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Thrillist Los Angeles
Monday April 27, 2009
Ron Jeremy's Guide To The Valley
On the eve of the DVD release of his R-rated (yet
nudity-strewn) horror comedy "One Eyed Monster", we asked
adult film layabout Ron Jeremy where you should hit if you
find yourself in the netherworld he's plied his trade in for
decades:
Best Pizza: D'Amores
12910 Magnolia Blvd, Van Nuys; 818.505.1111
"Tiny place, big service and amazing zah", says Ron of this
thin-crust shop, which ships water in from Massachusetts to
achieve its unique flavor, which frankly, is just pizzare.
The menus are at http://themove.thrillist.com/link.php?M=2181171&N=56173&C=25f0fb7663659a52572fbc99fe5fd818&L=38143
Best Ethnic Food: Brent's Delicatessen
19565 Parthenia St, Northridge; 818.886.5979
This longtime standby's known for Jewish favorites like
whitefish salad and matzo ball soup, though Ron's got his
own favorite: "I know a little something about hot tongue,
and they serve it up". (Catch Ron at the Comedy Store every
other never.)
Stuff your face at http://themove.thrillist.com/link.php?M=2181171&N=56173&C=25f0fb7663659a52572fbc99fe5fd818&L=38144
Best Nice Meal: Miceli's
3655 Cahuenga Blvd West, Universal City; 323.851.3344
"It's got amazingly phenomenal Italian food and the waiters
sing; they hire waiters who are actually really good
singers", killing your longtime dream of having Scott Stapp
bring you some Veal Scallopini.
Sing for your supper at http://themove.thrillist.com/link.php?M=2181171&N=56173&C=25f0fb7663659a52572fbc99fe5fd818&L=38129
Best Happy Hour: Clipper Club Lounge at The Airtel Plaza
7277 Valjean Ave, Van Nuys; 818.997.7676
"Lotta great hors d'ouvres, and reasonably priced drinks",
from 4-7 Mon-Fri at this hotel bar, which serves patrons and
crew from the commercial-plane-free Van Nuys Airport --
where amateur pilots get their courage up.
Happy hour's got $2 off beer and wine and $3 off cocktails;
check it all out at
http://themove.thrillist.com/link.php?M=2181171&N=56173&C=25f0fb7663659a52572fbc99fe5fd818&L=38130
Best place to take a "regular girl":
Saddle Peak Lodge
419 Cold Canyon Rd, Calabasas; 818.222.3888
"It's got a very romantic vibe there, but do NOT bring your
date if she's a vegetarian. Of course, if you love the Lodge
[and therefore need to break up], you can always drop her
using my favorite excuse: 'It's not you, it's meat'".
Stay classy at http://themove.thrillist.com/link.php?M=2181171&N=56173&C=25f0fb7663659a52572fbc99fe5fd818&L=38131
Best "Hidden Secret":
Sushi Don
4816 Laurel Canyon Blvd, Studio City; 818.762.8720
From the Sasabune sushi master comes this tiny strip-mall
rawfishery, with "the exact same fish but for a lot less
money". (Insert gross Ron Jeremy joke here.)
The menus are at http://themove.thrillist.com/link.php?M=2181171&N=56173&C=25f0fb7663659a52572fbc99fe5fd818&L=38132
Best place to have sex:
"If you wanna get really kinky, and you're on Topanga
Canyon, go towards Santa Suzanna Pass, go down about a mile,
and there's a ranch there where Charles Manson used to hang
out. There's an electricity in the air where those idiots
used to live, and have sex all the time. So take a girl
there, get all nasty and dirty, and say, 'Let's do it
Charles Manson's way'". Yes, that sexy Charles Manson way
everyone romanticizes.
Check out the trailer at http://themove.thrillist.com/link.php?M=2181171&N=56173&C=25f0fb7663659a52572fbc99fe5fd818&L=38125
the first 10 people to email oneeyedmonstercontest@gmail.com
with their address get a free DVD of the movie
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Keep a civil tongue.