viewing, and I appreciate the amazing performances now more than ever.

(YouTube Link)

The Time Bandits themselves are played by little people with huge personalities, so it's easy to see how their roles could be inspired by their real life attitudes.

But Ralph Richardson's personality changed a bit as he played The Supreme Being, a role he took so seriously that he submitted his own red ink edits complete with message "God wouldn't say that".

(YouTube Link)

There were more than enough talented actors cast in Time Bandits, but none proved more important to the final look of the film than Sean Connery.

He helped guide Gilliam's directing on the first day of shooting, and he came up with that fun bit at the end where he plays the firefighter. Is there anything Sean Connery can't do?

Read 15 Fun Facts About "Time Bandits" at mental_floss

Reading Time - Something Stinks, Snarf! Snarf!

Posted: 11 Nov 2015 09:00 AM PST

Reading Time by Ed Harrington

Lion-O is always the first to charge into battle, the last guy to leave a compatriot's side in combat, and the only guy the other ThunderCats trust to lead them. But sometimes he needs a little quiet time to reflect and do some light reading while dropping some stinky kids off at the sandbox.

Show the world what happens when Lion-O isn't wielding the Sword Of Omens with this Reading Time t-shirt by Ed Harrington, it's so funny even Mumm-Ra can't help but crack up!

Visit Ed Harrington's official website, Instagram and Tumblr, then head on over to his NeatoShop for more delightfully geeky designs:


Bedrock	Her-Man	I Have The Power (puff)	Hey You Guys!

View more designs by Ed Harrington | More Funny T-shirts | New T-Shirts

Are you a professional illustrator or T-shirt designer? Let's chat! Sell your designs on the NeatoShop and get featured in front of tons of potential new fans on Neatorama!

Where You’ve Been

Posted: 11 Nov 2015 09:00 AM PST

Well, this is kind of fun. The Visited States Map Generator is an application to record what states you’ve been to, color-coded to indicate how much time you’ve spent there. Canada is included, but I’ve never been there. The color coding is an indication of how familiar you are with each state.

Red means I've just passed through, maybe seen a thing or two.

Amber means I've at least slept there and seen a few things. I have a first-hand idea of what the state is like.

Blue means I've spent a good amount of time in that state.

Green means I've spent a lot of time in that state, weeks at at time on multiple visits—or lived there.

You can also use the map to generate a particular trip, places you’d like to go, or just make a map with pretty colors. The map pictured shows you where I’ve been, at least in the U.S. I reserved green only for places I've lived. Flyovers don’t count, in my opinion, but you do your map however you want. -via Fred Bradbury

Bill Nye Is Photoshopped Into The Ultimate Science Badass

Posted: 11 Nov 2015 08:00 AM PST

Bill Nye is undoubtedly the science guy, and he'll forever be known for his scientifically stupendous TV show that introduced many young minds to the might of science, but he's not really known for being a badass.

I mean that in the very best way possible, of course, because he's a man of science and truly has no need to go around blowing up cars or punching people into submission like a stereotypical badass.

But Redditor Chipper_chap wanted to see how badass Bill Nye could become with a little help from Photoshop, so he started a PsBattle by posting the pic above entitled "Perplexed Bill Nye".

Soon that hard bitten science man was walking down all kinds of dark roads, setting science aside long enough to star in far bloodier TV shows and record a gangsta rap album.

See more of Bill Nye Photoshopped guy here

http://icanhas.cheezburger.com/share/75700481

Veterans Talk About Killing in War

Posted: 11 Nov 2015 07:00 AM PST

Cut Video talked to several veterans: Lonnie, Lance, Josh, Dan, Jonathan, and Qassim, about their wartime experiences, especially what it’s like to kill someone. Their stories are heartbreaking.

(YouTube link)

There are extended videos featuring more from Josh and Lonnie. Take some time today to thanks a veteran for their service. Many of them are still suffering for it, decades later. This video contains NSFW language. -via Buzzfeed

Beautiful Portraits of Senior Shelter Dogs Who Have a Lot of Love Left to Give

Posted: 11 Nov 2015 06:00 AM PST

Emily

When her landlord wouldn't allow her to adopt a pitbull terrier, photographer Stacey Gammon channeled her desire for animal companionship by volunteering at an animal shelter. Realizing that her photography talent could be put to good use there, Gammon began shooting portraits of the animals in an effort to get them permanent homes.

Through her involvement with the shelter, Gammon became aware of the Mr. Mo Project, a New York nonprofit that rescues old shelter dogs in poor health who are on paths to being euthanized. The Mr. Mo project helps secure medical care for the ailing animals and tries to get them placed in caring, permanent homes. Gammon was so touched and impressed with the facility that she began shooting gratis animal portraits for them as well. She said,