Neatorama

---

• 12 Crazy Christmas Foods
• Documentary Showcases Struggle Faced By Detroit Firefighters
• LEGO Scavenger Hunt at CERN
• Adorable Animals in Holiday Sweaters
• Mapping Your Dialect
• Animated Sci-fi Short - Somewhere
• Sons of Anarchy Gingerbread Men
• A Warped Window in London
• I Was Black Widow Once, It Was Awful
• Whodunit: The Genie, the Movie Star, and the Hobo
• Epic Fantasy Animated Short - Exordium
• The Real Leg Lamp

12 Crazy Christmas Foods Posted: 24 Dec 2013 04:00 AM PST Christmas may be a time to spend with your family, but it’s also an excuse to eat great fatty foods. While most people seem to stick with their family’s tried and true recipes, these outrageously over-the-top Christmas recipes might just be what it takes to inspire you to try something new this year. Oh Crawfish Tree, Oh Crawfish Tree If you want to make a food Christmas-y, just shape it into a Christmas tree before serving and voila –it’s festive. Need proof? Well, it’s hard to beat this fantastic crawfish tree spotted in a 1962 cookbook by Steve Noyes, who, like me, wonders what sits atop this fishy tree. I hope it’s salmon pate shaped like an angel. Frosty the Cheeseball Man (Video Link) The saddest part of Frosty the Snowman’s tale is when he melts –even if we know that one day he’ll be back to life again. In Charles Phoenix’s Frosty the Cheeseball Man story though, the melting is only the beginning of a delicious fondue treat. It’s by far the most fun way to serve a cheeseball at a holiday party. Holiday Scotch Eggs Scotch eggs are a delicious year-round treat that involves wrapping hardboiled eggs in sausage and then deep frying the whole mess. To add a little holiday touch to the recipe, Adora’s Box used quail eggs and combined the sausage with chestnuts and cranberries. Delicious, deep fried and seasonal? Count me in. The True Love Roast If you’ve ever noticed how many birds are in the Twelve Days of Christmas, then the name should give you some idea of what you’re in for when you order the True Love Roast from Heal Farm in Devon, England. While the company doesn’t follow the recipe of the song, it does feature twelve different types of birds (48 birds in total) with eight types of stuffing. In all, this Frankenbird feast feeds 125 people, and takes about 10 hours to cook. As for what specific birds and stuffings to expect, here’s their rundown: Goose filled with orange and walnut stuffing. Chicken with hazelnut and ginger. Pheasant with juniper stuffing. Aylesbury duck with sage and onion. Barbary duck with Persian fruit stuffing. Poussin and guinea fowl layered with parsley, lemon and thyme. Partridge and pigeon squab set in juniper stuffing. Mallard duck layered with cranberry and lemon and whole boned quail filled with cranberry and orange relish. TurDunkin' Don’t let the name fool you. This TurDunkin’ by Unwholesome Foods doesn’t contain multiple types of fowl like its “derkin” cousin. Instead, it is a turkey brined in orange and strawberry Dunkin’ Donuts Coolattas, stuffed with Dunkin’ Donuts Munchkins, covered in chocolate and sprinkles and served with hash browns and coffee gravy. It’s like all the best breakfast foods got together and made a baby with your favorite Christmas dish. Turkey Cake Hate having to plate mashed potatoes, turkey, sweet potatoes, etc. all individually? Then maybe you should give Chow’s Turkey Cake a chance. While they invented this dish for Thanksgiving, it could easily be served up for a festive Christmas dish instead.  Essentially, this dish consists of turkeyloaf layers held together with mashed potatoes and topped with sweet potatoes and marshmallows. Finally you can skip piling them all on your plate in a pile and just take a slice of cake instead. Deep Fried Christmas Dinner It’s common knowledge that deep frying anything makes it better and while plenty of people deep fry their turkey these days, the rest of Christmas dinner is still largely ignored by the fryer. But Chris Christoforou, owner of England’s Hollywood Fish Bar, aims to change all of that. His restaurant’s deep fried Christmas dinner includes turkey, potatoes, stuffing, broccoli, carrots, pigs in a blanket, brussel sprouts and a pie all deep fried to crispy, fatty perfection. If only we could have the Neatorama family Christmas in England. Christmas Dinner in a Can If you’ve always enjoyed the conveyance of the military’s MRE meals and wished it was easier to enjoy such simplicity when it comes to big holiday meals, then you might just be the ideal customer for the Hot Can Christmas Dinner or the Tinner. Yes, there are, indeed, two separate companies selling (or at least claiming to sell) Christmas dinners that come from a can. The Hot Can is a self-heating product that merely requires you to open the rubber lid, place the lid under the can, pierce the outer jacket with the included key and then peel open the can. The specially designed packaging will actually heat up your dinner for you. When it’s all ready, enjoy a turkey casserole with winter vegetables, sausage, stuffing balls and a cranberry jelly. Alternatively, the Tinner provides you with a complete Christmas dinner although you will actually have to heat it yourself. Inside each Tinner, you will find scrambled eggs and bacon, mince pies, turkey, potatoes, gravy, stuffing, cranberry sauce, raw carrots and parsnips, brussel sprouts or broccoli, and a Christmas pudding to finish things off. Either way you go, it’s a great way to enjoy Christmas dinner without leaving the house to visit family or hitting the stove to cook up something tasty. Cherpumple Pie If your turducken, Twelve Days Roast or TurDunkin’ didn’t satiate your need for things stuffed in other things prior to baking, then the Cherpumple should. This glorious beast of a dessert invented by Charles Phoenix is made by baking a pumpkin pie inside a spice cake, an apple pie inside a yellow cake and a cherry pie inside a white cake and then piling them together and securing the bonds with frosting. The Eggnog Cake It might not be quite as out there as the Cherpumple, but a twelve-layer, red-and-green, eggnog-flavored Christmas cake is certainly worth a mention when it comes to crazy holiday foods. You can find a recipe to make one for yourself over at Bakingdom. Pickle Candy Canes For another fun take on a Christmas classic, don’t forget the NeatoShop’s Pickle Candy Canes that taste as salty and sweet as they look –though they probably aren’t as refreshing as the classic version . The Nativity Scene By the way, food doesn’t have to just fill your belly during the holiday season, it can also be used to decorate as John discovered with this great food-based nativity set. Do you already eat something sort of nutty for Christmas? If so, tell us about your favorite crazy Christmas treat in the comments.

Documentary Showcases Struggle Faced By Detroit Firefighters Posted: 24 Dec 2013 02:00 AM PST (Video Link) Detroit has had it rough over the last few decades, and between plant shutdowns resulting in massive job loss, crime running rampant and an overall economic crisis that's barely showing any sign of turning around the Motor City is in desperate need of a miracle. However, those who chose to stay in their city, and fight for their city, have a lot of heart, and no one epitomizes the survival spirit of Detroit like the firefighters who battle arson on a daily basis using outdated equipment and expecting nothing in return for their bravery. This documentary, entitled Detours, showcases the struggle Detroit's Highland Park firefighters face on a daily basis, and sheds some light on the serial arson problem which threatens to tear Detroit down from the inside. Via Super Punch

LEGO Scavenger Hunt at CERN Posted: 24 Dec 2013 12:00 AM PST When the Google Street View team went to CERN in Geneva, the staff was ready. They hid about twenty LEGO minifigs amongst the equipment to be photographed for posterity. And they challenge us to find them! Take the tour (you can start here) and take screenshots when you find minifigs. When you've got at least three, send them in to TreasureHunt-ComputingCentre@cern.chx and enter their contest. There will be two winners, one drawn from the general public and one limited to CERN employees. The prize will be your choice from the CERN gift shop. Sweet! There's a floor plan to help you navigate at Wired UK. -via ars technica

Adorable Animals in Holiday Sweaters Posted: 23 Dec 2013 10:00 PM PST Thing ugly Christmas sweaters are just for humans? Think again. There are plenty of critters out there that have fantastically terrible sweaters of their own (and some with quite nice sweaters as well).  Of course, the biggest difference between humans and cats and dogs wearing ugly sweaters is that critters look absolutely adorable even in the world's ugliest sweater. In fact, this Buzzfeed article with 26 pictures of animals in sweaters has inspired me to throw an ugly sweater party for dogs next year.

Mapping Your Dialect Posted: 23 Dec 2013 08:00 PM PST Whoa! The New York Times has a 25-question survey that tries to discern where in the U.S. you live (or were raised) by how you pronounce words. They pegged me pretty good, as I live in the triangle plotted by the cities shown in the above map. Well, I actually live a little to the east, but there are no big cities there, and I did spend ten years in western Tennessee. The questions are based on the Harvard Dialect Survey. When you are through with the survey, you'll get a map like this, and three smaller maps showing which particular words were most instrumental in finding your home. How well did it find where you are from? -via Boing Boing

Animated Sci-fi Short - Somewhere Posted: 23 Dec 2013 06:00 PM PST (Video Link) Even when you’re drifting through the inky black recesses of outer space you’re still going somewhere- maybe you’re headed towards the surface of a planet, into the heart of a black hole or towards certain doom in the midst of an asteroid belt. In the animated short Somewhere an unfortunate one armed astronaut finds himself stranded on a strange alien planet while his wife awaits his return...with his missing arm in tow. Somewhere was created by Nicolas Menard, a student at the Royal College of Art in London, who decided to give it a kitschy hand drawn look despite the fact that it was created using digital animation software. Via Laughing Squid

Sons of Anarchy Gingerbread Men Posted: 23 Dec 2013 04:00 PM PST This cookie collection is called "Crumbs of Anarchy," and they're made by Cakes by Erin in Haverhilll, Massachusetts. If you watch Sons of Anarchy, you will be able to pick out your favorite SAMCRO members by their icing. If you don't watch Sons of Anarchy, it's a TV drama about a motorcycle gang. The gingerbread men are $5 each, and since they're so popular, Erin is working on the best way to ship them long-distance. See more pictures of the gingerbread men at the bakery's Facebook page. -via Uproxx

A Warped Window in London Posted: 23 Dec 2013 02:00 PM PST Surreal design might not be the first thing you think about when you consider churches from the 1700s, but London's Church of St. Martin in the Fields might surprise you with this wonderfully warped window designed by architect Shirazeh Houshiary. The original window was destroyed during the air raids of WWII and while the new design might not be what you'd expect to see in a neoclassical building, the use of thick frosted glass with a clear centerpiece is a perfect way to promote the clarity one hopes to get from prayer. You can see more fantastic pictures of the window and read more about it over at Homes and Hues. And, if you like surreal design elements, don't miss the Mysterious Lawn Home of Frohnleiten, Austria.

I Was Black Widow Once, It Was Awful Posted: 23 Dec 2013 12:00 PM PST Oh Tardar Sauce, is there anything you can't make more awesome? Even The Avengers is improved with your sour face thanks to Etsy seller NerdMashup, who stays true to her name with these fantastically fun Grumpy superheroes. She has pretty much the entire Avengers team and the Justice League as acted out by Mrs. Tardar Sauce, but if you prefer the Minions from Despicable Me, she also has plush versions of them decked out as your favorite heroes. Via The Mary Sue

Whodunit: The Genie, the Movie Star, and the Hobo Posted: 23 Dec 2013 10:00 AM PST The following is a Whodunit by Hy Conrad featuring Jonah Bixby, a twelve-year-old crime solver and son of a police detective. Can you solve the crime? Meet Jonah Bixby Jonah Bixby was not your average twelve year-old. He spent more time in police stations than most career criminals. And although he had just started middle school, Jonah was single-handedly responsible for bringing more than a few of those career criminals to justice. But let's start at the beginning.... Jonah's mother and his father had both been police detectives in the city's Major Crimes Division, solving murders and assaults and high-profile robberies. It was while working there that they met and fell in love, then got married and had a son. When Jonah was only five, his father was killed in the line of duty. At that point, Carol Bixby could have retired from the force. But she didn't. She stayed busy with the most important job she knew, law enforcement. And that's how young Jonah became the unofficial mascot of the Beaverton Police Department. From the first grade on, Jonah would get out of school each day, walk across the street to the Fifth Precinct, and wait until his mother got off her shift. Carol's fellow officers took turns keeping an eye on him. Detective Massey from the Fraud Squad helped young Jonah with his math homework while Sergeant Gonzales tutored him in Spanish. Jonah was blessed with an inquisitive mind and an eye for detail. And his love for police work came naturally.  Before long, he was making deductions even the best officers on the force couldn't come up with and whispering them to his mother. Little did the other detectives know that many of Detective Bixby's toughest crimes were being solved by her preteen son. Detective Bixby picked her son up from school, waving him quickly into the car. "We just got an anonymous tip," Carol Bixby said as she pulled away from the curb. "The Diamond Expo is going to be robbed today." Jonah had been looking forward to going home to his usual after-school snack, but this was even better. "Diamond Expo? Isn't that at the Hotel Royale?" "Right, as always," Ms. Bixby said as she turned down First Street. "The tip says Margo the Cat will be involved. No one knows what she looks like, so we're blanketing the hotel with undercover officers." She parked at a broken meter and whisked her son into the hotel lobby. "You stay here," she ordered as they passed the hotel shop. "And try to stay out of trouble. This case is for grown-ups." Jonah did as he was told, but kept his eyes peeled. What caught his attention first was not a woman but a man, burly and bald, like a genie in a fairy tale. The genie was loitering in the hotel lobby's shop. Eventually he bought a bottle of aspirin, foot powder, and a pack of anti-snoring strips. Right next to the shop was the hotel's jewelry store. Jonah saw a man in there, perfectly dressed and movie-star handsome. He was browsing the display cases, even though the Diamond Expo, a hundred feet away, contained many more interesting samples. The third suspect resembled a street person. His tousled hair and scruffy whiskers reminded Jonah of the hobos he'd seen in old photographs. The man was circling the lobby's flower arrangements, smelling the roses, and looking over his shoulder. It was at about this time that Jonah wandered into the shop and became distracted by a mystery novel in the book rack. He picked it up, read the jacket blurb, examined the cover illustration, and was convinced that he'd figured out the ending....  And then the lights went out. Three minutes later, when the hotel's power came back on, his mother had rejoined him. Things were bad. Despite the police presence, Margo had struck again, using the darkness and the failure of the alarm system to get away with two million dollars' worth of gems. Detective Bixby blamed herself. "We knew Margo had just gotten married, so we should have known she'd have an accomplice. There's a power closet right in the lobby. Her husband must have slipped in and cut the lines." Jonah described the three suspicious-looking men. "Maybe one of them is her husband," he suggested. All three were brought over for questioning. The genie's name was Alfred Kingsley. He claimed to be a bachelor, living alone in the suburbs. "I drove in to see the Expo, then bought a few things I'd been meaning to pick up." The movie star was Cliff McCaskey, a salesman who worked at one of the Expo's jewelry booths. "I was just on a break," he told them. "Out of curiosity, I stepped into the jewelry shop. The stuff at my booth was much better." The hobo claimed to be homeless and was carrying no I.D. "My name is Homer Gates. I came in to get out of the cold. I hung out by the flowers, hoping to grab a few and sell them on the street." Jonah listened to all three stories, then whispered to his mother. "That man is lying," he said, pointing at one of them. I think he's Margo's husband." WHO WAS JONAH POINTING AT? WHAT WAS THE MAN LYING ABOUT? Show Answer Detective Bixby eyed the man her son was pointing to. "The bald guy?" Jonah nodded, "He claims to be a bachelor living alone, and yet he bought a package of anti-snoring nose strips. If you live alone, there's no one around to tell you that you snore. My guess is his new wife, Margo the Cat, complained about his snoring.  He got to the lobby early and used the extra time to buy something to help him stop." The whodunit above was provided by American mystery fiction author Hy Conrad. In addition to his work in mystery and crime puzzles, Hy was also one of the original writers for the groundbreaking TV series Monk. Currently, Hy is working on mystery novel series "Abel Adventures" as well as the Monk series of novels, starting with Mr. Monk Helps Himself (published by Penguin, order from Amazon here) Check out Hy's official website and Facebook page - and stay tuned for more whodunits puzzlers on Neatorama from the master of whodunit mysteries himself!

Epic Fantasy Animated Short - Exordium Posted: 23 Dec 2013 08:00 AM PST (Video Link) Are you tired of all the holiday cheer and happiness that comes with Christmas? Looking to scar your eyeballs with a bit of the old ultraviolence? Well here’s an epic fantasy short that’s sure to please fans of the animated film Heavy Metal and anyone who likes their cartoons full of hardcore realism. It’s called Exordium, and it uses the rotoscoping technique, made popular by Ralph Bakshi and the folks who made that A-ha video for "Take On Me" that everybody knows and loves. which brings a humanistic feel to the brutal realm in which the story takes place. Exordium was created by a madman named Gorgonaut, a guy whose idea of holiday cheer revolves around heads on pikes and making leather armor out of flying reindeer. (NSFW due to animated violence) Via Super Punch

The Real Leg Lamp Posted: 23 Dec 2013 06:00 AM PST Redditor cit046286 uses a prosthetic leg since her battle with bone cancer two years ago (diagnosed while she was deployed to Afghanistan). For a Christmas party, she stuffed lights inside the leg! That's a festive look, and it came in handy when the power went out for 15 minutes during the party. Best comment: "cit046286 with your leg so bright, won't you guide my sleigh tonight?" It sure beats any Christmas sweater I've seen!

You are subscribed to email updates from Neatorama To stop receiving these emails, you may unsubscribe now.	Email delivery powered by Google
Google Inc., 20 West Kinzie, Chicago IL USA 60610