2023/04/28

Peter Has His Employees Evaluate Him

The Weekly Bird

PETER HAS HIS EMPLOYEES EVALUATE HIM

Eggs

When Peter announced this idea at our weekly meeting, Jack made an audible gasp.

Sciurus carolinensis

Spencer put his critiques in a compliment sandwich.

First he told Peter he had amazing cheekbones, then mentioned this was the most toxic work environment he's ever been in, then he said Peter had really tight buns.

The next thing that's gonna be Red Hot is your ass after I give you a spanking! Now spit it out!

John said that Peter really pushes everyone to become better.

Like that one time when Peter literally pushed Jack into traffic because he found out we were over budget.

It's the thought that counts right?

Sam told Peter he was feeling overworked and should maybe try to incorporate some structured naptime.

Peter responded by knocking Sam unconscious so he could rest on the floor for a little bit.

I think this one is a blue jay.

Hoff was really nervous about evaluating Peter.

He recalled what Mr. Terry told him about eye contact after he walked in on his step-dad giving it to his mom, "Never look an alpha straight in the eyes."

It's the thought that counts right?

YUP, WE ALL LOVE WORKING HERE

Please, for the love of God, can anyone out there call OSHA?!

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