The best Overheard in New York quotes from last week, by your votes:
Because a Simple "Fuck Off" Just Isn't Very Classy
(very pretty girl waiting for the cross light to change)
Crazy old man: Yum, you sure are pretty.
(no response)
Crazy old man (excited now): Yummy! I like them pretty ones.
(pretty girl hisses at him and walks away)
Tourist dad to little girl: See, darling? That's how you handle those situations.
--Broadway & Houston
None of My Relationships Are Any of Your Business
Man reciting gospel on a train: And you, sir, have you accepted Jesus into your life?
Passenger: A long time ago, baby. Now fuck off.
--1 Train
Everyone's Had at Least One Crazy Wednesday One-Liner
College girl to her boyfriend: Yeah, but you always make sexual advances on my roommates.
--Lincoln Center
Serious student: Yeah, well, I really don't want to talk about my roommate's penis anymore.
--LaGuardia & Washington Square South
Chick to friend: It's not about the toilet paper, his roommate only used baby wipes.
--Spring St & Mott St
Overheard by: Nick Caylor
NYU kid on cell: I'm still hoping to live in housing next year unless my roommates find out that I got arrested.
--Mercer & Waverly
Young suit into cell: You pissed on my toothbrush!? What the fuck? Fine, I'll get you a new pouffe... Fuck you! Pink or purple? Just get me a new toothbrush! You know what kind! Always, right? The blue ones or the yellow ones? Well, did you get your period or no? Okay... Okay... fine... fine... fine! Look, I'll be home around seven, okay? (yelling) I don't care who you're fucking, it's your turn to cook! Right, fine, talk later, okay? (hangs up, to very attractive female companion) She's really just my roommate...
--82nd & Lexington
Like That It's Possible to Get Thin by Eating Chocolate?
Guy giving out Kellogg's Special K chocolate bars: Free cereal bars! Free cereal bars!
Hobo (to Kellogg's guy): Hey, why isn't anyone giving me any money? They all be paying attention to you!
Kellogg's guy: Because I'm giving out free candy. You're giving out lies.
--Outside Penn Station
Then Everybody Launched Into the "Kit-Kat" Song
(woman walks into packed theater looking for boyfriend)
Woman, yelling: Jim*? Jim, where are you?
Random guy in the audience #1: Here!
Random guy #2: Over here!
Random guy #3: Here!
(entire theater starts shouting "here!")
Woman: C'mon, gimme a break.
--Imax Theater
Overheard by: Goober
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Keep a civil tongue.