Tumblr User Assumes That Sauron Isn't Sexy, Gets Told the Truth and more...

It's a story as old as time. Someone tries to make a point about popular fiction. Another person makes a bold claim. Then the rest of us all get to learn that a bunch of people have a thing for the bad guy from Lord of The Rings. It's reminiscent of these tumblr users who had questions about gay Klingons or this quick tumblr post that asked the hard questions about centaurs.

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Text - booksbybingo Follow villains are hard to design. making them ugly is dangerous, depending on what traits you choose to frame as monstrous or undesirable, you could very well end up saying something fatphobic, racist, anti-semitic, etc but if you make a hot villain then people will get thirsty and demand redemptions and refuse to acknowledge their evil actions, no matter how despicable e victoria-october Solution: Full body armor and masks. You don't see people shipping themselves with Sau

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Text - mellenabrave Follow -you think? macko-99 Follow .don't look up Sauron on A03 arofili Follow Nothing fails to crack me up like this post - the vain hope that somewhere out there is some awful nasty thing that there is not also a person whose kink that is, the idea that covering something up won't make people obsessed with finding out what it looks like underneath, the surface level understanding of Sauron and complete lack of knowledge of the Silmarillion and it's fandom, the fact that Sau

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Jaw - prismatic-starstuff Follow The Poster Of The Comment: You don't see people shipping themselves with Sauron! The Very Large And Dedicated Community Of Sauronfuckers In The Tolkien Fandom, collectively: WHEEZE

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Fictional character - silly-jellyghoty Follow Point. For those who have not read Sillmarilion, Sauron used to look something like this whitetigerdemoness Follow #YO OUTTA THE WAY HOBBIT BOY #IM BOUTA GET IT desarea-doodles Follow I learned a lot this is hilarious

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Tagged: sauron , tumblr , Lord of the Rings , fandom , lol , sexy , fans , stupid

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Bride Wants To Airbrush Over Bridesmaid's Tattoos

Gotta love how this bride says she doesn't want to be "that bride" and then proceeds to be exactly that bride. Weddings seem to have that uncanny knack for bringing out people's inner toxic perfectionist. Sometimes people like this bride can get so caught up in trying to make sure everything fits their vision for the perfect day, that they end up being way more insensitive than they'd ever normally be. We've got to hope that's the case for this bride. Check out some more wedding drama with this bridezilla Karen who ended up looking like a pauper at her own wedding.

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Text - asked a question in •.. 36 mins · SOS: I need advice when it comes to large tats. My foster sister has a few very large mural tattoos on her arms! She is the only one in the wedding who will have tattoos showing. We paying a lot for the perfect wedding and photographer so I am really struggling with what to do. I do not want to be that bride, but they are going to stand out like a sore thumb as they are very vibrant. Do I ask for the airbrush make up lady to go over them as I know that's

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Text - MakeMeADonut • 3d 3 1 Award I literally do not understand why the wedding aesthetic being flawless is so important to some people. Just surround yourself with people you love and get married to your favourite person. Reply 2.1k 3 ...

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Text - Tenaciousleesha • 3d My husband's cousin was the best man and he asked if we wanted him to shave his (very full and quite impressive) beard. My husband's response was no way, the beard is part of who you are. Without a beard he'd look like a stranger. I don't understand wanting to police someone's look. You knew what they looked like when you picked them. Reply 1 427 3 +

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Text - Caca74houete • 3d "I don't want to be that bride"... Proceeds to be that bride Reply 1 395 •..

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Text - VVXXWW • 3d Why can't the wedding be perfect AND feature attendants/family/friends with tattoos? Why do tattoos/ colorful hair/arm slings/whatever automatically make a wedding less perfect? I thought the day was supposed to be about bridezilla??? Reply 272 3 ...

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Text - pseudo_civilized • 3d Edit them out??? As a wedding photographer, if a client asked me to photoshop out large tattoos on a bridesmaid (who will presumably be in a lot of the photos), l'd probably fire that client unless they were willing to pay a steep fee per edit. That's soo000 much detailed photoshop work and very hard to make it look decent. Just deal with the tattoos lady, they're not hurting anybody! Geez. Reply 1 535 3 ...

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Text - RavenMay • 3d I'm constantly reminded by these stories, of the bride who insisted I remove my prescription glasses for the photos and ceremony (bridesmaid). We're no longer friends, for long and complicated reasons that aren't entirely related to this I apparently need to add. Reply 68 •..

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Text - SpookyMOmmy • 3d She should just add tattoos to everyone else so she won't "stick out" so bad Reply 170 ...

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Text - 77kloklo77 • 3d "Perfect" wedding photos are photos that show your loved ones as they are, in all their glory. ETA what looks "perfect" now is going to look silly in a few years anyway. See: my mother's floppy bridal hat from 1972, all the puffy sleeves from the mid-1990s, tiaras from the 2000s and, yes, all the barn weddings. That's part of the fun! Reply 39 ...

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Text - Catscurlsandglasses • 3d People like this suuuuuuuuuck. I have large tattoos up my arms, and I'm in a wedding in March. If I was asked to cover them up, I would just step down. I feel bad for the foster sister.. Clearly you aren't that close that some of this personal art bothers you. O Reply 1 82 3 •..

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Text - thehighestwalls • 3d I got kicked out of a wedding party by the bride's mother the day of the wedding because I have full "socks" of tattoos from my knees to my toes. Nothing trashy, but very colorful classic art pieces. Her daughter, my friend who asked me to be one of her bridesmaids, never told her about my tattoos. It was incredibly embarrassing to have a woman shouting in front of everyone that she would not pay for the photographer if I was allowed to be in the photos. Bride did not

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Text - Beginning_Friendship • 3d Yeah, because the "perfect" photos are more important than the actual human beings sharing that day with you. Priorities so fucked up. Reply 1 15 <3 ...

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Text - my-bug-world • 3d How many people actually look at their wedding photos...? Maybe you have one up in your house (of bride and groom) but unless your a narcissist, no one surely gives a fck a few years later... Reply 1 15 ...

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Tagged: bride , FAIL , cringe , Awkward , tattoos , wedding , ridiculous , Reddit , Crazy Brides , bridezilla

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Zodiac Killer's Unsolved 340 Cypher Gets Cracked After 51 Years

It only took 51 grueling years of hard work and dedication, but on December 3rd, 2020 an international three-person team of codebreakers finally managed to have a breakthrough on the evil, notorious Zodiac Killer's 340 cypher. By December 5th they officially cracked the damn thing. Way to go guys!

Submitted by: (via David Oranchak)

Tagged: impressive , serial killer , smart , Video , win , zodiac killer

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Genealogy Discovery Ignites Nasty Family Conflict

Honestly, it sounds like there were some folks in this family that could've benefited from not making assumptions about their ancestry, and then proceeding to carve a whole lifestyle out of it. It can really pay off in the long run to just do your research, before making those big moves, like assuming you're Native American when you're actually Eastern European. Hopefully, this family was able to put their differences aside, quell the rage, and ultimately make up.

Check out some more ancestry kit drama with this family that got blindsided by a shocking ancestry kit revelation.

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Text - AITA for making potentially "embarrassing" family genealogy discoveries visible on Ancestry.com? Not the A-hole I've been the extended family's amateur genealogist for more than 20 years. I've built an enormous family tree on Ancestry.com. Names and details on all living people are hidden (unless I give special permission to someone). Info on deceased people is visible.

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Text - Like a lot of American families, there's a persistent myth that we have some Native American heritage. My late paternal grandmother told us that she was descended from a French soldier who married a Native American woman. Well, Grandma (who was a very sweet lady) made this up. She was orphaned at age 2 and didn't even remember her biological parents. Maybe she just wanted an origin story? I figured out who her biological parents were earlier this year by triangulating my DNA matches and s

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Text - I'd actually forgotten about the Native American stories. My dad is no longer alive, but I shared this info with his brother, my uncle. He thanked me but asked, "Are you 100% SURE there's no Indians [his word, not mine] in our tree?" Yep, 100% sure, I told him. He responded, "Well, Ronny [fake name] isn't gonna like hearing that." Ronny is my cousin – I haven't seen him since we were kids -- and he apparently took the Native American thing to heart. He went out and got a bunch of tattoos

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Text - I had and have NO intention of telling anybody in Ronny's world that this is untrue. But he did not take the news well. His dad shared my number and I got a text from Ronny telling me to take down any info about our family origin immediately. I responded no, and reassured him that his name wasn't displayed and his secret was safe with me. I'm not trying to "out" anybody as anything. I don't share findings on Facebook and you'd really have to dig through the Ancestry.com tree and know what

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Text - I'm sorry Ronny didn't have the foresight to do his own research before "going native," but I don't think I'm an AH for accurately representing our family history where someone else could see it. Or am l? 1 7.2k 3 1, Share 825

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Text - Thia_M • 1d • Asshole Aficionado [15] NTA. It was a huge thing, back in the day, for grandparents to tell family we were part native American. I have no idea why. My mom's side was "Cherokee". We aren't and are as white as could be. We are Irish, English, and German with a little Russian thrown in. Reply 1 2.5k , ...

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Text - username2-4-3-7 • 1d • Asshole Enthusiast [6] This reminds me of a TIFU story about a white guy who adopted an asian baby. He jumped neck deep into Chinese culture. The kiddo went to a cantonese immersion school. Got Chinese aunties and uncles who took him to China to engage with his heritage. White Dad was so proud of his son and his support for his son's heritage. Then when filling out some kind of scholarship paperwork for college, dad had to fish out the original adoption paperwork...

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Text - StAlvis • 1d • Professor Emeritass [97] NTA Like a lot of American families, there's a persistent myth that we have some Native American heritage. "I've got some Indian in me" was the earlier generation's "but l've got a black friend!" | Reply 1 1.1k 3 ...

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Text - jrobin99 • 1d NTA. I do genealogy too and WOW I can't believe the amount of people who cling to that old Indian blood story! What is with that?? I heard the same story from my Dad's side. Did some poking around and found lots of people linking to names and graves apparently all made up! First rule of genealogy is to back everything up with proof. Your relative might have started with the hope of having Indian blood before DNA existed. It was easier back then to claim...whole lot harder no

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Text - SnooWoofers4721 • 1d • Partassipant [1] NTA Ronny should have checked and double checked before he based his lifestyle on a story. Good for you for standing up for yourself. Reply 6.5k

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Text - Deus-system-failed • 1d NTA my mom did something similar a few years back, my grandmother claimed her father was a Native American and that's why her skin tone was so dark. Well my mom did some digging because she heavily doubted it, well it wasn't a big secret that my great grandmother was a Gypsy immigrant but she was the only one who DIDN'T LIE. My mother is 96% Greek Romoni, my entire family on my mother's side are Gypsies and super racist against Gypsies even claiming "All Gypsies ar

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Text - hmcfuego • 1d NTA, but my family is actually on the tribal rolls with family ON THE REZ and my DNA came back with absolutely 0 NA. Reply 1 15 < ...

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Text - west_to_southwest • 1d When you remove your cousin's over the top aggressive behavior, this story actually highlights an important issue: genetic privacy. Currently, it is absolutely your right to share genetic results and what not with the world; however, because your family shares genetics, you are sharing other people's genetic results/information with the world too. I can absolutely imagine a case where a family member doesn't necessarily want their genetic information broadcast to th

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Text - coconutshave • 1d • Asshole Aficionado [18] NTA–I understand it sucks for Ronny but he had no right to swear at your or make demands. You didn't do anything wrong to get or share the info. Who knows if gran lied. He knew it was possible it was just a story and l'm sure his Native friends did, too- so even if grandma was the granddaughter of a Native woman, that's what? 1/16th? Isn't the joke that every white American claims to be 1/16th Cherokee? Hard to imagine he told the truth and no o

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Text - thestingofthemonarch • 1d • Partassipant [1] NTA Facts don't make you an asshole, no matter who doesn't like them. Its not like you made a callout post calling him white, he just hates it and thinks that by hiding/censoring actual information it'll somehow make him something he isn't. Also it's YOUR heritage too, your uncle and most certainly Ronny doesn't own you. Q Reply 46 ...

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Text - loligo_pealeii • 1d NTA. It's kind of you to try to hide this and not out Ronny but it's not your fault your genealogical history didn't turn out to be what he wanted. Also, your grandmother was adopted at 2. Ronny had to know there was a good chance her stories weren't accurate. He seriously thinks a 2 year old had a good idea of her family heritage? Also, you're not the only one with a dumbass cousin. Mine got a giant Blackfoot symbol tattooed on her chest and neck at age 18. One too ma

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Text - voxetpraetereanihill • 1d NTA. He's not named, and I seriously doubt anyone's going to go digging. My family tree has been done back to the 1600s on both sides. We've got horse thieves, bigamists, Scottish rebels, Nazi officers, you name it - and all those skeletons are rattling around online for anyone who cares. Except no one cares. lol Reply 4 3 3 ...

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Text - adlittle • 19h • Partassipant [1] NTA. My family did this nonsense too (though thankfully no one turned it into an actual identity). Got the dna testing and confirmed we are like 100% English. The best part was, I got accused of being racist for saying this was all bullshit back in the day. No, l'd be proud of whatever heritage turned up, but there's WAY TOO MANY annoying white people who want to claim the romance and intensely American origin of being Native American, but without having

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Text - toughdog18 • 1d NTA. He's mad because you're exposing his lie. He may well have believed in it, but the truth can hurt. It's unfortunate that this lie is part of his identity. This is why he's defending the lie so aggressively. But that doesn't mean you should take your own info down. He doesn't have to look at it if he doesn't like it. Your uncle is 100% wrong on all levels. Let him be 'disappointed.' What I don't understand is how Ronny found out. Did the "disappointed" uncle take it up

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Text - Ok_Entrepreneur6273 • 1d NTA. He should apologize to the community. It's not wrong that he was mislead it's wrong that he doesn't want to face the truth and the music. Reply Vote

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Text - RexIsAMiiCostume • 1d NTA. I KNOW where my little bit of Native ancestry comes from and I didn't go out and get tattoos of a local tribe that I'm not even descendant of... Cause I know it's too far back to matter. Reply Vote ...

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Tagged: FAIL , genealogy , cringe , ridiculous , family , Reddit , dramatic

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Tumblr Thread: The Unsettling Reason For Unrealistic Animation

Here we are yet again with the wonderful, wandering minds of the Tumblr world delivering just the kind of informative, and unsettling thread that really takes the brain for a trip. Apparently, there's an actual reason why us human beings can feel the cringe chills come on when animation seems to be too realistic. It's called the uncanny valley effect. What makes the effect so unsettling, is reflecting on why we could've developed that kind of "survival instinct" in the first place. Was it because there used to be some sort of alien monster thing scouring the globe back in the day that was a threat to homo sapiens' survival? Maybe so, maybe so. Check out some more gold from Tumblr with these cooks that bonded over their dysfunctional family members.

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Organism - *157 % 15:01 vrabia Folgen NEON NO @Neon woof studios: ok it's absolutely imperative that the audience knows which one is a GIRL wolf and which one is a BOY wolf studios, every single time: ok wait I got it 3:09 AM - Apr 19, 2020 - Twitter for Android pipocaflamingo Folgen Sorry to say, but they do the exact same thing for humans too.

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Animation - @ *I 57 %O 15:01 pipocaflamingo Folgen Sorry to say, but they do the exact same thing for humans too. pipocaflamingo Folgen It's amazing how people in the notes and comments are absolutely FURIOUS at me for the included Frozen comparison. Special shout out to everyone trying to prove that real people look like this. fastascardboard Folgen

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Head - all @ *i 57 % O15:01 fastascardboard Folgen ORIGINAL TheMamelessaoll MY EDIT Roosa Karsson Not to mention that when people edit these

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Blue - @ *I 57 % O15:02 Roosa Karsson Not to mention that when people edit these characters to have better facial proportions, the originals look like bizarre fish people. simonalkenmayer Folgen How humans draw themselves is always fascinating to me despairgyaru op why are you speaking like you aren't human i'm scared simonalkenmayer Folgen Eh...perhaps read my blog description. 61below Folgen

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Text - ll @ *i 57 % 15:02 hauntedcreek Folgen K simonalkenm... Follow The Creature's Cookbook Welcome. You may call me Simon or Simone. I am the author of the Creature's Cookbook novel series, but more importantly, I'm a very old anthropophagic cryptid, or "people eating monster". Yes, a real one. No, not a clever performance art piece or a plea for attention. My books are classified as fiction, but that is entirely the point. I eat humans and I write about it, and for some reason, people find i

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Text - ll @ *i 57 % コ15:02 helloitsbees Folgen this post has EVERYTHING hyenasnake Folgen I think I know the reason for why people prefer "unrealistic" animation. For some reason, humans really don't like things that look like humans but aren't quite human. Hence why a lot of people are uncomfortable with movies with animation like Monster House and The Polar Express. It looks too realistic to us and sets us off. Scientists call this the "Uncanny Valley" effect and its thought to be an evoluti t

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Text - @ *i 57 %D 15:02 Scientists call this the "Uncanny Valley" effect and its thought to be an evolutionary tactic for survival. The funny part is. No other animals that we know of experience the uncanny valley effect. Only humans. Which leaves the question: what was out there that mimicked humans so well and was so dangerous to us that we evolved to have this as a tactic for survival? soft-necromancing-crow Folgen Oh hell yeah this is what l'm here for niuniente Folgen Which leaves the quest

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Green - @ *I 57 %D15:02 athelind Folgen Okay, I've seen this thread a dozen times before, but not with this addendum. vrabia Folgen i made the original post in the throes of unmedicated depression because that's where my sense of humor was at the time. i don't check my activity page. seeing it barge onto my dash months later with +250k notes and this exchange attached to it like a bunch of rattling tin cans attached to the tail of a rabid dog running loose is fucking WILD look-at-all-those-fando

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Text - @ *i 57 % コ15:02 masochist-incarnate Idk why dont we ask the "people eating cryptid" who claims to be from a species that's easy to hide and apparently passes as human who's like, 3 reblogs above this? princesshamlet Folgen Crewmate There is 1 Impostor among us fuckingconversations Folgen Hey fun fact; Back when Homo sapiens weren't the end-all of hominids, we also had some other two legged "humanish" cousins like the Neanderthals, Denisovians, and more! There were nine different species

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Text - @ *i 57 % 15:03 There were nine different species of "humans" By 10,000 years ago, they were all gone. The disappearance of these other species resembles a mass extinction. But there's no obvious environmental catastrophe - volcanic eruptions, climate change, asteroid impact - driving it. Instead, the extinctions' timing suggests they were caused by the spread of a new species, evolving 260,000-350,000 years ago in Southern Africa: Homo sapiens. Neanderthal skeletons show patterns of trau

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Text - @ *i 57 % 15:03 Basically: the reason we as Homo Sapians find other human-ish figures unsettling and have an instinctual fear/aggression response called "The Uncanny Valley" is because we literally TOOK OVER THE WORLD by hunting down and killing every other hominid on the planet. Dunno if the "9 species of hominid genocide" was a result of uncanny valley or the cause of it, but it's a pretty sure bet to guess they're linked. Read more about it here :) isaacsapphire Folgen This is a wonder

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Tagged: unsettling , history , tumblr , animation , creepy , interesting , weird

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Wholesome Memes to Keep Things Moving

Just about anyone could make full use of some wholesome memes now and then. In this world full of chaos and failure, it's good to be reminded that some things are still nice, and there's a base level of understanding between people. It can seem like the world is falling apart sometimes, but it's good to have some wholesome memes to help wade through the muck.

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Action figure - All of humanity Teachers who Genuinely love their job

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Photo caption - Me when Ive finally accepted my receding hairline and I shave my head I'M SO SHINY!

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Cartoon - When your kids start listening to the same heavy metal music you do The Trollercoaster

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Transport - Society People who put trash in their pockets until they find a bin

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Hair - When everything is going wrong at work and you're apologizing and a customer says "oh honey it's not your fault" made with mematic

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Text - When you see your attractive but socially anxious friend hit on someone for the first time. What is he doing? He's beginning to believe.

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Cartoon - me when I tell my wife I don't want anything, but she gets me an apple juice anyway.

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Photo caption - ME, A GAMING VETERAN MY FRIEND, A GAMING VETERAN MY GF. ENJOYING THE LANDSCAPE, WHILE WE ARE PROTECTING HER

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Blue - Reason why Il'm polite to waiters Because I realise they're human beings trying to make a living, not my servants

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Album cover - Nobody: My grandma to me after I changed the TV channel for her: HACKERMAN made with mematic

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Cat - *I start going to the gym* My grandma: Who is that strong man? Show me your muscles! Me:

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Movie - Grandparents Behold Photos of their grandchild Picasso drawing their grandchild make Four-leaf clover their grandchild found My treasure

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People - HEY EVERYBODY THIS GUY IS ASHAMED THAT HE'S SEEING A THERAPIST. SEE NOBODY CARES. ADDRESSING YOUR ISSUES IS KEY FOR LONG TERM EMOTIONAL HEALTH, AND AS YOUR FRIEND I JUST WANT YOU TO KNOW THAT I SUPPORT YOU AND CARE ABOUT YOU.

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Grass - when dad takes and you your friends to the park for ice cream [HELL YEAH]

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Procyon - THERE IS NO TRASH CANNOT @noctumaltrashposts THERE IS ONLY TRASH CAN!

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Cartoon - Michelangelo Da Vinci Caravaggio Italy Masaccio Giotto America Bob Ross

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Seal - Me aged 7 explaining that we will both sleep better if we both go downstairs and get a midnight snack My teddy bear ngflip.com

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Vertebrate - me, just about ready to give up on my career after being unable to find a job in my field since graduating in 2017 finally getting a job in my field that I start in a week

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Cat - When the person you're trying to cheer up says you actually helped. made with mematic

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Games - my favorite teacher Give up on me because I keep failing Or Draw 25 UNO

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Facial expression - My 2 month old puppy seeing me come home from school for the 1st time: My 6 year old dog seeing me come home from school for the 475,892,613th time:

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Text - When you're making small life changes and your depression is trying to downplay the positives Progess is progress!

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Face - Draws branch Draws a second branch because everyone needs a friend

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Saltwater crocodile - Zoom family reunion My two month old cousin going "aaaaaaa" 25 of my adult family members going "AAAAAA" back to her

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Tagged: aww , wholesome , Memes , lol , nice , good , funny , internet memes , clean , funny memes , wholesome tweets , wholesome memes

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Twitter Thread: Hilariously Dumb Bits Between Partners

If you've ever found someone special to share some time with in this mad world, you've likely participated in carrying on some hilariously dumb but highly addictive bit with your partner. You probably had no idea why you were doing it, and why it was so funny without fail every time, but you continued to do with admirable, stubborn persistence.

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Screenshot - livebloggingmydescentintomadness Follow Sophia Benoit @1followernodad Literally nothing on earth is better than repeatedly doing a bit your partner doesn't like 10:51 PM · 26 Jun 20 · Twitter for iPhone Brona C. Titley @bronactitley · 13h Replying to @1followernodad Whenever my wife mentions being gay, I scream "YOU'RE GAY???!" at her, as if I've just learnt it for the first time ♡ 14 t7 91 3,947 Rich James @richjamo · 20h Replying to @1followernodad Whenever my wife comes into the

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Text - C. D. Ford @c_d_ford · 1d Replying to @1followernodad When I'm playing video games I tell my wife I'm dedicating my victory to her and she hates it. Q 14 27 43 2,779 cynthia, she's a really cool dancer @tart.. · 15h v Replying to @1followernodad There's a sign out front of a church facility down the street that has the word "rector" on it. Every time we walk by l yell "Rector? Damn near killed 'er!" and start laughing hysterically 5 27 8 592 Clams Rockefeller @ClamsLaRock · 13h I had a si

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Text - Queen Astro Babby Jess @SpicyAstroBa. · 9h Replying to @1followernodad I pretend to be angry and say "I'm going cycling, don't wait up." Then proceed to get on the stationary bike in the living room adjacent to the couch he's sitting on. 27 1 165 Donnacha Bolger @DrDonieBaseball · 20h Replying to @1followernodad My wife HATES the smell of veggie sausages. Whenever I make them I rush into whatever room she's in and use a sausage as a microphone to REPEAL interview her with. It's the corner

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Text - Douglas King @douglascodes · 15h Replying to @1followernodad I do "That was the name I used to dance under" bit anytime there is a good phrase. A sign that says "Hot Wax" "That was the name .." An ad for "beef tips." "That was.." White gravy. "That was..." Нeavy cream "That was...." %3D 3 107 Matt Ayling @MW_Ayling · 12h Replying to @1followernodad Whenever I see an RV towing a car I gasp and tell my wife, "good lord look how close that guy is tailgating that RV!" She hates it 68 Burden E

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Chin - ABRATHO. IAm TheScott @scottb804 · 13h Replying to @1followernodad I tell my wife more often than I'd like to admit that "P'Il be making a note on your performance evaluation". She hates that. It's been a decade. 27 ♡ 42 Xander King @pastelxbreeze · 16h Replying to @1followernodad I call my boyfriend sport and champ and bud like a midwestern dad because I'm 6 months older than him. He HATES it and then I squish his cheeks and say hes throwing a tantrum and I swear to god I can see his sou

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Text - LAPD Tampon Investigations Unit @Ra... · 15h Replying to @1followernodad The only bit my wife really hates is the Borat voice. The best was when she had an appointment with a midwife. I looked her right in the eyes, slipped into the Borat voice, and yelled "Mid-wiiiiyyyfe!" She murdered me. 1 27 2 112 AHR - Wash Yer Hands @ahopeross · 15h Replying to @1followernodad Too many to count. My favourite may be my ongoing gag that every time I'm responsible for something that I deadpan that I th

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Screenshot - lacey @lacefaced · 13h Replying to @1followernodad My husband says "gas lamp" in place of "gaslight" on purpose as a form of "gaslamping" me. 27 5 2 310 Jeff The Tweeter @DonJewxote · 15h Replying to @1followernodad Acting like I have no idea what she's talking about midway through a conversation. Works with a person, place, or thing. "Gonna hang out with Jimmy after work" "Cool tell Jimmy I said hi" "Who?" 3 163 L Mitch @L_Mitch23 · 19h Replying to @1followernodad I mix up less and

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Text - acab @wherbkat · 12h Replying to @1followernodad My wife is an RN at an ICU in nyc. I started to drive her to work when the pandemic started. When she would put on her mask to get out of the car I would shout "Masquerade!" in the way they do in Phantom of the Opera. Did that for like a month. 27 3 3 153 Char Char Binks @little_lotty · 14h Replying to @1followernodad I like to do this thing when my husband asks me to do something. I put my shirt over my head like a hunchback and say "yes m

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Ear - dinosaur dumps @FaaipMusic · 12h Replying to @1followernodad I've been sending my wife this photo for weeks 35

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Text - Lindsay Lee Wallace @lindsaywallace · 22h Replying to @1followernodad It's this kind of opinion that enables people like my partner to do things like constantly pretend that a faceless man from another dimension is standing in the corner of our room making custard, and frankly I won't stand for it 1 63 Hummus @hummus_tea · 11h This is such an amazingly specific bit I can't help but applaud them for it 1 27 11 Lindsay Lee Wallace @lindsaywallace · 10h yeah his name is The Bellhop and he ha

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Text - Rhi Meow Replying to @1followernodad Every night when I need to get out of bed (while both awake) I roll over my boyfriend instead of getting out of my side I also get in the same way @Rhimeowmeow · 16h 27 1 O 116 Jamieson Bruce @JamiesonBruce · 15h Replying to @1followernodad Whenever tubas are mentioned around here (this happens surprisingly often), I always make reference to the fact that my SO used to play the tuba. She hates that. Also, she has never played the tuba. 1 157 kenzie @ke

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Chin - Daniel Says Abolish Police @DGarraston · 15h Replying to @1followernodad My partner hates puppets, she thinks they're weird and creepy so every now and then when I'm talking to her from the other room, l'll pop my hand around the corner and do the hand puppet thing. GIF ALT 27 1 154

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Text - Billy Christ @RedLetrCrusader · 14h Replying to @1followernodad When my wife says anything close to a truism I say, "It's like that old song:" then I make up a twangy country song anout it. If I really want to bug her l'll make up a whole back story about the song. 2 27 2 79 JM @Jamesjr54 · 12h Need examples. For science. 1 27 10 Billy Christ @RedLetrCrusader · 11h The last hit was "You're Gonna Need a Bigger Spatula Than That" by Plumber Eddie and his Set of Pipes, the founder of a short

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Text - I purposely mispronounce words like faux and tsunami. I just get glares as she knows I do it on purpose lol dramaro My hubby is a big car enthusiast, specifically Subarus. He does the "Subie Wave" anytime he meets another modified Subaru going down the road. I swear up and down that I've never seen anyone return the wave and that I don't believe it is actually a thing. O purpledefendorprincess s thewillowtree3 My girlfriend is still adamant that haggis don't exist. When she comes to visit

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Text - Every time there's a love or sex scene on TV and my wife is in the room, l'll pick one of the kids and say, "That's how you were born." I've also used it during weird scenes, like with the facehuggers in aliens and when Quato first appears in Total Recall. Drives them all crazy. O mikeoliveri S saturdayboy

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Text - I tell long elaborate stories with absolute convictions but it's just a convoluted setup to a pun. My wife doesn't believe anything I'm saying anymore until l'm done and she can confirm there was no pun. Also l'll make statements about myself that are completely impossible and get offended that she didn't know. Like she'll say "Oh, let me pop that pimple" and l'll go "Why would you say that!? You know I don't have skin!" PRESS START kneghx S turnoffthestars

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Text - My kids and I pretend to fall fast asleep as soon as my husband walks into the room we're in. I mean, awful fake snoring, muffled giggles. Just horrible acting really. And he always pretends we've died a horrific carbon monoxide induced death. werekeepinittogether 3 yespumpkindoodlesthings

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Tagged: twitter , marriage , relatable , relationships , social media , ridiculous , funny , dating

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Landlord Won't Pay For Electricity During Winter, Nuclear Revenge Ensues

It's entitled human beings like this that give the rest of the world's hard working landlords a bad rap. This landlord was pulling all kinds of criminal stunts. Not only that, but he refused to pay for the building's electricity during the icy heart of winter. That's just wrong, man. Fortunately, there was a moral enforcer around who was ready to do the research necessary to take this landlord down. By the end of it, the dude ended up owing thousands, and it sounds like that was completely justified.

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Text - r/NuclearRevenge + Join u/TheAsianSquad • 1y 1 3 1 Take away our heat and electricity during the winter? Enjoy losing your job and paying thousands. (Repost) NOTE:This post is owned by u/lillesdaddy TL;DR at bottom I regretfully got an apartment with what is in my opinion the worst landlord ever. This man, I will call entitled dick or ED, has the audacity to call himself a good person in court. Let me fill you in. I got an apartment shortly after being released from prison. Happy that som

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Text - All was well for the first few months, then winter hit and the heat went out. It took three days to get ED to even answer his phone. By that time his voicemail was full of complaints from his freezing cold tenants. He told me the law gave him reasonable time to fix it. We went two more weeks with no heat using our stoves and camping in the kitchen in our respective apartments. When ED got his electricity bill he attempted to raise the rent on the apartments. Obviously he was not allowed b

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Text - This is where my OCD kicked in and I went full research mode. I studied every law in regards to federal, state and city landlord tenant laws and rights. I found so many violations it was no longer funny but scary. I studied building code, I studied the condition of all of his apartments. This was easier due to the fact I was either friends with his tenants or had gone there to repair damages caused by frozen pipes and electrical outlets failing due to shoddy wiring and so forth. ED had pi

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Text - But ED had his own plan. January 2nd at two AM I was awoken by the smoke detectors in the whole building going off. I quickly ran to the back hall because no smoke was in my apartment yet but I was on the top floor. I opened the door and was greeted by a thick wall of smoke. I quickly ran downstairs after shouting for my GF at the time to get out of the house quick. I pounded on every door and screamed fire. I got as many people as possible to evacuate but the floor with the fire no one w

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Text - Two weeks later the results were released. ARSON! The tenant had used hairspray to start the fire and hid the evidence in a hole she punched into the wall. The very person who had been given money by the landlord. Ironically she was the only tenant who had paid rent in the whole building because she had started moving in two days prior. I had not known she was now a tenant and her sister and kids had moved out the day before. I looked at ED and told him "I know what he had done" and I was

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Text - I formulated a new plan. I sucked up to him and made it known I am a computer tech. ED had a few broken computers and some printer and network issues. I was in. We worked a deal on payment for back rent. I knew he was not good for his word but it was all part of the plan. Once I got his passwords and logins I copied his entire HDD to my portable one. I copied all emails in his business account and printed his financial records on my wifi printer which was next door. After I "fixed" his co

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Text - I contacted code enforcement with all of the violations of code for every building including the illegal electrical installation in his new office without permits or even an electrician. He was immediately investigated. That night I found a seven day notice to quit on my door. My roommate was worried but I filled him in on the plan. Remember I studied all those laws and rights? Well, we get to court and I open with your honor I have proof of a clear violation of the warranty of habitbalit

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Text - The next month I was given another eviction notice. Still he is losing money due to the fact I was teaching his tenants landlord tenant rights and the laws associated with it. ED kept losing his court dates and kept being told to fix stuff and was continuously fined by the courts and the code enforcement. He was sinking fast. Back to that fire, the woman living there was arrested for arson and charged with two counts due to the "accidental" electrical fire on New years day turned out to b

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Text - Needless to say spending the winter without heat took a toll on us tenants. We bought electric heaters and informed the power company that the landlord had shut off all the power to all his building and was requiring the tenants to pay for their own power. Well apparently his illegal wiring caught up to him. He had wired apartments to run off each other and the common areas were now attached to wiring in every apartment. This put ED in a rough position as local law says it's the landlords

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Text - ED was panicking. He kept losing in court, people were legally withholding rent, he couldn't shut off services, and the fines were debilitating. He kept blaming his tenants and refused to repair things. One by one the buildings were condemned and ED was required to pay for relocation of his tenants by law. Well he didn't. He couldn't! He was arrested for attempting to sell three buildings the city confiscated from him and for selling one that was condemned. ED got what he deserved. He los

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Text - I have since gotten a new apartment and everything he owned has been taken by the city, state, and IRS. I have not seen ED in three years and all of his properties have been bought by someone new, repaired, and have all new tenants who are happy with their new landlords. The old tenants got better places with decent landlords. And what about our wonderful entitled dick? He is serving multiple sentences for the crimes he has committed and is already not getting out anytime soon yet the inv

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Tagged: landlord , satisfying , revenge , winter , Reddit , illegal , karma , apartment , wtf

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Stellar Manager Handles Layoff Like a Boss

So many people have been absolutely burned by layoffs in the past that seeing a story like this is a rare and welcome diamond in the rough. This person acted with the kind of understanding and responsibility that a cool manager should. For another story of a boss actually being great, here's a story of a VP who pulled rank and got canned by a cool CEO.

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Boss has to layoff staff, gets them rehired - Text - Posted by u/dogredsox 1 year ago What's the best job quitting story you can tell? 96% Upvoted

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Boss has to layoff staff, gets them rehired - Text - shortadamlewis 13.3k points · 1 year ago 4 3 8 O I had to lay off my entire staff (and myself) with 8 hours notice. I was the contract project manager on a government project (office type work). At our periodic review on a Thursday, the government announced they would not be renewing our contract and our last day was Friday (the next day).

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Boss has to layoff staff, gets them rehired - Text - I brought everyone into the conference room first thing the next day, let everyone know that we were all out of a job and that today was everyone's last day. I had everyone email me their resumes, and we went over everyone's on the conference room projector and updated them over the course of the day. I then printed out "reference" sheets for everyone, and we all spent the remainder of the day writing letters of recommendation for each other.

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Boss has to layoff staff, gets them rehired - Text - LukeTheApostate 5.2k points ·1 year ago You, individually and as a group, are exceptionally good people.

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Boss has to layoff staff, gets them rehired - Text - [deleted] 553 points · 1 year ago This reminds me of my favorite superintendent at my last job. We were downsizing and cut down 2 crews unexpectedly. The call had come from the highest up. We had not expected this and had just told them they were safe. The superintendent lays them off and tells them they all have jobs and to walk into another companies office on Monday. He then put in his two weeks citing that upper management had over stepped

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Tagged: wholesome , boss , fired , job , work , nice , story

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Tumblr Thread: Werewolves Would Be Ultra-Competitive Neighbors

Tumblr has its fair share of avoidable werewolf fiction, but very little of it has to do with how hard it would be to keep up with a werewolf PTA mom. The bake sales would be absolutely brutal. For other tumblr things of the sort, here's a blessed tumblr post on wolves and a funny tumblr foray into the Addams Family.

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Text - s thewritehag Let Me Talk About Werewolves for a Second marzo2theletter Why is it that every werewolf book is this weird testosterone fueled alpha male/female romance thing? Like guys. Werewolves are family groups. They are basically big ol' dog families. Your werewolf family wouldn't be made up of alpha males fighting each other for dominance and subjugating females. If there was a werewolf in your neighborhood, they'd be that family of 10 kids always roughhousing outside and their house

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Text - boss comes out in other ways, resulting in the two clans getting, like, weirdly competitive about everything. Imagine the Hallowe'en displays. severalowls Are you trying to tell me that the most hardcore ride-or-die PTA mothers are probably actually werewolves? therobotmonster "We're settling this through the old ways, Helen." "Spiked silver chains on the night of the blood moon?" "The spring bake sale, Helen. Turn it down a notch." "Fine. But when they taste my lemon squares you're going

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Text - Meanwhile, across the room. "You know what I like doin' Rob?" "What's that Bill?" "Peeing out of doors." "Me too, Bill. But I thought you just married into the whole werewolf thing." "I'm just making conversation, Rob." cheeseanonioncrisps I like it. The house inbetween their two houses is owned by a vampire family who deliberately fuel the fire because they like to watch the drama. (What? Just because you're not allowed to kill werewolves anymore, doesn't mean you can't have fun with the

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Text - "Oh, hi Helen. Putting up the Christmas decorations, I see?" "Yep, this light show'll make this our best Christmas display yet." "Oh great! You know the Johnsons have got lifesize singing reindeer as part of their display." Helen's perfectly manicured nails grow another two centimetres. "Oh they have, have they? Oh is that the time! I'm sorry Lilith, I've just got to go and pick something up from the shops." She returns three hours later with Six reindeer and a giant inflatable Father Chr

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Text - selenekallanwriter Across from the vampires lives a family of Fae. True to their nature, they turn up their noses at the garish decorations and the childish behavior of the werewolf families, while secretly the betting with the vampires on who will show the claws first: Jessi or Helen. Source: martxoa 63,155 notes

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Tagged: tumblr , werewolf , lol , fiction , funny tumblr , Supernatural

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Tumblr Thread: Cooks Bond Over Dysfunctional Family Members

Man, without fail the wandering minds of Tumblr always seem to deliver gems when we need them most. This particular time we've got some cooks bonding over their nasty, dysfunctional family members, and ultimately uniting to bring us all some sweet recipes from their respective homes. Really might have to get down with that meatloaf as soon as possible.

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Text - @ schizophrenicarchivist-remade-d When I was little my mom's meatloaf was my favorite food. But ONLY her meatloaf. I didn't like anyone else's, and she told me that she would teach me how to make it when I was older. And when I was like 19? She finally taught me, but she told me never to tell anyone else and I was like weird but okay Anyway, she was super fucking homophobic and abusive to me when I told her I was gay, so here's the recipe 4-6 Ibs of Hamburger/turkey burger 1 pk onion soup

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Text - You can get almost all of these ingredients at the dollar store, and have leftovers if it's just you. The leftovers make great tacos if (taco seasoning is also like a dollar). Enjoy your revenge loaf O comfynb Follow here's a mashed potato recipe from my homophobic mother that i swore to never share that would pair perfectly! (6 servings) -2lbs red potatoes -1 cup butter (2 sticks) -1 cup cream cheese (1 pack) -Chives (optional) -Salt & Pepper to taste 1. drop those bad boys (potatoes) in

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Text - 3. Drain 4. Mash (usually they're small enough you can use a fork if u don't have one of those squashers) until its a pretty chunky mix 5. add the other stuff. Keep mashing I like my mashed potato consistancy more lumpy but its all up to you!! Peel the potatoes or keep them on, it literally makes the creamiest fluffiest mashed potatoes which she always served with the nastiest fuckin meatloaf lovelyladylavie Follow Now if anybody got some revenge rolls and revenge green bean casserole we'

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Text - A kreature-ofthenight Follow Got room for desert? Cus my Grandma was just a generaly evil old hag who was abusive to my mum and my siblings also you guessed it since I came out I was not said hello to at christmas She made pretty god Dampfnudeln (its like a sweet bread rool you eat hot and with vanilla sauce) 1. Put 300 gram flour into a bowl and make an indent in the middle 2.combine 20 gram yeast 1 tea sp. Brown sugar 3 tbsp milk mix until smooth 3.mix into part of the flour but leave a

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Text - 5. add 1/8 liter luke warm milk 30 gram Sugar one pack of vanilla sugar a pinch of salt 2 eggs and knead the dough until smooth 6. put 1/8 luke warm milk 30 gram of Butter 1 pack of vanilla sugar into a heat resistant glass bowl and let melt (the glass bowl is quite important) 7. Form about 12 dough rolls and put them into the milk

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Text - 8. Cover with a lid (any lid will go it does not need to be sealed air tight) Let bake in the pre heated oven at 200°C for about 30 minutes or until they start to get brown and fluffy 9. Serve with vanilla sauce or fresh fruit clover11-10 Follow Behold the Fuck You buffet maximumninjavoid Follow Reblogging because revenge IS tasty angryschnauzer Follow And in this case, served hot. #fuck the idea of hoarding recipes #and fuck these abusive homophobes 204,714 notes

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Tagged: FAIL , cooking , tumblr , cringe , ridiculous , family , funny tumblr

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Incompetent Manager Fires Only OSHA Certified Employee, It Backfires

This company clearly made a big mistake when they fired their only OSHA certified forklift operator. Fortunately, the forklift operator was able to maintain enough presence in the face of that unfortunate development, and ultimately report them, and get them fined to oblivion. Sounds like the incompetent company man decided to quit when it was all said and done. There are some people that you just don't go after. Good for this dude.

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Text - r/ProRevenge + Join u/BeagleonBass • 18h 1 16 2 7 @ 10 3 8 6. Fired from last job, but I got the last laugh. Pardon the format, I am on mobile. I worked at a retail chain that sold pet supplies and products. When I started working there it was great, family owned and everyone I worked with was fantastic. The owners eventually wanted to retire and sold the small chain to an investment group. Once the investment group took over, almost all but a few employees were let go, forced out or just

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Text - New company brings in new manager to my store. My store was the top performing store in the entire chain, bringing in about $10,000-12,000/day on average. It was always more on weekends and especially around the holidays. The new manager is a Mr Company man, company told him they only want employees around for 2-3 years, myself and two others had been there 10+ years. So naturally he began ruffling feathers and giving us all a hard time. Unfortunately he decided on me first. Mr Company ma

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Text - hear that, and told me I either had to work nights and weekends, or that day would be my last day. I told him, "Don't threaten me with a good time, I suppose today is my last day then." I was pretty pissed about that, but it's not a big deal now, ended up being the greatest thing that ever happened to me. I went home early, didn't finish my shift, because fuck em. But when I got home I decided to call my local OSHA inspector and report them for not having a certified operator on staff, as

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Tagged: employee , satisfying , job , revenge , ridiculous , Reddit , company

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Funniest Things People Caught Themselves Mindlessly Doing

Most of us have caught ourselves in the middle of a completely nonsensical act where we basically just wake up, and realize we have no idea what we're doing. It's as if some other completely aloof force possesses the body for a hot minute, and makes it do all kinds of dumb stuff. As long as you can maintain a sense of humility, and the mindless action didn't put you in harms way, it's actually a great chance to laugh at yourself.

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Text - imvegeta_ble • 6d S 1 Award One day when I was about 10 or something, I started subconsciously undoing my shirt in the classroom. While the teacher was teaching. I don't know why and thankfully no one notice but 20 years later even today I remember and think why would that happen? Reply 1 1.9k 3 ...

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Text - Lizzymorales • 6d 38 Awards Blew on ice cream I was eating because I was watching a cooking show where they were making soup. QReply 1 16.3k 3 ...

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Text - angelavila111 • 6d 3 1 Award Apparently i have this habit when cooking, that whenever i get a spoon and taste the food, i stand there lost in thought for a solid 5 minutes without interruption. The only reason i noticed was because a roommate thought i was just fucking with him and called me out on it [+ Q Reply 1.9k ...

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Text - jhalldor • 6d 2 3 87 Awards Driving. I'll be driving home from work and then suddenly realize I was on auto-pilot and am now half way home. Did I run every light? Who knows Q Reply 15.1k ...

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Text - ionevenobro •6d 2 Awards I was like 12, was about to eat leftovers for breakfast cause l'm a monster. I sat down with this plate o'food and then just poured milk aaallIl over it. Realized after the second glug of milk that I've made a mistake. Grandpa (RIP) was looking at his disappointment of a grandson but had a grin instead of the usual look of disappointment. Reply 1 1.1k 3 ...

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Text - GrillMaster3 •6d 3 E 2 Awards Woke up halfway through a nap to realize l'd fallen asleep face down on the carpet. No idea why I decided that was a good place to nap. Q Reply 1 5.3k 3 •..

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Text - buttrammer6969 •6d 3 Awards My goldfish looked hungry and so I got the cat food out and almost poured it into the tank Reply 4.5k ...

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Text - 247-sylviaplath • 6d Mouthing the answers to hypothetical interviews about the thing l'm doing at the time. Q Reply 1 1.8k 3 ...

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Text - YaBoyRob1 • 6d S 8 5 Awards I leave my phone in the fridge more often than l'd like to admit Reply 1 6.9k 3 ...

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Text - funkytown67_rh • 6d 2 3 2 Awards I will just randomly bite my arm and hold the position until I notice. Just like... Why?

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Text - Corgi_with_stilts • 6d e 8 5 Awards Having a silent conversation with someone who is not there. Reply 5.6k ...

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Text - windsaidtotherain • 6d 3 3 2 Awards Started brushing my teeth one morning, getting ready for work, and half way through wondered why there were so many bubbles overflowing out of my mouth, and why it didn't taste minty. Realized I used face wash on my toothbrush instead of toothpaste. Surprisingly, it did a good job. Reply 2.4k •..

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Text - Martin_RB • 6d 8 4 Awards Reaching home and laying down still dressed then waking up a couple hours later thinking it's early morning and I just got dressed so I get my stuff and start to leave home. Happened to me at least one a week for a couple months. Reply 1 7.7k 3 ...

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Text - CrazyPlato • 6d 3 3 Awards Planning a massive lecture on a topic I was fired up about. As if I was about to walk into a college class I was teaching. This has happened multiple times.

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Text - thatonelurkerr • 6d 3 1 Award Pacing around my house for long periods of tiem listening to music, talking to myself, and imagining myself in a music video dancing and singing to the song Q Reply 1 2.0k 3 ...

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Text - abspencer22 • 6d 3 Awards I pace through my entire house when I'm on the phone. In and out of every room in a pattern and I have no idea I'm doing it until it gets pointed out Q Reply 1 7.6k

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Text - TyNyeTheTransGuy • 6d 8 3 Awards Accidentally saying my thoughts out loud. I'll be lying in bed and just go "why the fuck did I do that?" Or "what an idiot" or whatever inner commentary I have going on. Reply 1 2.9k 3 •..

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Text - UncharteredComic • 6d Put on an accent while l'm studying and pretend like I'm a foreign professor explaining the work to students. O + Q Reply 744 ...

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Text - hawk0_tac0 • 6d 3 1 Award I make random sounds while I day dream. Reply 1 872

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Text - bransonnnn • 6d 1 Award Doing impressions around the house. "Meesa called Jar Jar Binks. Meesa your humble serrrrvant." I dont even like Jar Jar. Reply 1.0k ...

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Text - SassySavcy • 6d Was watching TV and decided to heat up some leftover pizza. Took it out of the fridge, put it on a plate, placed it in the freezer, went and sat back down, realized I am an idiot. Reply 137 5 ...

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Black-and-white - MR_System_ • 6d 2 Awards I interviewed my soap bottle.

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Text - cat9tail • 6d Working from home now, so I make my own coffee - typically while I'm also reading morning emails & listening to Alexa read off my schedule. Several times I've mindlessly started to put the hot coffee carafe in the refrigerator after pouring myself a mug, and then realize my brain actually wanted to get the creamer out of the fridge. Thankfully I haven't shattered the cold glass shelves with hot coffee yet, but l've come close twice. Reply 4 260 ...

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Text - CaedustheBaedus • 6d Poured my coffee in my cereal instead of the milk. Was completely zoned out. Coffee soaked cheerios do not taste good. Reply 1 983 ...

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Text - true_majik • 6d Driving on the busy freeway and suddenly realizing I do not recall the last several miles. As in....how the hell did I get to this point of my drive?!?!! Reply 1 223 3 ...

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Tagged: brain fart , askreddit , ridiculous , autopilot , Reddit , funny

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Moments that Confirm That Kids Are Weird and Dumb

It's not a question that kids are weird and dumb. They'll take multiple bites of fake fruit, lie about objective facts, and cover themselves in house paint for no reason. Everyone knows a few moments that prove the weird dumbness of children, especially when it comes to the stupid things they remember themselves doing.

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Text - Bobby Schroeder @ponettplus 000 apparently my nine-year-old nephew wanted permission to make a facebook account and my sister was like "no, you're nine" and then he figured out how to make one behind her back and got caught immediately when he sent her a friend request

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Text - My niece done told her school we put weed in her food at home that's why she be sleepy YALL ITS PARSLEY My sister going to jail

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Text - joe heenan @joeheenan There was a massive unflushed Jobby in the toilet. I asked my boys who did it & my 10yr old son said it was him. My 5yr old son is crying cause he says it was him & his big brother is taking the credit. Have a great week everyone!

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Text - Brian Wecht O @bwecht Audrey (6yo): Daddy! Did you know that after Michael left my school, he came back and now people call him David? Me: Does he look and sound totally different too? Audrey: Yes!!! Me: That's not the same kid, honey. Audrey: *long pause* Maybe 3:51 PM 11/6/20 · Twitter for iPhone

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Roof - Where in the dad manual did it mention how to stop a 3 year old from taking bites out of fucking dry wall?

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Text - ... 2 hrs • O My son just came up to me with a bag of chips and said "Daddy, I can't eat this. The bag is broken" pointing to the open end of the bag. Me, thinking he was just being a 5 year old and making a big deal out of some minor grievance: "There's nothing wrong with it, just eat the chips." Son: "I can't, the bags broken!" Me: "What does that have to do with the chips?" Son: "No, I can't eat it because there's a hole in the bag." Me: "Yeah, that's how you open it. Here, give me the

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Text - ... Remembering when I was 7 and found out that showers instead of baths saved water, so then filled the bath up with the shower head to save my parents money Imaoooo 43 3 comments O Like Comment Share

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Text - TRAINER Bill Draw 2 cards. (P.lacky, Blus. Ken Sugimori 01995, 96, 96 Nintendo, Creatures GAMEFREAK O1999 Wizards 91/102

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Photograph - GREEN OROUP waht "when I grow up I want to be a dog"

10. "Rocket ships"

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Text - Alex Faulk @Luz_235 When I was ~6 I learned how to open the child safety latch on the cabinet where my parents kept all the cleaning supplies after a long time of trying to figure out how it worked. Luckily for me I was too excited opening and closing the cabinet repeatedly to poison myself.

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Text - : Anonymous 06/23/18(Sat)19:13:48 No.772383429 >be 9 >playing Paper Mario >halfway through game get to part where you have to buy a quest item from a store >shop owner (toad) says item is out of stock and will be in stock soon 309 KB PNG >assume it means I have to actually WAIT for it >spend 3 IRL months checking in the game to see if the item has come in stock yet >8 years later watching a speedrun of the game >realize you didn't have to fucking wait for it, you just had to fucking conti

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Drink - C Jess 2h •O Good evening who needs a free happy meal? We have 18 available. My 5 year old knows how to grubhub. livery MeDela Aatlivery McDelivery V002

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Photography - pineapplefiendwillriseagain: This is my little baby cousin and he is dressed as a smoke detector for Halloween None of us know why but he is really obsessed with smoke detectors That's all he's asked for in the way of presents these past two years He calls them "snoke edectors" Also he has a scrapbook of everyone in the family posing with their smoke detectors

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Text - Truth teller This reminds me of when I took my young daughters to the Ohio River to watch submarine races. OK, it's easy to fool kids, but fun. 3 years ago 12K 1 50 SHOW MORE REPLIES

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Text - Britt | Resume Writer & Career Enha... @bossy_britt My son kept saying he wanted "brownies" so I baked brownies and was still crying saying "no I want the white brownies" Thad to call my husband and ask what he meant. Whole time he meant "hashbrowns"

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People - He really sitting here watching the TV like he ain't just use the whole thing of Vaseline in his head man 144

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Text - My almost 3 yr old daughter found our Ouija board and has been using it to practice her ABCS and Numbers. ES OUIJA NO ORSTUVWA 1234567890 GOOD BY

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Text - 纪 family had super powers a cud fly mum could go invisible , told her that hers wis dain big farts n she's devastated Just watched the incredibles n told her our MORE DFT 1DEAS ONLINE ANDD

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Text - I may have done a lot of embarrassing things in my life, but my older sister actually once found a cabbage patch kids birth certificate in my moms filing cabinet, started screaming at and accusing our mom of hiding our "brother" Clyde Fabian from us, and she was like 15 9:35 PM 11/30/20 · Twitter for iPhone 79 Retweets 11 Quote Tweets 1,173 Likes

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Tagged: kids , childhood , absurd , strange , lol , ridiculous , dumb , idiots , stories , weird , stupid , children

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Long View of Space X "Landing" Is Sci-fi-ish

They say you can't get to Mars without breaking a few eggs. While the most recent SpaceX Starship attempt didn't exactly have a perfect landing, watching the thing from far away lets you see exactly how it straight up looks like a sideways building falling to the earth before very nearly re-righting itself and (almost) sticking the landing.

Submitted by: (via Corey Lambrecht)

Tagged: spacex , wtf , rocket , elon musk , spaceship , science , space

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Co-Worker Scams Free Lunches Out Of People, Gets Called Out

Mooches are the worst. They plead and they whine and they often try to take advantage of other people's kindness. Then when they get caught up in their cheap little scams they cry out from their pity trains, and try to make the people that originally helped them out, to be the ones that are in the wrong. It's ridiculous, and a poor reflection of humanity. This particular choosing beggar co-worker got called out, and honestly it seems like it was a long time coming.

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Text - 12 5 e 6 S 15 5 AITA for refusing to buy a coworker lunch Not the A-hole | (23M) have a coworker (25M) who is a mooch. If you get something for lunch, he wants you to get him something too, but expects you to buy it for him because since you mentioned it, he says you offered. At first I thought maybe he had money problem, but then overheard him laughing and bragging to someone in another department about how he was able to scam lunches out of his coworkers, and he's attempted to bully a f

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Text - So yesterday my girlfriend and I had lunch together. He overheard me confirming before I left and asked what I was bringing him and I said nothing. He said I brought it up, and I corrected him. No, I was confirming we were still good and he was eavesdropping on my conversation. He started complaining so I had if he gave me money for his food l'd bring him something but I wasn't going to buy him food. He started complaining about it again and I got irritated and said no money no food, and

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Text - When I got back my boss said my coworker complained I was being hostile. I told him what happened and how he's constantly trying to weasel free food out of people, even some of the people he knows are struggling. So my boss asked around and several others collaborated what I said. My coworker got dragged into the office and now he's pissed that I "narc'd" and how he was just kidding. Most of the office thinks he got what he deserved but a few think it wasn't worth getting him in trouble o

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Text - TimeandEntropy • 23h • Colo-rectal Surgeon [32] NTA People that are "just kidding" don't complain about hostility to the boss. He's just pissed his con stopped working so no, I wouldn't worry what he thinks. It's absolutely worth getting him in trouble over when he's trying to get you in trouble. Protecting yourself from the scammer isn't an AH thing to do at all. Q Reply 1 2.7k 3 ...

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Text - LizardManelli • 23h • Asshole Enthusiast [5] a 3 4 Awards Definitely NTA. He got what was long overdue. It's not like you went out of your way to narc on him - HE is the one who narced on himself by whining to your boss about you. Had he not brought up the issue and forced you defend your actions (what did he think was going to happen? That you were just going to roll over and let your boss bollock you for no reason?!), none of this would have happened. Good on you for standing up for you

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Text - _Julanna • 23h NTA. You didn't narc...he did. So if I understand correctly, some of your office thinks that it's fine for him to try to get you in trouble, but not fine for you to defend yourself with the truth. Guess you know who to avoid going forward. # Q Reply 3.9k ...

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Text - besupergood • 23h • Partassipant [3] NTA- He literally complained to the boss because you wouldn't buy him food, trying to get you in trouble. So you explained the truth to the boss. Not sure what he thought was gonna happen there. Reply 610 3 ...

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Text - emmany63 • 23h • Partassipant [1] 1 Award NTA. Moving forward, you'll want to take a step back and continue being the professional here rather than engaging with him. As Mark Twain said, "Never argue with an idiot. They will drag you down to their level and beat you with experience." So the next time he tries to engage with you and your coworkers on this topic, simply remark, "I'm sorry you feel that way." He's a manipulative mooch, so don't give him room to maneuver, and don't give him r

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Text - [deleted] • 23h 100% NTA. He lost the ability to play the "I was just kidding" card after he A.) openly bragged about scamming his coworkers and B.) forced your hand by getting your boss involved. Q Reply 341 ...

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Text - Dauntless-One • 23h • Partassipant [3] NTA. But YWBTA if you ever buy him a free lunch again. Honestly, you and everyone else he's taken advantage of should start asking HIM to bring them food whenever he's having lunch if he persists with this and doesn't stop. Then, when he says no/gets defensive, just tell him "well I bought you food and you never paid me, so protocol is that you have to buy me lunch - so where's my food?" Reply 1 257 3 ...

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Text - Aggravating_Offer129 · 23h • Partassipant [3] NTA. It doesn't sound like he's actually friends with anyone in your workplace and is just extorting food from everyone. He likely expected you to back off because he chose to complain. But good for you for choosing to stand up for yourself and others! O Q Reply 4 63 ...

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Text - kekejaja • 23h NTA, it was he who involved the boss not you. This guy should be embarrassed. Reply 141 3 ...

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Text - dricysarcasm • 23h • Asshole Enthusiast [9] NTA. He's the one who started it by trying to get you in trouble for being "hostile" because you told him no. He got what he deserved. OQ Reply 48 3 ...

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Text - Sabaroo • 23h NTA. He went and complained first, got it turned on him cos he didn't really think that far ahead. Got what he deserved and well done for not caving. O Reply 15 + ...

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Text - aSeaPersonByNight • 23h • Partassipant [2] NTA. He's not entitled to your money, and omg how was he raised?! My mother would straight up squash me like a bug if I had dared to presume to invite myself - for free! - to someone else's lunch! He's learning that actions have consequences. Act like a weasel, be treated like a weasel. Reply 4 31 3 ...

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Text - FesteringNoseOlives • 23h • Partassipant [1] NTA "You won't do what I want I'm going to get you in trouble!" "What, you told the truth and now l'm in trouble?! But I was just kidding!" Reply 1 32 ...

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Text - Maestro_Primus • 23h • Certified Proctologist [26] NTA The guy was an asshole, then he went to the boss when you refused to be bullied. When the boss did due diligence, the asshole was found. Reply 15 3 ...

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Text - Allisonb93 · 23h NTA and what a pathetic individual. Reply ...

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Text - BrokeTomcat• 23h NTA - if he keeps this up and making these false accusations of alienation/exclusion then l'd suggest going to the HR department. Reply ...

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Text - singer96 • 22h NTA, he is at fault here not u, he was scamming ppl and got caught for it, that's on him not u. You were just clever enough to put your foot down Reply 3 ...

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Tagged: employee , FAIL , coworkers , ridiculous , mooch , Reddit , cheap , dramatic

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History Memes for the Knowledge Seekers

Having a deeper knowledge of history than the average person won't necessarily make you smarter or more successful in life than anyone else, but it will enrich your ability to understand some pretty kickass history memes. History memes are technically educational and boy do they go down smooth.