The Daily Reckoning Presents... April 2, 2015 Archives | Unsubscribe 27 Facts and One Drunken Blogger Explain Why the U.S. Economy Isn't Recovering Readers ask that we keep the laughs comin'... so we oblige... But first, we put on a straight face to outline 27 facts that show where there's been no economic recovery... Then, reports roll in of an intoxicated Brookings Institution blogger telling a local bar crowd just how screwed the U.S. economy really is... External Advertisement October 15th—a new technology is going to disrupt the existing money and payments infrastructure Why should you get in on this now? #1 – There's A TON of Money to Be Made. Investing in this new technology today will be like getting in on credit cards in the 1950s… debit cards in the 1970s… and online banking in the 1990s. #2 – This IS The Future. The six largest U.S. banks, the world's largest payments processing firm, and over 220,000 U.S. retailers are backing it. Even the U.S. Government is in full support. Click here for the full story. Baltimore, Maryland April 2, 2015 Dear Reader, "And a Happy April Fools' Day to you too!" replied one reader soon after yesterday's reckoning hit your inbox. "Hilarious article!" writes another. "Very funny. Thanks for the laugh!" "Excellent! I laughed and slapped my thigh. Keep it up!" Heh. Don't worry -- we plan to keep the laughs coming today. Partly because we'd like to give our fingers a rest… and partly because we're heading into Easter weekend. Such as markets are closed tomorrow for Good Friday, we won't be publishing your normally scheduled reckoning. We figured that's as good as an excuse as any to slightly tweak and republish one of our favorite gags, below. It seemed fitting, as we've poked fun at Ben Bernanke's maiden foray into blogging this week... But first, we'll sit up straight for a minute and put on our most serious-looking face… if only to set the stage. Earlier this year, blogger Michael Snyder outlined 27 facts that show how the America's middle class has fared for the last six years. Read his (slightly edited) listicle below our signoff and then scroll down for a breaking news report… Cheers, Peter Coyne The Daily Reckoning American families in the middle 20% of the income scale now earn less money than they did in 2008. American families in the middle 20% of the income scale have a lower net worth than they did in 2008. According to a Washington Post article published just a few days ago, more than 50% of the children in U.S. public schools now come from low-income homes. This is the first time that this has happened in at least 50 years. According to a Census Bureau report that was recently released, 65% of all children in the United States are living in a home that receives some form of aid from the federal government. In 2008, the total number of business closures exceeded the total number of businesses being created for the first time ever, and that has continued to happen every single year since then. In 2008, 53% of all Americans considered themselves to be "middle class." But by 2014, only 44% of all Americans still considered themselves to be "middle class." In 2008, 25% of all Americans in the 18-29-year-old age bracket considered themselves to be "lower class." But in 2014, an astounding 49% of all Americans in that age range considered themselves to be "lower class." Traditionally, owning a home has been one of the key indicators that you belong to the middle class. So what does the fact that the rate of homeownership in America has been falling for seven years say? According to a survey that was conducted last year, 52% of all Americans cannot even afford the house that they are living in right now. After accounting for inflation, median household income in the United States is 8% lower than it was when the last recession started in 2007. According to one recent survey, 62% of all Americans are currently living paycheck to paycheck. At this point, one out of every three adults in the United States has an unpaid debt that is "in collections." In 2008, 60.6% of all working-age Americans had a job. Today, that number is sitting at only 59.2%… Since 2009, the average duration of unemployment in the United States has risen from 19.8 weeks to 32.8 weeks. It is hard to believe, but an astounding 53% of all American workers make less than $30,000 a year. In 2009, our yearly trade deficit with China was $226 billion. Last year, it was more than $314 billion. In 2008, the U.S. debt to GDP ratio was under 70%. Today, it is over 101%. The U.S. national debt is on pace to approximately double during the eight years of the Obama administration. In other words, under this administration, the U.S. government will accumulate about as much debt as it did under all of the other presidents in U.S. history combined. According to The New York Times, the "typical American household" is now worth 36% less than it was worth a decade ago. The poverty rate in the United States has been at 15% or above for three consecutive years. This is the first time that has happened since 1965. From 2009-2013, the U.S. government spent a whopping $3.7 trillion on welfare programs. Since 2008, the number of Americans on food stamps has gone from 32 million to 46 million. Ten years ago, the number of women in the U.S. that had full-time jobs outnumbered the number of women in the U.S. on food stamps by more than a 2-to-1 margin. But now the number of women in the U.S. on food stamps actually exceeds the number of women that have full-time jobs. One recent survey discovered that about 22% of all Americans have had to turn to a church food pantry for assistance. An astounding 45% of all African-American children in the United States live in areas of "concentrated poverty." 40.9% of all children in the United States that are living with only one parent are living in poverty. According to a report that was released late last year by the National Center on Family Homelessness, the number of homeless children in the United States has reached a new all-time record high of 2.5 million. NEVER Worry About a Market Crash Again Did you know right now you can open an account that gives you exposure to the stock market's upside without the downside risk? As one accountholder said, "It only goes up. Never goes down." If you'd like to enjoy perpetual peace of mind, knowing that you'll never lose money as a result of market crashes, then you should click here and learn more about this account. On the other hand, if you're willing to gamble with your nest egg, don't click here. The Daily Reckoning Presents... Breaking news: On Tuesday night, an intoxicated blogger for the Brookings Institution informed local bar patrons of the dangers of reckless spending and money printing. The Onion reports... ****************************** Drunken Ben Bernanke Tells Everyone at Neighborhood Bar How Screwed U.S. Economy Really Is SEWARD, NEBRASKA -- Claiming he wasn't afraid to let everyone in attendance know about "the real mess we're in," former Federal Reserve chairman and Distinguished Brookings Institution blogger, Ben Bernanke, reportedly got drunk Tuesday and told everyone at Elwood's Corner Tavern about how absolutely f*cked the U.S. economy actually is. Bernanke, who sources confirmed was "totally sloshed," arrived at the drinking establishment at approximately 5:30 p.m., ensconced himself upon a bar stool, and consumed several bottles of Miller High Life and a half-dozen shots of whiskey while loudly proclaiming to any patron who would listen that the economic outlook was "pretty goddamned awful if you want the God's honest truth." "Look, they don't want anyone except for the Washington, D.C. bigwigs to know how bad sh*t really is," said Bernanke, slurring his words as he spoke. "Mounting debt exacerbated -- and not relieved -- by unchecked consumption, rock bottom interest rates, and the grim realities of an inevitable fracking bubble crisis are projected to leave our entire economy in the sh*tter for, like, a generation, man, I'm telling you." "And hell, as long as we're being honest, I might as well tell you that a truer estimate of the U.S. unemployment rate is actually up around 16 percent, with a 0.7 percent annual rate of economic growth if we're lucky -- if we're lucky," continued Bernanke, nearly knocking a full beer over while gesturing with his hands. "Of course, if everybody knew that, it would likely cripple financial markets across the entire f*cking globe, even in various emerging economies with self- sustaining growth." After launching into an extended 45-minute diatribe about shortsighted moves by "those bastards in Congress" that could potentially exacerbate the nation's already deeply troublesome budget imbalance, the former Federal Reserve chairman reportedly bought a round of tequila shots for two customers he had just met who were seated on either side of him, announcing, "I love these guys." Numerous bar patrons slowly nodded in agreement as Bernanke went on to suggest the United States could pass three or four more stimulus packages and "it wouldn't even matter." "You think that's going to create long-term economic growth, let alone promote job creation?" Bernanke said. "We're way beyond that, my friend. There are no jobs, okay? There's nothing. I think that calls for another drink, don't you?" While using beer bottles and pretzel sticks in an attempt to explain to the bartender the importance of infusing another $650 billion into the bond market, the inebriated Fed chairman nearly fell off his stool and had to be held up by the patron sitting next to him. WAIT! Don't File Your Taxes Yet... There's one simple tax form that could put as much as $2,600 in your pocket by April 15. A form only three out of 100 taxpaying Americans file every year. It's so little-known your accountant probably doesn't even know it exists. You won't believe how easy it is. And it's all 100% legal. TAKE A LOOK AT THIS... Another bargoer confirmed Bernanke stood about 2 inches from her face and sprayed her with saliva, claiming inflation was soon going to "totally screw" consumer confidence and then asking if he could bum a smoke. "Sure, we could hold down long-term interest rates and pursue a program of quantitative easing, but c'mon, we all know that's not going to make the slightest bit of difference when it comes to output, demand, or employment," Bernanke said before being told to "try to keep [his] voice down" by the bartender. "And trust me, with the value of the U.S. dollar, import costs going through the roof, and numerous world governments unprepared for their own substantial debt burdens, sh*t's not looking too good for us abroad, either." "God, I'm so wasted," added Bernanke, resting his head on the bar. Later in the evening, Richard Kampman, a truck driver who was laid off in 2010, said Bernanke approached him in the men's restroom and attempted to strike up a conversation about various factors contributing to the current financial crisis. "He stumbled up to the urinal and started mumbling on about the depressed housing sector or something," said Kampman, who claimed Bernanke had to use both hands on the wall to steady himself. "Then after a while he just sort of stopped and I couldn't tell if he was laughing or crying." "Then he puked all over the sink and the mirror," Kampman added. Customers at the bar told reporters the "sh*tfaced" and disruptive Bernanke refused to pay for his drinks with U.S. currency, claiming it was "worthless." Witnesses also confirmed that near the end of the evening, Bernanke put money into the jukebox and selected Dire Straits' "Money For Nothing" to play five times in a row. "This is what it's all about," said Bernanke, who reportedly danced alone in the middle of the dark tavern. "F*cking love this song." BE SURE TO ADD dr@dailyreckoning.com to your address book. Additional Articles & Commentary: Join the conversation! Follow us on social media: The Daily Reckoning is committed to protecting and respecting your privacy. We do not rent or share your email address. By submitting your email address, you consent to Agora Financial delivering daily email issues and advertisements. To end your Daily Reckoning e-mail subscription and associated external offers sent from Daily Reckoning, feel free to click here. Please read our Privacy Statement. For any further comments or concerns please email us at dr@dailyreckoning.com. If you are you having trouble receiving your Daily Reckoning subscription, you can ensure its arrival in your mailbox by whitelisting the Daily Reckoning. © 2015 Agora Financial, LLC. 808 Saint Paul Street, Baltimore MD 21202. 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