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2021/01/02

Choosing Beggar Wants Friend's Car For Date, Gets Rejected, Questions Friendship and more...

Ah, the good old choosing beggar strikes again with another ridiculous case of entitlement. This guy's biggest mistake was assuming that the car was going to be the dealbreaker when it came to getting lucky on his date. Naturally, that kind of twisted ...

 

Choosing Beggar Wants Friend's Car For Date, Gets Rejected, Questions Friendship and more...


 In This Issue...



Choosing Beggar Wants Friend's Car For Date, Gets Rejected, Questions Friendship

Ah, the good old choosing beggar strikes again with another ridiculous case of entitlement. This guy's biggest mistake was assuming that the car was going to be the dealbreaker when it came to getting lucky on his date. Naturally, that kind of twisted thinking resulted in one ridiculous and avoidable angry back-and-forth between friends, regarding being able to borrow a car. Hopefully they're able to salvage their friendship. 

1.

Text - Today 2:34 PM Hey bro, is it cool if I still borrow the whip tonight? Yeah man just bring it back by 10 What time you swinging thru Aight homie. See you then Today 4:06 PM

2.

Text - I'm going to give you the whip back tomorrow morning instead. Naw dude I need my car tonight Why you need it overnight? You have your own car Emily wants to get drinks in the Southside tonight after our

3.

Text - date, and I'm not going to get laid if she knows what kind of car l'm pushing. Doubt she'll care what car you drive. Be more worried about how your crib looks Imao Plus I don't want my whip parked on East Carson... too many drunks and don't wanna worry bout it getting hit or side swiped

4.

Text - Dude, don't be a fucking asshole. You know l've been trying to hit that since college. Are you really going to do this to me? Do what to you? I just bought the Charger and not gonna take any chances of you driving it drunk or it getting vandalized or hit in SS You know I been grinding to get it for the past few years It's a fucking car, bro. Do you not value our friendship over a stupid whip? Weird cause I was gonna ask you the same

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Tumblr Users Trade Unconfirmed Facts About Soda And Carrier Pigeons

Nothing fills our hearts with joy and appreciation like a couple Tumblr users swapping knowledge about the history of soda and carrier pigeons in a totally random Tumblr thread. But hey, that's what Tumblr is all about. Can't say that we knew that drinking Pepsi cold and Coke warm would result in them tasting the same. Is that real life? 

1.

Text - narwhalsarefalling fun fact im weirdly knowlagable in the history of soda i dont even drink soda why do i know so much about it narwhalsarefalling coke and pepsi taste different because coke was invent before refrigeration so it was designed to be drunk warm, while pepsi was designed after refrigeration was invented so it was designed to be drunk cold. as a result the tastes are different but if you drink pepsi cold and coke warm theyll taste the same.

2.

Text - lam-baka Why the fuck do you know this narwhalsarefalling i honestly have no idea coke's recipe was originally green but the designers made it brown so it looked more like tea squirrelstone Had they never seen green tea?

3.

Text - narwhalsarefalling i dont even know if green tea was invented in 1886 but they wanted to make the public more open to eating the fizzy drink transcoranic Green tea was invented in the 13th century and made up 22% of the tea thrown off the ship in the Boston Tea Party narwhalsarefalling alan i know about soda not green tea

4.

Text - cheap-pink-mints i will trade u information abt bees and carrier pigeons for information abt the history of soda narwhalsarefalling no one knows where the origin of the name 7up' started but it did have a mood stabilizer in the original recipe found in present day anti-depressants i want facts about bees and carrier pigeons now

5.

Text - cheap-pink-mints Carrier pigeons come from a species of Wild Rock pigeon, and their flights could be as long as 1800 km and were used as early as 3000 years ago. You know in old cartoons where a character throws a beehive at someone, and you think 'lol, but that wouldn't work in real life'. Turns out it would, and did. People used to lob beehives at the approximate location of the enemy forces to expose them. narwhalsarefalling this is amazing thank you Source: narwhalsarefalling 130 699

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Landlord Tries To Scam Tenants For $80, Ends Up Paying $6K

This landlord thought they'd simply scam another few tenants with a BS "cleaning fee." Fortunately, these tenants decided to fight back with a smart and effective revenge. You better believe that the landlord is kicking himself now, to the tune of $6,000. Ouch, but definitely deserved. 

1.

Text - r/ProRevenge + JOIN u/UnderwhelmingTwin • 2d Scam me for $80 for "cleaning" on move out? I don't think so, Jack. TLDR at bottom. Background:

2.

Text - About 10 years ago my landlord died. Or at least the person who owned the place we were renting. The property managers had been delightful, but whoever inherited wanted to sell, so the house was for sale. Enter a jackass--we'll call him Jack--who decides to buy the place. Now ours was the top floor (ie: attic converted into a suite) of a house, less than 35sq meters (375sq feet). The bathroom was literally where the stairs up to the top floor used to be. The place was tiny.

3.

Text - Jack came to check out the place, as you should before buying a place. He had one of those blue- tooth earpieces in and I can't even remember if he even acknowledged us. He spent about 30-45 seconds in our suite. Next time we hear from him is about a month later, apparently he'd bought the place. He stops by to give us a notice of rent increase, effective in 6 months (legal minimum). From $485 to $795. The place is not worth that much.

4.

Text - We say nuts to that and decide to buy a house, since WTH it's not much more per month (surprise to anyone who's never bought a house: it _was_ more than just mortgage payments). We give him all the required notice to move out. We move, and clean the place up really well. Mind you, when my partner moved in it was not especially clean (and we happen to have the move in inspection which mentions this). Jack decides to try to scam us for $80 of our damage deposit for 'cleaning.' He doesn't pr

5.

Text - Jack (assuming we need the cash for our next damage deposit or bills and will settle for anything): Take this or l'm going to keep your whole deposit. Cue Revenge: So he decides to just keep the whole deposit ($485).

6.

Text - I file paperwork with the rentalsman: who unsurprisingly, after their investigation, rule in my favour. He's ordered to refund the whole deposit. But Jack decides, not to pay. And the rentalsman doesn't have any enforcement powers. So I have to go to the local sheriffs office. They can send a legal demand letter for the deposit + costs. But it will cost me $100-150 (I forget) up front. Sure go ahead. Jack decides to ignore the sheriff's kindly letter. Sheriffs say that they can start proc

7.

Text - I guess most people quit at this point. Being out of pocket -$700, throwing more money at the problem and maybe having to wait months didn't appeal to them. And there's also a chance you never collect. I chose to pay the sheriffs. They sent another, less friendly letter to Jack. But here's the best part: now that they're recovering a debt, they're going to recover on ALL of the outstanding judgements against him. And apparently he has tried this shit before.

8.

Text - They send him another couple letters: pay up or else. Jack chose else. Then they seize title to Jack's giant white SUV (I can't remember what it was, but not a cheap one). They didn't physically take it away or anything, but they gave him 30 days to pay all the judgements against him or they would take it and sell it at auction.

9.

Text - Somehow he all of a sudden found the money. My share: $485+$150+$250=$885. The other people who'd registered judgements, but not paid to start the collections processes were about $5,000 more. I can't remember how long the whole process took, at least 6 months though. TLDR: Landlord tries to scam us for $80 for 'cleaning' when we move out. Ends up costing him almost $6,000.

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Guy Gets Scammed For $600 Over Xbox, Humiliates Scammer

Don't go messing with Norwegians and their code of honor. Also, just don't be a scummy scammer like this dude. Apparently the scammer played the guy trying to buy an Xbox One for $600. Not cool! Fortunately, the revenge was successful and the scammer learned their lesson. 

1.

Text - You scammed me of $600 for an xbox with games that never showed up? Let's humiliate you for your entire family and close friends to see. About 3 months ago I was buying an xbox one x with like 10 games on it on Finn.no which is the Norwegian equivalent of Craigslist / Ebay. I contact the seller and ask to buy it with tracked shipping. I pay for it up front because generally honor is a pretty big thing in Norway and stealing is very frowned upon, people usually follow up on the sending wit

2.

Text - So I try to contact him and he says it's just a bit delayed. A few more weeks go by and nothing, and he stops answering my messages. I tell him about the legal stuff and he continues to ignore me. A week later I message his parents and gf on Facebook with screenshots of both the conversation and the transaction. He then messages me and says he'll send me the money when he gets paid in 2 weeks.

3.

Text - 2 weeks go by and surprise, no payment and no response to my messages. I then contact about 10 people from his Instagram with the story and screenshots and saying he's not responding to me. Im not bothered to go through the police cause that would take forever. Im relying on the honor culture that he'll be socially pressured into returning the money. He says he needs another 2 weeks to pay me back. I check his Facebook again and see that he just bought a brand new mountain bike for around

4.

Text - A woman responds saying she'd ask him about it via text. He says to her that he never got the money, so I sent a screen cap of the transaction and him saying he received the money and sent the package, so her and I caught him in a lie. He then responds to my original texts saying that he was gonna pay me back, but now that I have told people about it, he doesn't want to. And he says it's illegal for me to message his friends and takes the moral high road after scamming me for $600(fuck th

5.

Text - He stops responding to me again, so now I message 30 people via his Facebook and Instagram to his family and friends. I get a lot of responses and a lot of people taking my side of this. He must've gotten bombarded with questions and messages, as he messages me an hour later saying he'll pay me back, just get the messages to stop. 2 days later I finally get my money back a few months after the scam. TL;DR: guy tried to scam me for $600, I tell all of his close family and friends, he loses

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World Record Dive POV is Nope-City

 

Gotta hand it to Laso Schaller on this one. Probably the first thing one notices on viewing a fall of 58.8 meters (or about 192 feet) is how goddamn fast it goes. It's a stark reminder that gravity is your daddy and at any point you could fall off papa's lap. For another crazy POV there's this mountain biker's adrenaline-charged ride.

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Tagged: wtf , pov , record , dive , amazing , world record
       
 

The Strangest Things Coworkers Say

Twitter users are sharing the strangest things their coworkers say. It could be something as simple as an enthused "good morning" from a coworker that always seems to wake up on the right side of the bed, while you are busy cursing the daily morning grind. Or maybe, it's genuinely puzzling nonsense from clueless coworkers that has you scratching your head. Some of these might ring a bell. 

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Text - Ana-Ztyllablintz07-Kerie @Crampedsultana #StrangeThingsCoworkersSay "Gary, I have a house of ill-repute on the line!" True story, that. A brothel in New York was calling in to complain about a mattress sagging. They are not intended for commercial use, folks! They wanted a supervisor after being told that.

3.

Text - ELM | Ervin Lovett Miller @ELMplan elm #StrangeThingsCoworkersSay "Please stop eating my shoes." "Did you eat my pen?" "You're so soft!" Things get a little interesting when you have an Associate Barkitect on staff.

4.

Text - HI HIDIVE @HIDIVEofficial "We can only discuss hentai during business hours." And yes, one of our coworkers actually did say that. #StrangeThingsCoworkersSay

5.

Product - Bruce Daley @brucedaley Its strange. They give the food names here at work. Yesterday I ate a sandwich from the frig called "Bill". #StrangeThingsCoworkersSay

6.

Text - David Partelow @TheDorkery #StrangeThingsCoworkersSay At the Oncology Clinic: New Person: Il've met all the doctors, but not Dr. Christine yet. Me: We don't have that doctor. NP: Yeah you do! Hear about them all the time. Dr. Ven Christine or something. Me. .That's vincristine...it's a chemo drug.

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Text - JOY Undiluted @joyundilutedmbs #StrangeThingsCoworkersSay Rayn- "Your eyes are the color of Cheetoes dipped in Salsa Verde." Josie- "Is that a compliment?" Rayn- "Yes, it's a great snack."

10.

Text - dead and betty'd @Ur_Eggcellency We were having a potluck and someone seriously said "Next time, let's do a salad theme!" #StrangeThingsCoworkersSay

11.

Text - Theresa is Dead @Theresa_is_Dead "So, washing hands isn't optional?" - Bob #StrangeThingsCoworkersSay

12.

Text - Takuma Nuva @takumalight PLOVER I Her: How are you today? Me: (thinking) Ummm . . that depends on what-- ........ Her: Oh, for crying out loud, just say "I'm doing fine" so we can move on with our lives! #StrangeThingsCoworkersSay

13.

Text - Food Processing @FoodProcessing For us, our best #StrangeThingsCoworkersSay covers a lot of ground as a food trade publication, digital marketers, and who cover sweets and baking: Hey, how are we doing on those cookie drops?

14.

Text - βεαημt @AngryPeanut4 #StrangeThingsCoworkersSay Sarcasm doesn't get you anywhere. Me: Well it got me to the Sarcasm World Champsin in '98. Coworker: Really? Me: No.

15.

Product - Apathy's the national disease with no end in sight @SethFromThe716 ASPHE Why are there no cups in the breakroom? #StrangeThingsCoworkersSay

16.

Text - ĀmYstery @VeiledHeart_ #StrangeThingsCoworkersSay Me: sorry.. I'm late.. Them: you pregnant? Congratulations! Me: .... Them:

17.

Text - matt @mrl_386 Do you want to get together after work #StrangeThingsCoworkersSay

18.

Text - Lisa Lemon @mseric21 Is that a flask in your back pocket? Cuz I wouldn't blame you with your job. #StrangeThingsCoworkersSay *It was actually just my wallet and everyone I work with gives me condolences for what I do

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Obvious Scams Americans Have Been Conditioned To Accept

Nothing quite brings the blood to a boil like learning that you've been played by some manipulative, deceptive, straight up illegal scam. Unfortunately, the reality is that we share this world with many folks that are always proactively trying to pull a fast one on unsuspecting victims. The good news though is that you can read up on a thread like this, and hopefully break free from the vicious cycle of falling for scams that Americans have been conditioned to accept. Along a similar vein check out this woman's wonderful experience with the Icelandic healthcare system

1.

Text - WaYaADisi1 • 18h Unpaid internships. It is literally wage theft. Q Reply 1.2k •..

2.

Text - deccytag • 22h Your cellphone plans. In my country I pay €20 for unlimited calls, SMS and data. I work in phone sales, whenever I speak to an American they cannot believe how cheap our plans are compared to what they pay. O Q Reply 1.9k ... +

3.

Text - imnotyourbrahh • 1d Charging $1 to add cheese Reply 1.4k ...

4.

Text - jude802 · 1d 2 Awards nobody is mentioning the push that "college is for everyone! also you aren't able to default on your student loans so banks will give them to anyone. coincidentally, we started telling people that they should ALL go to college, no matter their situation, right after passing the bill that made student loans impossible to hide from." Reply 2.2k ...

5.

Text - johnydeformed · 1d 1 Award Tax Filing For the majority of wage earners, the IRS can easily determine how much you owe and tell you, or tell you what you're owed in a refund. It's simple. That they don't do so is only because tax preparation companies lobby lawmakers to keep the system as it is. Tax preparation companies only exist because they are legally allowed, middle men. They are slow, complicated, costly, and the opposite of free market efficiency. Reply 4.9k ...

6.

Text - BaconReceptacle • 1d 1 Award Prescription eye glasses. They should be maybe $100 tops but we pay multiple times that for them. Q Reply 1 3.8k ...

7.

Text - WatchTheBoom · 1d Politicians talk about the need for healthcare, but create legislation for healthcare insurance. Those are not the same things. In fact, the latter actually is a barrier to the former. Reply 4.3k ...

8.

Text - Pontus_Pilates • 1d S 2 Awards The idea that you need to work endless hours and never have time off. There are plenty of countries where people work reasonable hours, have five-week summer vacations and the economies don't fall apart. You are not lazy if you don't eat at your desk or while driving. Reply 3.4k ...

9.

Text - adsvx215 • 1d Diamonds. Reply 2.3k ... +B

10.

Text - Proud_Finish • 1d Wedding business. Everyone nowadays thinks their wedding has to be super grand and such. But paying +2500$ for a dress you can only wear once is super overrated in my opinion. Reply 1 2.1k 3 ...

11.

Text - bloomfaith • 20h Rent To Own products. (Rent-A-Center, Aarons, Conns, etc..) You end up paying triple or quadruple the value of the product for virtually no other benefit than you'd get if you just saved a little money and bought the product out-right. Reply 1 768 3 ...

12.

Text - BioLuminescentSpirit · 1d When a website offers you a free trial, but it still wants your credit card info. Reply 689 ...

13.

Text - Adult_Reasoning • 1d Car dealerships. They're literally just middle-man functions that do nothing more than raise the cost of the "good" and produce taxation for the government on multiple levels of the transactions involved in purchasing a car through the third party. + Q Reply 4 999 ...

14.

Text - tripster72 · 1d 2 Awards Lawmakers allowed to invest in the stock market Q Reply 1 3.2k

15.

Text - sprucetrap1987 • 1d For profit health insurance. We still pay for other people's healthcare, we just do it in a much more bloated and expensive way than universal healthcare. Reply 169 ...

16.

Text - 1 Award Healthcare, all the way. All those heartfelt stories on people who raised 100,000 for their neighbors surgery, and it's great, but no one seems to question why that was necessary in the first place. The person in question has insurance and they're still struggling to pay for this procedure? Even worst if it's life-threatening. People have to make GoFundMe's, petition, all kinds of stuff. To have the basic right to not have to go broke when you see a doctor. E Q Reply ↑ 997 3 •..

17.

Text - vietcong420 · 1d Only getting 10 days worth of annual leave per year and then being encouraged not to use it Edit.. im Irish working in Dublin who gets 22 days leave a year (excluding public holidays which add an additional 9 days to the count) + Reply 545 5

18.

Text - Buttons840 • 18h Identity theft. The bank fails to properly vet someone they gave money to, and now it's your problem. You did nothing, the bank made a mistake. How is that your problem? And look at credit monitoring companies, they claim they can detect fraud on your credit report. Yet, credit monitoring companies and credit reporting companies are one and the same -- literally the same company. So the real message is "pay us and we will not make false reports about you in our credit rep

19.

Text - Mean_Increase_ • 1d Tipping restaurant servers so the owners of the restaurant don't have to pay them a living wage. Reply 2.4k ...

20.

Text - hesitantmaneatingcat · 1d Insurance. Sure it works as intended, but it could be non-profit so rates are cheaper and rebates are given, not so someone can get filthy rich. All the unused money at the end of the year should go back to the insured, not the insurer less a fair wage. Reply 106 ...

21.

Text - dagdegan · 21h Wedding rings and ceremonies and the that whole deal... we can literally trace the need for an expensive ring to a commercial by De Beers... but talk about how it's silly to buy someone a diamond engagement ring and you're met by people saying "wait till you get married" lol Reply 42 ...

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Tumblr User Investigates Maroon 5's Successful Mediocrity

Maroon 5 can feel like bit of a contradiction. It's on every radio station. It gets stuck in your head. It plays in grocery stores. It's rock for your mom. It's certainly not bad, but maybe it's not exactly the greatest. This Tumblr user likens it to a deal with the devil. For more music stuff, here's a tumblr user doing the math to find out Ice Cube's "Good Day" as well as some concerts that didn't live up to the hype.

1.

Text - penicillium-pusher I don't trust Maroon 5 captocie why penicillium-pusher Well first of all there's 7 band members, not 5. That's not why I don't trust them, I just think it's weird.

2.

Text - Now getting to the point, do you know how many top 100 hits Maroon 5 has had? A lot. They're even on billboards top 100 artists of all time (ALL TIME). And it's understandable, because pretty much every song they put out is fucking awesome. Sugar, Don't Wanna Know, Moves Like Jagger, Payphone, This Love, She Will Be Loved, Cold, Animals, Maps, Misery, Harder to Breathe, Never Gonna Leave This Bed... to name a FEW. These shitheads have been popping out jams since I was a little kid. Well o

3.

Text - But here's the thing. They're never the top selling artists. On the top 100 list, they're only in the 40s. They very rarely have a number 1 hit. They're considered good, I suppose.. but not great. Not the best. How many people have you heard say Maroon 5 is their favorite band? For me it's zero. For many of you, it's zero. If you're thinking to yourself "what? No I love them, they're my fave!" Are you sure? Are you really sure? They're your absolute complete FAVORITE band ever??? I doubt

4.

Text - But they SHOULD be everyone favorites. Look at all of those songs. They've got so many top hits. Everyone loves their music. Everyone sings along and knows the songs. They should be my favorite band, I think I like more of their songs than of my actual favorite artist. But they are not my favorite. They are no ones favorite. I think they made a deal with someone. Satan? God? A dude down an alleyway? Who knows. But I believe they made a deal to ensure everyone would love their music. And w

5.

Text - But the twist is that they'll never truly be recognized as one of the best. Sure, their songs will play on the radio and everyone will sing along. They'll have sold out concerts. Plenty of fans. But not enough. They'll be just good. Never great. Never the best. Even if they should be our favorite, they never will be. They'll never sell enough albums or have their songs reach as high on the billboards as they should. Everyone loves their music, per the agreement. But no one loves them. I h

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Low Ranking Punk Tries To Strong-Arm Ship Engineers, Fails Miserably

This story centers on an entitled generally unpleasant low ranking punk who thought he'd go ahead and pitch a fit about the showers not having enough hot water for his daily unwinding session. Little did this guy know though that he was in for the ego check of a lifetime. Just sitting back and picturing how this scene unfolded is enough to put a smile on your face. Fair to say that we don't think this guy was making any more lousy requests about things that he never should've been complaining about in the first place. 

1.

Blue - r/talesfromtechsupport u/Saesama · 4y · Salad Dressing Cannoneer 4 Buddy, you picked the wrong people to try and strong-arm. Long r/ALL Greetings, all. This one is from way back when, about six years ago now, when I was in an entirely different career and halfway around the world. No salad dressing this time, and I'm sure you're all disappointed. +

2.

Text - On a certain class of military warship, there is a place. The bridge may be in control of where the ship goes, but Damage Control Central is in charge of how fast it is getting there and whether or not it arrives in one piece. It's run by a high-ranking officer from Reactor Department (EW) and his two cronies, one that monitors the ship's water usage and one that monitors the ship's electrical usage (hi) These three people can bring 97K+ tons of steel and sadness to a halt. Behind them ar

3.

Text - Eng: DCC, Eng speaking. Eng: The heater doesn't work? Eng: Oh, yeah, that's normal. Eng: No, we can't turn it up. Eng: What? No, we can't replace it, we're in the middle of the Persian Gulf, where are we going to get another one? Eng: Look, it works fine. Take shorter showers. Eng: Your division can put in a request for a bigger one when we get back to home port, but you're not getting one now. Eng: Yeah, no, l'm not ordering one. Replacing those things is beyond the scope of what we're a

4.

Text - Eng: Game faces on, this one is gonna be good. Sir, I am sorry in advance. EW: You kidding? This shit is what makes watch worth-while. We sit back and put on our best 'I hate everything' faces and wait. Not fifteen minutes later, the door thuds open. In walks (with permission) the hero of this little story, a very low- ranking punk (LRP) who think's he's hot shit because he does maintenance on air planes instead of steam pipes. With him is his immediate supervisor (LPO) a gentleman of my

5.

Text - This path will, briefly, place him between EW and a panel that, by the order of people with a rank I could never hope to achieve in my life, the EW is not allowed to be obscured from. They HAVE to be able to see it, at all times. I wait until the merry little band is almost in front of the EW before I speak up. Me: Sir, please go around, the EW needs to be able to see that panel. Divo: I will walk where I damn well- He stops. Because someone of approximately double his rank, four times hi

6.

Text - LPO realizes that a Commander is sitting there and nearly poops himself. LRP is completely oblivious. They walk back around our desks, not nearly as grudgingly as they could have, and take the slightly longer route to the engineering folk. Who are having the time of their lives, because this shit circus is well underway and they haven't had to even do anything yet. Eng spins around, her hands on the arms of her chair, a very pleasant, blank smile on her face. Divo: Are you the one that wo

7.

Text - LPO nearly cringes out of his skin. Because, no, obviously what happened is that LRP went and bitched at LPO that 'those assholes in engineering said they won't fix the broken showers' and LPO immediately went to his office to find some back-up and grabbed Divo. By the way we're all grinning at him, LPO knows he is in for the ass-reaming of his life. Divo, however, looks to LRP for an explanation. The little nematode puffs up, very pleased to have the floor, and an audience to boot. At le

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Tagged: Reddit , revenge
       
 

First Date Deal Breakers People Have

Everyone has their limits when it comes to the kinds of sh*t they'll put up with from someone else. Factor in the tender ground of a first date, and you have an environment where deal breakers can come out of left field at a moment's notice. Many of these might ring a bell from that one date that you'd just as much forget about ever happening. 

1.

White - Markebrown93 • 3h Hygiene, in general

2.

Text - KronktheKronk • 2h I've seen "being rude to wait staff" a dozen times in here. Are that many people rude to waiters?

3.

Text - drdoom • 2h Spending the whole time on their phone

4.

Text - Wizzmer • 2h Too much discussion about money.

5.

Text - celestialism • 3h Asking me zero questions about myself while talking incessantly about themselves. It's alarming how many dudes do this. Why bother going on a date with another human if all you want is to hear yourself talk?!

6.

Text - Scicst • 2h Lying about their appearance. Very specific app example (guess which one). But you see their pictures, they look nice and then they are different in person. Whats the point

7.

Text - GustavoAlex7789 • 2h I don't hate people who smoke particularly but my parents smoked so much that I promised myself to never date someone who smoked.

8.

Text - MailroomMorty • 3h Heavy breathing, open mouth chewer or close minded

9.

Text - avlas • 2h Children. I wish all the best to all the single parents in the world but I am not signing up to be a step-parent.

10.

Text - lordpanda • 2h Unidirectional people. Only talks about work. Only knows about sports. Only cares about travelling. Get a mix.

11.

Text - SuddenTerrible_Haiku • 2h They talk over me and spend the conversation giving me unsolicited advice about how to live my life

12.

Text - kckaaaate • 2h Treating service people poorly. You're rude or dismissive to a waiter or barperson, yeah, it's over before it's started - I know the kind of person you are.

13.

Text - 02K30C1 • 2h If all they talk about is how bad all their exes are. If all your exes are psycho, the chances are the problem is you.

14.

Text - thebrownkid • 2h O opinions on anything. If l'm going to date someone, I want some sort of brains or passion going on up there....

15.

Text - imleesayhi • 3h Dirty clothes. Not showered. Dirty car. Loud booming voice so everyone can hear your conversation. Bad tipper. Being rude to servers

16.

Text - J-Erso • 2h The type of guy who needs to flirt with the waitress or just be heavy

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Manager Assumes Employee's Job Is Unnecessary, Learns Otherwise

What we have here is yet another fine example in a seemingly endless series of managers that never should've been put into positions of power in the first place. Sometimes though, the incompetent managers of the world just need to learn that their ignorant assumptions about the necessary/unnecessary nature of an employee's job through a brutal reality check. Fair to say that such a thing was accomplished in this scenario. 

1.

Text - r/NuclearRevenge u/theFoot58 · 1y + Join 1 Manager thought my job role was unnessacary, finds out the hard way it wasn't Here is a case of two distinct acts of revenge, combining in spectacular fashion to create nuclear revenge. (thanks to redditors in O r/ProRevenge for rewrite help)

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Text - About 20 years ago, I was a sales engineering supporting sales reps at Douchebag Tech Company, (DTC) A new sales manager joins the team, he was a former co-worker from a prior job, a petty little man. Prior were were peers, now he was a manager over the sales reps I supported. I had a seperate chain of command, he was not my manager, but felt he should be. He was resentful of the power that sales engineers in this new company had. In an attempt to show me up he closed a very large deal wi

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Text - But the sales manager doesn't want to do it, because admitting he fucked up would make him look bad. And he bitches at me for bringing up price, because that's supposed to be the rep's job. He calls my boss and shits all over me. My boss took his side, and shits all over me too, so l'm like fuck you I quit. A sent a very lengthy, detailed letter to HR explaining how the sales rep fucked up, lied to the customer, and how the sales manager and my boss tried to make me the scapegoat instead

4.

Text - I find out ABC is suing DTC for fucking up the deal. The deal that the douchebag sales rep manager fucked up, and tried to pin on me. I reach out to ABC, send them a copy of the letter I sent to HR, in which I detailed precisely how badly DTC fucked them over. I talk with one of their lawyers and he's very happy, especially the part in my letter where I describe how the sales rep lied to ABC.

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Text - DTC subpoenas me for a deposition. I have to tell DTC's lawyers everything that I told ABC's lawyers. Lawyer stuff. The day before the deposition, DTC sues me directly. Remember DTC's stock crashing? They're suing me for badmouthing the company and attempting to short their stock. (which I wasn't) However, there's a twist: Because DTC is suing me directly, I don't have to say shit to them at the deposition. Their preparation for the lawsuit goes completely out the window. They know they'r

6.

Text - They're dumbfounded. No idea how they could have fucked this up this badly. Turns out there were two legal teams: One defending against ABC's lawsuit, and another trying to scare people away from talking shit about the company on the internet by indiscriminately suing their critics. They don't communicate with each other, and the one team didn't mention to the other team that they would be suing a key witness in their case. DTC settles the lawsuit with ABC. And they drop the lawsuit again

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Fails and Mistakes That Were Someone's One Job

There are a lot of reasons for failure at someone's one job. Sometimes it's negligence or laziness. Sometimes someone is in the process of learning something new. Sometimes an otherwise competent person has to do the same job with no resources and in a quarter of the time. Sometimes it's the profound ability to ignore common sense. That one is our favorite. It's the main force behind design fails that didn't go as planned.

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Yellow

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Line

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Font - EA MAKE Shuttersock Eaything BETTER Chvema iry 143- Leekiet make hing betler your HAKE MANE Eerything BEARDS TEA BetteR BETTER Timing is Everything Stock Images, TEA MAKE chutterstock Everyithing 8ETTER

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Wall

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Handrail

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Event - MICHELLE KINGSTON LOCAL HEADLINE TEXT GOES HERE ECTION DAfFBLenfee

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Road - STOP SOTP

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Ceiling fan - Haler

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Text - PRO 7 15.15 The Big Met Theory 15.35 How I Bang Your Mother Sitcom 17.00 taff Magazin 18.00 Newstime

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Dairy - Well played, grocery store employee. SUPER T.M. Tastes Like 58% Vegetable Oil Spread Butte $169 DAIRY Made with Sweet Cream Buttermilk No Cholesterol an Fat Sturated fet md ofber Maniat NET WT 16 OZ (1LB) 454g

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Footwear - MetSenvice Newshub FRESH CUM 501230 NERed Capum T3079 5KG NET STORE AT 12°C New Zeand Goumet L 040 PRODUCT OF NEW ZEALAND

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Roof

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Ceiling

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Food

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Tree

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Product - UPS Man, We are home. Please knock loudly. Thanks, Mr. & Mrs. Currier UPS ut

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Natural landscape - R. (Speaking in other language)

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Sport venue - IMAGE: I

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Aerial photography

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News - A NOT IN THE PARIS AGREEMENT COMING UP PUTIN TALKS RUSSIA PROBE IN NEW INTERVIEW NEW TONIGHT LIVE PRESIDENT'S SPOKESMAN SAYS HE CAN'T SPEAK FOR THE PRESIDENT CNN 2:43 PM PT HE WHITE HOUSE SILENCE FIRED FBI DIR. JAMES COMEY? A LOOK AT EXECU SITUATION ROOM INSIGNL STATES ITED

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Product - epsi Pepper pepsi osi SPLASH SPLASH INOSHIELS WINDSHIFLD PEAK Blue DEF Blue DEF

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Clock - 12 10 00 14 15 3 16 4. 17 18 2.

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Footwear - FIRST CLASS MAIL DO NOT BEND DIPLOMA (0.

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Toilet

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Architecture

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Cement - SACARMNETO ST. LICHTIN 120 240 VO CHRISTY

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Tumblr Thread: Sciences Judged By Lickability

Tumblr will have fun with scientific concepts, whether it's a thread on the collateral damage of the mythbusters or going full mythological science on dragon evolution. In this case users decided to judge the sciences on how well they can be licked, and whether or not you should lick that science. It makes perfect sense.

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Text - snowysauropteryx Can you lick the science? An abbreviated list. Genetics: Do not. Unless cheek swabs? Chemistry: NO!!! DO NOT!! Archaeology: Perhaps. But might be human bone. Geology: Sometimes needed, sometimes dangerous

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Text - Psychology: Best not. Physics: ????????? How?????? Zoology: In zoology, science licks you. seananmcguire Anthropology: Maybe ask first. Herpetology: bad plan bad plan BAD PLAN

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Text - whisperwhisk Sociology: Yes, if you have time and dedication and a willingness to piss a lot of people off. Botany: You might hallucinate or die, OR it might be delicious Computer Science: the tingle of electricity on your tongue is how you know it's working Epidemiology: FOR THE SAKE OF THE WORLD PLEASE DO NOT

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Text - carpebutts Linguistics: Despite the name, please probably don't. spooky-son-of-rome Engineering: Maybe, but it'll probably taste like spreadsheets small-home-repair-vikings Software engineering: nothing else has made the code work so you might as well try it

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Text - swordwall Neuroscience: that is someone's brain. no. do not tinysquidrachel Marine biology: you can try, but you'll probably just get a mouthful of seawater thesketcherlass Astronomy: look, if your dedication to lick Uranus is what it takes get humankind to another planet, then so be it Source: snowysauropteryx

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Engineer Gets Ditched In Revenge Of The Week

It's time for the revenge story of the week, and man, is this one a treat. This entitled sound engineer got what was coming his way. It sounds like he was just the kind of presumptuous brat that needed a wakeup call. Fortunately, the crew he worked with and generally drove insane was more than ready to give it to him. And boy oh boy, did that wakeup call come in a brutal fashion. We're talking the guy getting ditched hundreds of miles from home, and eventually having to get picked up by his dad!

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Text - r/ProRevenge u/GhostOfSorabji • 1d + JOIN Apprentice engineer pisses off the crew... gets left behind 250 miles from home Lordy! I was reminded of this story after a recent phone call from an old friend. Rather a long one, so sincere apologies in advance. It's part O r/ProRevenge, part Or/EntitledPeople.

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Text - Some years age, I got a gig working a weekend music festival. Fairly simple too: ten bands per day and all pretty standard rock 'n' roll fare. Bossman puts four of us out on the gig: me, Dreadful Boris, Big Chris and Hammer. He also said we'd be taking out an apprentice, a young lad who was the son of a local promoter. Well, always nice to have an extra pair of hands, and it's good to help train the next generation-after all, that's how we learnt in the past.

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Text - As it turned out this lad was about as much use as an aqualung to a trout, and had an entitled attitude the size of a mid-ranged African country. On the journey down in the truck, he was boasting as to how he was "a really good sound engineer" already and that "he could probably show us a few tricks." Oh, really?

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Text - We get to the venue and get busy unloading the truck: we've got a 16-tonner stuffed to the gills with two sounds desks and about 16KW of sound gear for front-of-house and about 6KW of monitors. As you might imagine, this is pretty heavy stuff and it takes all of us to safely unload it and get it stacked up in place-except that, after unloading the first amp rack (all on wheels but still around 80 kilos), the Entitled Brat snottily announces that “I'm a sound engineer, not a humper...", an

5.

Text - Well, we don't really need him gumming up the works-we're all well used to slinging boxes around, so about an hour later we've got the rig stacked up and strapped down, run out the multicore to the FOH desk, and are ready to start cabling up and tying power into the on-site generator. Out of nowhere, the Spotty Oik emerges from whatever hole he had buried himself in and asks what he can do. I say, "I'm going to plug up front- of-house, perhaps you could help Hammer cable up the speakers.

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Text - "I don't take orders from girlies!" (Quick side note here: Hammer was 5' 9", drop- dead gorgeous and as hard as nails–hence her nickname. She was also a damn fine FOH engineer and a bloody good mate.) Boris, Chris and I collectively groaned inwardly and winced in anticipation of a full 16" broadside from Hammer (seriously, folks-you do NOT fuck with her unless you want the family jewels dangling from the nearest tree!)

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Text - Instead she smiles sweetly (NEVER a good sign) and says, "well l'm sure you'll learn something useful." | then go off to play with cables FOH, while Boris and Chris busy themselves with the monitors. A while later I'm back on stage: Spotty Oik has wandered off again. Hammer has this resigned look on her face: "what happened?", I ask. Turns out that, despite cables and connector ports being well labelled, The Oik had managed to make a complete pig's ear of plugging up the amp racks. Trust

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Text - I found The Oik some moments later and told him that it was not the proper way of doing things, and that if he wasn't sure what to do that he should always ask one of us beforehand. What then came out of his mouth absolutely floored me: “I don't need to know all that shit. I'm a sound engineer!" <blink>

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Text - Hammer, who was standing a few feet away, snorted derisively and rolled her eyes heavenwards. It took me a few seconds to process this particular nugget of stupid: “Well, you HAVE to know how all this works; it's part and parcel of the job and as you're here to learn, I suggest you pay attention." "Well, you're just a bunch of roadies; what do you know?"

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Text - Upon delivering this charming bon mot, he ambles off (again) leaving me to retrieve my jaw from off the deck and Hammer barely able to restrain a fit of laughter that would have incapacitated a rhino. At a guess, this idiot thought he was going to be white-gloving front- of-house for the whole gig. An hour or so later, we're all set up, and we now have a fair idea of the acts that are going to be performing. In situations like this, you rarely get the opportunity of a full-blown soundchec

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Text - A bit of exposition: it's convenient to reuse channels across acts, so I generally keep the first twenty or so channels for drums, bass and guitars, and the last half dozen or so channels for vocals. If a band comes in with anything else- percussion, brass, Tibetan nose flutes etc., we whack them on channels in the middle. Keeps things nice, simple and consistent across the board, and becomes important in a moment.

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Text - The working procedure in-show is also simple: Dreadful Boris and Big Chris run the monitor desk, and Hammer and I run front-of house. We'll do two acts each before handing over to the other (saves wear and tear on the ears) and when we're not running the desk, we'll handle setting up the stage for each act and troubleshooting where necessary, as well as doing runs for food and coffee in between.

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Text - We also tasked the Spotty Oik with helping with the stage setups, which rapidly proved problematical. We finished the first act and aimed to do the turnover within fifteen minutes. Generally the incoming act will tell us their mic requirements and we'll write up a mic plot which then gets sent up to the front-of-house desk. Up comes Spotty Oik with the mic plot and he goes back to help with the stage setup. As I'm checking each mic, I notice that I cannot hear the vocal channels. No soone

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Text - Seconds later he's back on the cans: "Do you know what that fecking idiot has done? Only repatched ALL the vocal channels so that all the plugs on the stagebox are “lined up neatly one after the other!–his words!!" Ye Gods!

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Text - Boris rapidly repatches the mics and we're good to go again. A few hours later and l'm starting my second shift out front (I won't bore you with my experiences of riding herd on Spotty Oik on the stage shift which–shall we say, was interesting. Currently on stage is a rather nice jazz septet (I love doing jazz-give me a nice 20-piece big band and I'm a happy bunny). Up strolls He Who Shall Not Be Mentioned and asks, "When can I have a go at mixing. I'm really good, you know." Seeing as

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Text - he's here to learn I tell him he can take the next act under my supervision. This happened to be an acoustic duo–two guitars and two vocals. Even the most tyro engineer should be able to handle something so simple, right? Wrong!! I've already set what I regarded as a sensible baseline on the faders for him to work with. First thing he does, he reaches for the master faders and cranks in another 15dB–NOO000!!! Immediately the rig teeters on the edge of feedback and I rapidly pull the mains

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Text - He then starts making wildly inappropriate changes to the channels' EQ-again the rig starts to squeak. Ok, enough! I shove him out of the way and bring it back under control. I won't fatigue you further with the endless catalogue of foulups and attitude that he managed to effect over the rest of the weekend, suffice it to say that despite the best efforts of myself and Hammer to try and teach this guy, they all went to naught. Couple this with the constant drip-drip-drip of snide commenta

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Text - Come the end of the event and it's now the fun part of striking the rig and loading out (I'm being sarcastic about the fun part, by the way). Two solid days and we're all knackered and the last thing we want to be doing is the get-out but, of course, it has to be done. It's always an all-hands- on-deck situation... except the Spotty Oik has, once again, vanished into the woodwork.

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Text - Two back-breaking hours later and we're all done, and the truck loaded to go home. So where is the Spotty Oik? Nowhere!

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Text - We give it a good fifteen minutes-but no joy. We then decide to go look for him, so we spent another twenty minutes trolling around the site trying to find him. Again, he's done a disappearing act. We get back to the truck-it's now close to 3am-and almost simultaneously we say, “Fuck him!". We climb back aboard and drive the 250 miles back to the warehouse to unload. Next afternoon, Bossman calls me to find out why we'd left the Spotty Oik behind. I gave him the Cliff Notes and was then t

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Funny, Strange and Goofy Tumblr Gems

There is no limit to the observations tumblr users can make. Whether it's a poignant musing on humanity in general or a bone-chillingly dumb opinion on eggs , there's a time and place for it. Funny, random and shiny tumblr gems burst forth from the full pockets of the internet, not necessarily changing the world but also being time well spent.

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Blue - i-hate-chick-fil-a Folgen Javeigh Young-White Follow @javeigh Why do paintings of people centuries ago never show pimples? Ur telling me these people who drank shit water and took baths 2x a decade had clear skin? 4:50 PM - 12 Sep 2018 45,829 Retweets 271,272 Likes survivablyso Folgen they had this amazing filter, called I'm the one paying you' Quelle: i-hate-chick-fil-a

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Text - roswell-newton-vargas If you guys are ever worried people don't buy me enough Bath & Body Works lotion, I just want you to know you can rest easy because it's the only present I ever get and I don't know what to do anymore. roswell-newton-vargas WHITENATE I can't keep living like this. I don't have enough skin. roswell-newton-vargas The cops beat down the door trying to arrest me for operating an illegal Bath & Body Works reseller but I'm just so fucking silky smooth that they can't catch

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Text - hedgerowdevil Follow OFFICER: the victims were dismembered and sacrificed on an altar made of antlers DETECTIVE: dear god OFFICER: most likely yes fourpawrule Follow FINALLY, A QUALITY PUN. whatdoyoumeanitsnotawesome Follow Hannibal, NBC, 2013

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Text - every human being deserves shelter and a meal optimistic-pessimisms No. You dont pay people to exist for the same reason you dont feed the bears. teaboot Yeah man if I give the 50 year old lady at my bus stop some spare change for fare and a meal she'll lose interest in foraging for desiccated salmon carcasses and lose her natural fear of people. Next thing you know she's in the suburbs, running around on all fours trying to eat a corgi

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Text - Canadian Pride @Fox_Fusion "Why do millennials hate the rich?" "Why do millennials pirate everything?" "Why do millennials drift towards socialism?" "Why are millennial furries?" One answer: Disney's Robin Hood 10:50 PM 10 Jul 18 maneth985 well this didn't go the direction I expected

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Text - Food - Vonderifal COPENIIACEN Buter wor44 16. darkesthorizons: neptuneisforlovers: ITS NOT SEWING SUPPLIES! My question is how does every single person identify with this, is it like a secret rule to use those for sewing supplies?

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Text - verylostpenguin It's my grandpa's birthday next week and he said "I don't want to be 85" and my grandmother, his wife of 59 and a half years, said "well your only alternative is to die", I can't believe how affectionate they are verylostpenguin I was having lunch with them today and my grandpa started throwing napkins at my grandmother, and she balled it up and looked all set to throw it back but then she put it down and said "I will not throw it because I was brought up properly, you wer

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Text - O eggcup-deactivated20180129 hmm? what's that? oh, you don't like my seeds? *evolves into a fruit that bears no seeds but is now a monoculture that is especially susceptible to pests and disease* how about that idiot a gay-bananamancer Don't vague post about bananas you scum 209,131 notes

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Text - lesbianrey my internship boss was talking about how he had to work in a mail room to make ends meet during college where he "only made $6/ hr" and 6.00 in January v 1980 - has the same buying power as $18.73 in January • 2017 Calculate essefex This is why my generation is angry about the minimum wage. %24

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Organism - facts-i-just-made-up: cocktormedick facts-i-just-made-up Mated turtles share their shells! Not always but often when a pair of turtles mates, the male will leave his own shell and move in with the female. After doing so the couple will coordinate their am and leg movements to walk and even swim. I all this "Trying to get notes with false facts." I assure you, Facts-l-Just-Made-Up would never post false facts just to get notes. I also do it to confuse, misinform, and hurt people. Sourc

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Text - People - - cryptid-sighting Follow I just found out that the Korean baseball league's championship trophy is a giant sword YONHAP NEWS patrickdiomedes Follow Every other sports league on the planet needs to get their shit together.

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Forehead - im too much of a baby for tinder i wanna meet people the old fashioned way where we're both on either side of a fish tank and notice each other thru the water... literallytryingmybestbutok Nobody: OP trying to find love through a fish tank:

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Text - zagreus obsessed with this tweet Elijah Personette @Elderqueer No cake in a "cake looks like object" video is in fact cake. It is a pound of fondant wrapped around a miserable little piece of bread the consistency of florist's foam. Beautiful art to be sure, but each is a lie wrapped in another lie, as edible as the object it apes. but also deeply insulted by the implication that fondant isnt delicious fetus-cakes fondant is garbage and I'm willing to duel over that statement

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Text - banjobutch UNREAL: Cartoon Network Tells Children There Are Multiple Genders O subarktis Follow is he saying there's one gender bisexual-supreme Follow There's one gender and we all have to share 13,911 notes

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Screenshot - She wanted to go to the zoo in her new banana costume to see the monkeys. big-nose-seal Follow the monkeys like it retroactivebakeries Follow #pogchimp kkneesockks Follow

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Text - jasontoddiefor Follow Modern Sherlock Holmes but he's a 27 year old, drinks energy drinks only, is astonishing polite and has no idea how the solar system works because it was never relevant to a case but can name every every person involved in making Super Mario Bros because he did need that for a case once. Watson is continuously appalled about his eating habits and makes vague posts on Twitter that ends in threads like Watson: “My roommate noticed only today he can label his email inbo

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Text - an-animal-imagined-by-poe My favorite ever pronoun story has to be one of my German professor's. He fondly remembers being mugged by a gang of teenagers in Dresden, who used Sie (formal you) the entire time. ask-sparkling-awesomeness HAND OVER THE WALLET MY GOOD SIR

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Dog breed - goth-mabel Fanfic written by 14-year-olds is so wild because they all think "smirk" is just a fancy word for smile so every serious romantic scene comes out looking like

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Text - literallyaflame "wait so are u gen z or a millennial" dude idk i was born in 1997, everyone has an opinion about what generation i should be in except me. i don't really remember the 90s cause i was too busy being born and shitting myself, but i remember dialup internet and shit. idk dude i'm so tired, like, i'm only legally old enough to drink as of a few months ago but im somehow already thousands of dollars in debt dingdongyouarewrong the struggles of the zillennials

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Text - xueyangapologist Follow honestly when aliens arrive we should start having sex with them as soon as possible. so when they decide to take over a lot of them already have emotional connections/physical offspring and will form a sizeable resistance. not me, i don't want to, but i know a lot of you would be into that, and i'm telling you it's okay, you're actually the last hope for our species. liesmyth Follow thank you op this means a lot 182,630 notes

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Text - tilthat TIL that in 1946, a trapped moth caused a malfunction in the early computer which resulted in the term 'bug’ to be coined for all software errors. via reddit.com 1dietcokeinacan Follow What an icon pbrim Follow And we know about it because Admiral Grace Hopper, one of the early programmers, wrote about it in her diary and even taped the fried corpse of the moth to the page. 9,098 notes

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Human - silvasaliva: kramergate: ive seen a lot of unintentionally VERY funny interpretations of Cain & Abel but portraying them as a couple of mid-1950s schoolyard boys having a "WHY I OUGHTA" fight is realy just splendid cain: WHY I OUGHTA- narrators voice: And he did, moments later.

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Text - yroxis Personality: I DON'T GIVE A FUCK Anxiety: I do whospilledthebongwater No post has ever described my life as accurately as this one

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Text - Blue - Mattr Graphics Tougher Fdgier Nintendo owldude: bryko: AN ACTUAL SLIDE FROM NINTENDO'S 2003 E3 PRESS CONFERENCE early 2000s is a treasure

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Text - teaberryblue Dogs and Women I was walking to the train station after work today and I heard a guy's voice shouting: "Hey! Hey pretty, you're so pretty, come here! Come here, aren't you going to give me a kiss? Yeah, you, come on and give me a smooch, you pretty thing!" Disgusted, I turned around, ready to knock some heads together, and saw he was talking to a tiny French bulldog being walked by another man. And it hit me, with sharp clarity, just how much a man catcalling a woman sounds l

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Self-Titled Geniuses Who Sprayed the Internet with Cringeworthy Bragging

Whether it's born out of insecurity, compensation or the misguided belief that they are truly the best and brightest, cringeworthy braggarts have covered the internet with their supposed genius. It's amazing to witness someone who thinks so highly of themselves with no proof other than that they just believe they're geniuses.

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Text - So I wanna tweet something but I think most of my followers aren't intellectuals so it's gonna be taken a different way than I want it to. Sigh 10:22 · 23 Jan 20 · Twitter for iPhone

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Water - NowThis Future ... NOW FUTURE 8 hrs • O The science behind stacking 6 different liquids via Seeker SCI See cer + 1500 29 Comments • 67 Shares 188K Views 149 לן Litke Comment Share Ok so you mixed 6 liquids of different specific gravities... to what end... for decoration to impress your less intelligent friends and show off your superior knowledge of elementary physics... cuz it sure doesn't make a novel party drink... hope you have a lot of satisfaction with your small level of superiori

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Text - Finger - Diamond rings are just fine. In this case It does not match the hand so the esthetic is not really there, but this is not an engagement ring and it doesn't really have any meaning. Why wearing a random ring gives such a morale boosts is also very interesting to analyze but many would hate to read the truth, so I will have that conversation with my friends. Reply

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Text - Text - 8m Was shocked and amazea to see Faust trending! Maybe there is hope! Wait... No. It's a Video Game Character! Goethe wrote in Faust my favorite quote. "None are more hopelessly enslaved than those who falsely believe they are free." Stop playing games and go read a damn book 5m w... Faust is trending because it's a video game character. Not because it's one of the best plays ever written. Stop playing games and go to the library. At least try to pretend you're well educated. Goeth

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Text - 6d Ahh you poor miaguided delusional fool. I have plenty of people to borrow money from and give thanks to. I'm happily married and I can see through all the mindless facade that you and your dim ilk are so politely scarfing down your enlarged brainholes. If I am to suicide itll be because i cant take the idiocy of this world any longer. Yes it is depressing being so smart and aware of the downhill ride the world is heading down.. Enjoy your blissful ignorance puny pleb -4 6d Is that like

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Text - So bored i redisgned an atlas with better H. Indatres ONEWORID Apel engines 16cker So d detch Cngine Mocafim C (meled eap Ronds dansh tif 456 AVSRRALIA

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Text - Drugs and alcohol are a bad idea for normal people, but if you're as smart as I am then you have to do things like that just to lower your IQ to a functional level

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Text - 49 mins · I remember being in 6th grade with everyone else in my class thinking "Ice Ice Baby" was the greatest song ever... Picking up on the bass line, i correctly knew that song was a pure rip off of "Under Pressure"... At age 11. JIM CARREY IÇE ICE BABY IN LIVING COLOR, 1991

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Text - Joday at 12:23 PM imagine having an iq lower than 130 dude shut up youre bad with words Today at 12:23 PM you're**

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Text - il 2degrees ? 12:14 AM Tweet Kind reminder. The X chromosome contains 1098 genes. The Y chromosome has only 78 genes. The X chromosome is over 5 times larger than the Y. Its science. Female are superior. By far. Hence hundreds of years of chauvinism to try suppress her. Goodnight. 19/02/18, 10:34 PM 19 Retweets 75 Likes Mh Replying to Onions have more DNA than humans Tweet your reply

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Text - Text - Fiow was your day? It was good. Just watching some Netflix Nice, what are you watching? The Office!! My favorite show. My dad is the epitome of Michael Scott Ugh. What? That show is so..stupid. You don't learn anything from television like that Clearly you are not engaged with proper television that I watch. The Office has nothin but unintelligent humor. I don't have an IQ of 136 for nothing. Try watching something mentally stimulating like The National Geographic or something on t

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Text - Text - Replying to ers Kid, I was born on the internet. I was programming at the age of 8. I used to run websites. I used to sell server space and game servers. In grade 10. All you idiots were born after the iPad. You're all manipulated zombies. YOU don't know what the internet is. 7:25 AM · 15 Jan 20 · Twitter Web App

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Text - Oh really? If we get rid of Samsung Apple will plummet hard, Apple is using all Samsung's software and still can't compete in any real level, so basically you may as well go get a delorean and live in the past as that's exactly what you are promoting! And for you generic people who can't research and are very simple minded (hence being an iPhone lover) a delorean is the car that Doc and Marty McFly use to travel through time 6 05 Like Reply 2d

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Text - Yep. I cringe everytime I see a sports jersey on the streets. I automatically deduct 60 IQ points off that person unless proven otherwise. Reply That's a great way to go about living your life. Why do you say that? I dont like meddling with neanderthals. I look down on the homers of what could be a great progressive society. Im actually cursed cuz ignorance is bliss. + -2

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Text - I can't continue seeing content that is beneath my intellectual level. 3:06 PM · 20 Jan 20 · Twitter for iPhone 2 Likes

16.

Text - Text - Through out my school life. There isn't a single semester where I got all A's and I'm probably the most intelligent person I know. Which is why I don't like to judge my intelligence based on school grades. I'm far more intelligent than my school grades show. 3:40 PM · 13.01.2020 · Twitter for Android 86 Retweets 422 Likes

17.

Text - Text - 6:19 ... Every masterpiece has á cheap copy f TOP COMMENTS Both damn good characters Reply 127 Shitty fucking characters portraying intelligent people wrong, us smart people look the same as everyone else but the only difference is that we exceed in everything -111 What? You're smart? 58 Add a comment 1 Share Award 21.1k 57

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Train Conductor Uses Masterful Investigative Skills

This train conductor clearly chose the wrong profession. The dude has a knack for investigating. That passenger doesn't even know what hit him. 

1.

Text - Ignacio Lopez @comedylopez Witnessed the most amazing thing on the train to Edinburgh yesterday. A guy boarded in Wigan & sat opposite me. He went to sleep for an hour. When he woke up he bought a sandwich, ate it & went back to sleep. (This isn't a maths test, you don't need to know the distance/ speed). 12:45 · 11/01/2020 · Twitter for iPhone

2.

Text - Ignacio Lopez @comedylopez · 3h Replying to @comedylopez Later, the train guard is walking through, checking tickets, and gently wakes the guy. "Can I see your ticket, please?" "Oh, I need to buy a ticket" "Where you going, pal?" The guy glances at his phone. "Edinburgh" "Where did you get on?" 2711 383 Ignacio Lopez @comedylopez 3h I can see the cogs working in this guy's head. He figures out roughly where we are and what the last stop was. "Carlisle" The train guard sits down next to hi

3.

Text - Ignacio Lopez @comedylopez · 3h The guy is wondering if the guard saw him earlier. He decides to go for it. Poker face time. I feel like l'm watching Pacino & De Niro face off in 'Heat! Q1 2711 524

4.

Text - Ignacio Lopez @comedylopez · 3h "I got on in Carlisle" The train guard furrows his brow, puts his ticket machine down and picks up a receipt from the table in front of the guy. "This train stopped in Carlisle 10 minutes ago, but this receipt was issued over an hour ago." 91 2712 467

5.

Face - Ignacio Lopez @comedylopez · 3h RED TABLE TALK EA/OO0000W! GIF 275 403

6.

Text - Ignacio Lopez @comedylopez · 3h Holy shit! Train Guard has evidence. Wasn't this supposed to be made available to the defence team? I can see the beads of sweat forming on the guy's forehead. "That's not mine" (Ladies and Gentlemen of the jury, the evidence the prosecution have is circumstantial) 279 545 Ignacio Lopez @comedylopez 3h ATPTENNIS TV YORKU ola UNIVERSLTE UNIVERSTTS S.com GIF 91 277 332

7.

Text - Ignacio Lopez @comedylopez · 3h "This receipt is for a sandwich, you've got crumbs all over you." He does, too! The train guard is Sherlock Holming the crap out of this. The guy might has well have had mayo on his face. What a plum! one GIF LOCKSPEARE 27 18 831

8.

Text - Ignacio Lopez @comedylopez 3h "That's not mine. I had a sandwich in Carlisle" Damn. He's denying everything. Is the train guard going to inspect the sandwich packaging? "Carlisle to Edinburgh, that's £27. Cash or card?" 91 2712 421 Ignacio Lopez @comedylopez · 3h He's... he's got away with it. Gutted. Really thought the train guard had him. The guy pulls out his wallet & slides over his debit card. There's a definite air of smugness, he put the card on the table like it was a platinum cre

9.

Text - Ignacio Lopez @comedylopez · 3h Oh well, I guess he's evaded justice this time. GIF Forget it Jake, it's Chinatown. 277 356 Ignacio Lopez @comedylopez · 3h Wait... The train guard is looking at the card very closely. The guy appears confused. 277 384

10.

Text - Ignacio Lopez @comedylopez · 3h Maintaining eye contact with the perp, the train guard puts the card down next to the receipt. "This is the same card used to buy the sandwich, sir." The guy's eyes are darting back and forth from the guard to the card. "No.... what?" O 1,006 27 20 Ignacio Lopez @comedylopez · 3h GIF O 442 276

11.

Text - Ignacio Lopez @comedylopez · 3h "The last four digits are printed on the receipt" 278 486 2 Ignacio Lopez @comedylopez · 3h Sweet Falk! He's got him! GIF 27 12 876

12.

Text - Ignacio Lopez @comedylopez · 3h The guy's shoulders slump. No response. Completely dumbfounded. "... and I'm sure if I checked the camera footage we'd see you getting on earlier and buying that sandwich". 279 2 511 Ignacio Lopez @comedylopez · 3h "I fell asleep. I was a bit spaced out" "No problem, sir. Where did you get on" "Wigan" "That'll be £71, please, sir" 27 16 936

13.

Sky - Ignacio Lopez @comedylopez · 3h GIF 277 588 Ignacio Lopez @comedylopez · 3h The guy didn't sleep again after that. He spent the rest of the journey staring down at that receipt. I mean, the real crime here is the price of rail travel but, wow. What a trip. O 28 2767 2,950

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