The Morning: Resolving New Year’s resolutions

If your resolution seems designed by someone who doesn't like you, you can still reconsider it.

View in browser|nytimes.com Continue reading the main story January 6, 2024 By Melissa Kirsch Good morning. What does it take to finally make a New Year's resolution stick? María Jesús Contreras Unresolved issues How far into the New Year do you progress before you stop greeting people with "Happy New Year"? Is it two weeks? The end of January? Valentine's Day? I like the practice. We're all here together, at the threshold of the year that will be. It's like we're all co-owners of this new house called 2024, and we're saying "Welcome!" to one another. How will we furnish it in the months ahead? Some of us are a week into our New Year's resolutions, perhaps already congratulating ourselves for sticking to whatever it is we resolved. I'm of two minds about resolutions. I like the idea of declaring an intention to make a change. I deplore the idea of setting myself up to fail. My policy on New Year's resolutions is that they shouldn't be too punishing and they shouldn't be too grand. We often use a resolution as a cudgel, as a method to get ourselves back in line, a means of eradicating the parts of ourselves we don't like. David Sedaris has written about how, every New Year's Eve, he had watched his mother scribbling furiously on a bunch of index cards. After her death, he discovered that she'd written the same thing on each one: "Be good." That's a good encapsulation of all resolutions, isn't it? Be good. Resolutions tend to be freighted with the implication that the way you are now is not good, or at least not good enough. My resolutions are typically of this variety: self-criticism disguised as self-improvement. Get in shape; stop your profligate spending; be nicer; work harder. If your resolution seems architected by someone who doesn't like you, there's still time to reconsider it. My resolution this year is to, whenever possible, shop in person instead of online. I like this resolution because it lines up with other objectives I have concerning my finances, community, sustainability, simplicity. And it's not totally about me, so it feels a little less dreary and narcissistic than typical resolution fare. It's also less ambitious, which I hope means that I'm less likely to abandon it. A friend recently reminded me that anything worth doing is worth doing poorly. I've built in the "whenever possible" clause with this in mind. I'm going to do my best to buy things in brick-and-mortar shops (or, as Sedaris edited his mother's resolution to read: "Try to think about maybe being good.") But when I, inevitably, waver and, say, overnight a bucket of Tide Pods in a moment of desperation, I hope to be able to offer myself some grace. For more I talked a little more about resolutions for a story on The Times's audio app. If now is not the right time for resolutions, remember you don't need a holiday to change your life. "Finding time for anything that matters will always be a challenge." The nicest resolution Margaret Renkl says she has ever made is an alluring one. "Wouldn't you just rather commit yourself to a small change every day?" The band boygenius reflects on New Year's resolutions. Continue reading the main story ADVERTISEMENT THE WEEK IN CULTURE Jodie Foster and Kali Reis star in the upcoming season of "True Detective." Michele K. Short/HBO Jodie Foster will star in Season 4 of HBO's "True Detective," which premieres next Sunday. It has a new showrunner — and presents a decidedly more female perspective. Taylor Swift has now spent 68 weeks atop the Billboard 200 album chart, surpassing Elvis Presley's record for the most weeks at No. 1 as a solo artist. Jelly Roll, the face-tattooed country singer who's become known as much for emotional openness as for hit songs, talked about the Grammys and his rap past. 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Joseph Lelyveld started at The Times as a copy boy and rose to become its executive editor, overseeing an era of growth and ushering in the digital age. He died at 86. THE LATEST NEWS President Biden spoke in Blue Bell, Pa., yesterday. Pete Marovich for The New York Times "Whether democracy is still America's sacred cause is the most urgent question of our time," President Biden said in a speech marking the third anniversary of the Jan. 6 Capitol attack, harshly criticizing Donald Trump. The Supreme Court will rule on whether Trump is eligible to appear on Colorado's primary ballot. The case will be argued in early February, and the court is likely to decide it quickly. The Supreme Court also temporarily revived Idaho's near-total ban on abortions and agreed to review a Biden administration challenge to the law. Alaska Airlines grounded its Boeing 737 Max 9 fleet for inspections after a midair problem that passengers said opened a hole in a plane's fuselage. 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By Melissa Clark Brothy Thai curry with tofu and herbs January, the icy heart of soup season, is an ideal time to dive deep. Now is exactly the moment to explore soup in all its iterations, from the thick and stewlike to the effervescent and light. And on the lighter side, don't miss Yewande Komolafe's spicy, brothy Thai curry with silken tofu and herbs. A fragrant mix of jarred red curry paste enriched with coconut milk and clouds of tofu, it comes together quickly, and it's easily adaptable. The notes reveal cooks adding more vegetables (bok choy, spinach, mushrooms); substituting green curry paste; even bulking things up with noodles, rice or ground pork. Simmer a potful this weekend, and don't be shy about making it your own. REAL ESTATE Dizzy Gillespie in 1955. Carl Van Vechten Collection/Getty Images Jazz incubator: The tree-lined streets of Queens gave pioneering Black musicians a home. Renovating a kitchen? Don't forget the most crucial thing: light. 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ADVICE FROM WIRECUTTER Find the right dishwasher detergent If your dishwasher detergent is an afterthought, consider this: Upgrading it is a simple step that can help even not-so-great dishwashers deliver spotless dishes. You may need to try a few different detergents to find the best one for your dishwasher, but we recommend starting with our top pick. Wirecutter tested 24 different kinds of detergent on dishes smeared with everything from baked-on egg to burned-on casserole to day-old oatmeal, and our pick cleared every stubborn stain that came its way, no pre-rinsing required. — Andrea Barnes GAME OF THE WEEKEND Michael Penix Jr. Chris Graythen/Getty Images Washington vs. Michigan, college football championship: Washington quarterback Michael Penix Jr. appeared unstoppable in his semifinal win over Texas, throwing into impossibly small openings and hitting receivers in stride deep down the field. In Michigan's semifinal, its defensive front seemed to break through Alabama's offensive line with ease, notching 10 tackles for losses, including six sacks. Michigan hasn't faced a quarterback as good as Penix; Washington hasn't faced a defense as good as Michigan's. Monday at 7:30 p.m. Eastern on ESPN For more Coaches who faced each team this season shared their thoughts on how Washington and Michigan match up. NOW TIME TO PLAY Here is today's Spelling Bee. Yesterday's pangram was likelihood. Take the news quiz to see how well you followed this week's headlines. And here are today's Mini Crossword, Wordle, Sudoku and Connections. Thanks for spending part of your weekend with The Times. — Melissa P.S. María Jesús Contreras, the artist who creates the illustrations atop this newsletter every Saturday, has made a video highlighting her work for The Morning over the past year. It's a delight. Sign up here to get this newsletter in your inbox. Reach our team at themorning@nytimes.com. Continue reading the main story Editor: David Leonhardt News Editor: Tom Wright-Piersanti News Staff: Desiree Ibekwe, Lauren Jackson, Sean Kawasaki-Culligan, Brent Lewis, German Lopez, Ian Prasad Philbrick, Ashley Wu News Assistant: Lyna Bentahar Saturday Writer: Melissa Kirsch Need help? Review our newsletter help page or contact us for assistance. You received this email because you signed up for the Morning newsletter from The New York Times, or as part of your New York Times account. To stop receiving The Morning, unsubscribe. To opt out of other promotional emails from The Times, including those regarding The Athletic, manage your email settings. To opt out of updates and offers sent from The Athletic, submit a request. Subscribe to The TimesGet The New York Times app Connect with us on: Change Your EmailPrivacy PolicyContact UsCalifornia Notices The New York Times Company. 620 Eighth Avenue New York, NY 10018